[RJ had climbed his way to the top of the hill.]
Wow!
[RJ looks up to see Vincent leaning against a tree and holding a pair of binoculars.]
Wow.
So, I was just on my way down here to kill you, but I stopped to watch the show and I gotta say... [gives RJ his binoculars and shows Verne and his family being taken away by Dwayne] that right there is a thing of beauty. That is the most vicious, deceitful, self-serving thing I've ever seen. [chuckles] Classic, RJ You take the food and they take the fall. You keep this up, you're gonna end up just like me, having everything you ever wanted.
What, them? Who are you kidding? You said it yourself, you're a family of one. Always will be. It's how guys like you and me survive. So, a few saps got hurt in the process. Tough, that's life. Trust me, you don't need them.
Actually...I do. And right now, they really need me. So I really need this! [pushed the wagon with all the food]
[Vincent lunges at the truck, the force causing Dwayne's foot to fall against the gas pedal.]
We're out of control!
It's just like Auto-Homicide 3!
Verne, let me in! Wrong button! Wrong button!
G GPS
Please select destination.
Take us home! Take us to the log!
G GPS
Previous destination selected. Make a legal U-turn.
Thank you! Yes, Yes! [The animals end up throwing him out] Hey! Let me in, let me in!
No! Ring-tailed charlatan! [rolls up the window]
He's just trying to help us. Just let him in!
But he came back. [Vincent's roar is heard]
L Lou
And he brought a bear!
[while driving the van, the others are arguing]
Hey! No fighting while we're driving.
We will turn this van around, mister. [The animals were shocked and stunned]
L Lou
[points at Verne]
He started it.
I'm telling you. He's just trying to help us, really.
But, Verne, you're the one who always says trust your tail.
Hey! Thank you, thank you.
And your friends are next.
G GPS
Make an immediate left turn.
G GPS
[Glady screams truck horn. Hammy waving hand hello.]
You have arrived.
We've gotta go, we've gotta go!
The old jazz dance injury.
You guys wanna party, do you? All right then! Let's Party!
[Dwayne continues to zap RJ and Verne in the hedge and Vincent claws the hedge]
Mom!
Kids! Penny, Lou, look out! Down! That's it! Verne, get everybody out of here. I'll distract him.
Are you crazy? He'll kill you.
Well, I'm the one he wants. Take care of your family, Verne.
I intend to. The whole family. There's got to be something we can do.
[pops out from the top of the hedge]
Hey, Vincent, you were right! [holds up a potato chip] With a Spuddie, enough just isn't enough! [then eats the potato chip]
[last words; outraged]
RJ!!!
O Ozzie
Now, Hammy. Go, go, go!
[Hammy starts to go crazy as the camera zooms in on his eye, which widens greatly. Cut to the Earth, which slows down and stops spinning completely. Hammy is moving so fast it looks like time itself has stopped. Hammy looks around. Everyone and everything is completely frozen, except for him. He walks past The frozen Dwayne and Gladys before turning on the Depelter Turbo to the highest setting. He then notices the cookie on the roof of Gladys' house. He eats it and dodges the slow moving lasers. He then gets an idea. He places the lawn gnome trap underneath Dwayne's foot. As time slowly resumes, a naked Verne pulls the shell-wearing RJ out of Vincent's mouth. RJ salutes goodbye to Vincent as the bear lands on top of Dwayne and Gladys, setting off the lasers]
The Depelter Turbo. Prepare for a lot of stinging! Oh, no! No, no! No, no! No! [A powerful beam of light flashes, reaching all the way to space, destroyed a satellite. Cut to the Milky Way Galaxy, where a small, white light is seen glowed brighter than the other stars. The animals roasting marshmallows and pops popcorn as they watched the three villains getting incinerated by the beam of light]
That stung like I knew it would! [The three villains are completely fried, nearly completely bald, and trapped in a cage]
A All
Whoo-hoo-hoo! Whoo-hoo!
Good job, everybody. That's teamwork.
