So I-I killed. So I maimed. So I destroyed one innocent life after another. Aren't I a human being? Don't I yearn, and ache, and shop? Don't I deserve love... and jewelry?
[Morticia nods in sympathetic understanding]
Gomez
Raúl Juliá · 35 quotes
Morticia
Anjelica Huston · 35 quotes
Debbie Jellinsky
Joan Cusack · 30 quotes
Wednesday
Christina Ricci · 30 quotes
Uncle Fester
Christopher Lloyd · 19 quotes
Pugsley
Jimmy Workman · 11 quotes
Grandmama
10 quotes
Joel
David Krumholtz · 10 quotes
Gary
Peter MacNicol · 9 quotes
Amanda
Mercedes McNab · 6 quotes
Becky
Christine Baranski · 6 quotes
Camp Children
3 quotes
Lurch
Carel Struycken · 2 quotes
Most scenes together: Gomez & Morticia (16), Morticia & Debbie Jellinsky (9), Gomez & Uncle Fester (9)
Addams Family Values quotes
Page 2 of 7These Addams men, where do you find them?
It has to be damp.
Would you die for me?
Yes.
Promise?
Yes, I need to renew my passport. I'll be leaving the country very shortly.
Passport Clerk
Will you be traveling alone?
Yes, I'll be a widow.
You know, when I first saw him, I thought he was from Europe.
You did?
It's true.
But I took a bath!
Delivery Room Doctor
[to Morticia]
Push, Mrs. Addams. [Morticia just gives a light "hmm" with a brief rise of her eyebrow; to the Nurse] Forceps?
Forceps Nurse
Forceps. [giving the Doctor forceps] Forceps.
Delivery Room Doctor
Would you like anesthesia?
No, thank you. But do ask the children.
Delivery Room Doctor
Nurse, how close are the contractions?
Delivery Nurse
Every 15 seconds, doctor.
Are you in unbearable pain? Is it inhuman? My darling, is it torture?
Oui.
Don Buckman
Our Amanda's already skipped two grades. How 'bout your boy?
Driver
Mrs. Addams?
Yes?
Driver
Your hearse, ma'am. Where's the body?
Driver
But he's alive.
Tell me about it!
And I'm Becky Martin-Granger!
We're the owners and directors here at Camp Chippewa. America's foremost facility for privileged young adults.
And we're all here to learn, to grow, and to just plain have fun!
'Cause that's what being privileged is all about!
[handing out mail]
Barclay, Cesselman, Calloway, Dexter, Donman, Edwards, Evans, Barclay, Finley, Fisher, Gingham, Ginley, Harper.
Oh, no.
What is it?
This is unspeakable.
Is something wrong, Wednesday? Bad news?
This is the worst thing that has ever happened in the history of human events. Uncle Fester's getting married.
A wedding? But that's great news!
To whom?
The nanny.
Get out of the cabin. I mean, I'd kill myself. The help?
I'm sure she's a very nice lady.
I think that's disgusting. I think their whole family's like some weird medical experiment. I think they're like, circus people.
Campers! Group hug!
Wednesday... Pugsley. Will a hug hurt us?
We don't hug.
Oh, they're just shy.
We're not shy.
We're contagious.
I'm sensing some friction here. Somethin' not quite Chippewa.
Mm-hmm.
But, hey, no problemo. All they need are good friends, good fun, and a little time in the Harmony Hut.
[to the Campers]
Lifesaving! Now I know we're all top-notch little swimmers, but now we get to show our stuff and earn those certificates! Hey, how about our first little pair of lifesaving buddies? Amanda, Wednesday?
Is that your bathing suit?
Is that your overbite?
Now, one of you will be the drowning victim and the other one gets to be our lifesaver.
I'll be the victim!
All your life.
Children, stop it! You're destroying my text!
Yes, indeedy, just the ticket: "Bambi."
"Lassie Come Home."
"The Little Mermaid."
Stop it!
Cara mia.
Mon cher. One house, three children, so many windows. I'm just like any modern woman trying to have it all. Loving husband, a family. It's just, I wish I had more time to seek out the dark forces and join their hellish crusade.