Pops quotes from Little Man (2006)

Pops

Oh, no, you don't! No, you don't! No, no, no!

Dad!

Darryl

C'mon, Pop, let him sit there. Let him have a cookie.

Pops

This is my throne, my sanctuary. This is my air, my end zone.

Darryl

It's just a cookie.

Pops

Oh, it start with the cookie. And then they want to come to dinner. Then they want to move in. Next thing you know, they're married to your daughter.

Darryl

See, why he got to bring it back here when he...

Pops

He already made that mistake once.

Darryl

Hey, hey. Come on, now.

Pops

Mmm-mmm.

Honey.

Pops

No more, my brother. Nobody makes a fool out of me. I'm from Detroit.

Ooh, someone is at the door.

Darryl

I can't wait for everyone to meet little Calvin. I am so excited.

Pops

Yeah, yeah. Introduce him to everybody else, and then go over to someone else's house. Cookie's got a little bite to it.

Pops

Hold it right there. Who you talking to, sonny boy? Oh, don't give me that old "goo-goo, ga-ga" crap. Hand me that damn phone! Who is this?

Me sorry. Me no speak no English. Wrong number, sorry.

Pops

What the...? Who the hell's no speak the English? Who is this? Say something.

Darryl

Pop, what are you doing?

Pops

I heard some noises, came downstairs and caught this little hoodlum on the phone. He must've been looking for the safe.

Darryl

We don't have a safe.

Pops

Well, he didn't know that.

Calvin

Da-da.

Darryl

Pop, man. He's a baby. It's his first night in a new house. He probably couldn't get no sleep. Look at you, man, holding a shotgun and wearing red socks. You look like Fred Sanford on crack. Put that away, man. Go to bed.

Pops

Oh, man, you are good. You are real good. Yeah, I'm gonna keep my eye on you. [Calvin gives him the middle finger] Ooh, you gonna give me the finger? Where'd you learn that, huh? BET videos after dark?

Pops

You don't mess with a man from Detroit? You hear me? I'm from Detroit!

Darryl

What the hell's going on here?

Daddy, get off of him. Get off of the baby.

Darryl

Stop it.

Pops

That ain't no baby, that's a criminal.

I've had it with you. I'm calling Whispering Glen.

Pops

Vanessa, I ain't crazy. You see, I know what is and I know what ain't is. And he ain't is what he say he is. You see, is is and ain't's ain't. Check the teddy bear. The teddy bear. Teddy bear knows. Come on, then. Please.

We'll take good care of your father. Whispering Glen is a safe facility. Give him a couple days to adjust...

Pops

Let me go!

...and then come visit.

Pops

Vanessa, believe me. Is is, ain't's ain't.

Use the taser if you have to.

Pops

Check the teddy bear. The teddy bear. [screams as he gets tased]