Come here, Hammy. Come here. You are a genius, my boy.
And, Verne, don't you ever fix this shell!
Yeah. Glad it's working for ya. Take it off, give it back.
Ranger [In the neighborhood, two animal rangers carry Vincent away, relocating him to the Rocky Mountains]
Here we go, off to the Rockies for you, Smokey.
Police Officer [At the same time, a scorched up Gladys and Dwayne are lead away in handcuffs by the police for possessing the illegal and inhumane Depelter Turbo]
Now, you do realize that was a Depelter Turbo?
[desperate, wanting arrest to go to jail]
Officer, please! It was the Verminator! He sold it to me! This has nothing to do with me!
Police Officer Hey, hey! It was in your yard. Your name's on the contract, so you can tell it to the judge.
NO! It's not my fault! Let go of me! [She shoves the officer in a panic-filled rage.]
Police Officer Ma'am.
[last words]
I CAN'T BE ARRESTED! I'M THE PRESIDENT OF THE HOMEOWNER'S ASSOCIATION!? [She attacks the police officer in the face. She tries to run but another cop tackles her]
C Cop
Take her down! [The other Police Officer gets back up and body-slams her.]
Police Officer We got a twitcher! Watch it! Ma'am! [Dwayne tries to take advantage of the cop's attention on fighting Gladys.]
[to the cops]
Get her! [sneaks away and she karate-kicks one of the officers. They all continue fist fighting as Dwayne walk away in the climbs fence.]
Police Officer [faintly]
Stop that! Can I get help over here? [as Dwayne climbs over a fence] Somebody get a hold of her legs! [Dwayne then accidentally steps on a squeaky toys off-screen]
[last words]
Oh, no. No, no! No, no! NO! [a bite was heard, results him to screams in pain. Cuts in the hedge and animals cheers]
H Heather
High five, Hammy!
Yes! It worked! It worked! We did it!
[off-screen]
STELLAAAAAAAAAA!!! STELLA!!!
Oh, Stella! Ah, so this is the outdoor woods? I like it.
Come on, big boy. You're coming with me.
You know, RJ, uh, just for the record, if you had told us that all that food you were trying to get was to pay back an angry bear, we would have given it to you.
Yeah, that's what families do. They look out for each other.
I never really had anything like that.
I know, but believe me, this...This is the gateway to the good life.
Really wish you've told me that sooner.
Well, that's bad communication. Also something families do. So, what do ya say? Wanna be part of it?
Come here, come here. I promised I wouldn't do this. OK.
O Ozzie
Welcome to the family!
What a first week of spring, huh? Wait a minute! That means there's only 267 days left till winter. What are we gonna do for food?!
LOOK, LOOK! I FOUND MY NUTS! [slams into the camera]
[During the credits, When "Rocking the Suburbs" plays in the background]
That, my friends, is the object of all human attention and devotion, and they call it...a TV.
You see, humans feel an inner need to connect with the world around them.
L Lou
That is just super-duper.
They also feel a need to sit on their fat butts, watching TV fulfills both needs at the same time.
P Penny
Come on, kids! Family time there, in front of the TV! Got your snack food?
Buy a vowel! BUY A VOWEL! Buy a "Y", Please buy a "Y"!
O Ozzie
I can't find the remote.
L Lou
Hey, Spikey! Race ya!
O Ozzie
Has anybody seen the remote?
I could do a little TV. I think today's the day we find out if the baby is gifted or if Saxon is really an alien.
Just Like Khan in Star Trek 2! The Genesis Project was in the hands of the Enterprise, but Khan had his plan to steal the invention and redo all the life!
I saw it on TNT, a retrospective.
H Heather
Gummy Worm, anybody?
This is the perfect food.
Fat-free cookies? You might as well just be eating dirt.
I've had dirt, I don't like dirt, it tastes like dirt!
H Heather
Shh! The Show is starting!
[The last part of "Rocking the Suburbs" by Ben Folds continues on the credits]
