Shawn Wayans movie quotes

View Quote [At the hockey game, one of the Chiefs fans notices his beer cup is empty. Unaware Calvin drank it, he thinks Darryl did it, and hits him on the back.]
Hockey fan: [irritated] Hey, man! Get your own!
Darryl: What?
Hockey fan: Beer! It's empty!
Darryl: So get another one!
Hockey fan: [loses his temper] I'm gonna--
[The Chiefs fan is about to attack Darryl, but is held back by his friend, while other fans attack Darryl.]

View Quote Pops: You don't mess with a man from Detroit? You hear me? I'm from Detroit!
Darryl: What the hell's going on here?
Vanessa: Daddy, get off of him. Get off of the baby.
Darryl: Stop it.
Pops: That ain't no baby, that's a criminal.
Vanessa: I've had it with you. I'm calling Whispering Glen.
Pops: Vanessa, I ain't crazy. You see, I know what is and I know what ain't is. And he ain't is what he say he is. You see, is is and ain't's ain't. Check the teddy bear. The teddy bear. Teddy bear knows. Come on, then. Please.
Whispering Glen Manager: We'll take good care of your father. Whispering Glen is a safe facility. Give him a couple days to adjust...
Pops: Let me go!
Whispering Glen Manager: ...and then come visit.
Pops: Vanessa, believe me. Is is, ain't's ain't.
Nurse: Use the taser if you have to.
Pops: Check the teddy bear. The teddy bear. [screams as he gets tased]

View Quote Walken: What the hell's going on here? That ain't no baby. Who else is here?
Darryl: Nobody.
Walken: Who's here?!
Darryl: Nobody, I swear.
Walken: Come on, inside, inside. There's the little monster. What does he got there?
Darryl: It's an airplane.
Walken: Tell him to get rid of the plane. Get rid of it!
Darryl: Calvin, throw the plane. [Calvin throws the plane and both Darryl and Calvin stay still]
Walken: What are you doing? [Calvin and Darryl point the airplane at him and the plane hits his groin and he falls to the ground on his knees]
Darryl: Don't move!
Walken: [laughs] Save it, tough guy. You're not gonna shoot me.
Calvin: But I will.
Cop 1: Freeze, police!
Cop 2: Freeze, police!
Cop 1: I got this. You, check the house. Black cops, come with me. White lady, you stay here.
Walken: I'm telling you, guys, that ain't no baby. He's a mastermind behind the whole thing.
Cop 1: Get him outta here.
Walken: He's a stone-cold killer, that kid.
Roscoe: Would you get this thing off me?!
Cop 2: Relax. Where you're going, you might wanna keep that on.
Bruno: I don't wanna go to jail. It's too dark. There's no TV.

View Quote Ashtray: Oooh, girl, you so tight!
Dashiki: Wrong hole, fool!

View Quote Ashtray: Hey, Preach, what up n***a?
Preach: Y'all need to stop using the word n***a. You see, it's terms like the word n***athat the white man uses to take away the self esteem of another race.
Ashtray: Word.
Preach: Oh yeah, remind me to pick my laundry up from that c***k mother****er up the street.

View Quote Ashtray: Loc Dog was America's worst nightmare, raised in a house with three generations of hopelessness, poverty... and profanity.
Loc Dog's Mom: Loc Dogg, turn that loud ass motha****in music down, you wakin up the ****in babies, motha****a. This still my motha****in house, motha****a...
Loc Dog's Mom: Who tha **** is that on my porch?

View Quote Cindy: We have to call the police.
Ray: No way, I ain't goin' to jail!
Cindy: We have to!
Greg: Hey, Cindy! Do you know what happens to young boys in prison?! All those sex starved convicts just waitin' for a fresh piece of meat?!
Ray: Hey, you're right, Cindy, maybe we should call the police.

View Quote (Ray is stabbing Bobby)
Cindy: You guys are psychos! You've seen one too many TV shows!
Ray: No! Watching TV shows doesn't create psycho killers... cancelling TV shows does! (continues to stab Bobby with more violence) The Wayans Brothers was a good show, man! It was a good-ass show! And we didn't even get a final episode!

View Quote Cindy: Wait, shouldn't we check his wallet?
Buffy: For what?
Brenda: Shit, he might have some money. We already committed murder, we might as well rob his ass!
Bobby: Good idea, I'll take credit cards!
Brenda: I want the jewelry!
Ray: I'm-a take his drawers!