Donkey Kong [Donkey Kong enters the Great Ring of Kong; he dances to the DK Rap from "Donkey Kong 64", with the crowd cheering] [raps along]
I'm D.K.! I'm Donkey Kong!
YK Young Kong
Yeah! We love you!
Donkey Kong Oh, yeah! [waves at his father] Hi, Dad! Hi!
Donkey Kong [dancing]
Dad, wave back!
Enough with the showboating!
Donkey Kong What do ya mean?! They like it! It's what they came here for! Dancin' pecs! [flexes his chest]
[to crowd]
Okay, simmer down! [the crowd still cheers] I said, "Simmer down!" [the crowd stops cheering]
DK Diddy Kong
D.K.! D.K.! D.K.! D.K.!
That means you, Diddy Kong!
DK Diddy Kong
D.- [sits down] Sorry.
Now, since I want this fight to last more than five seconds, I put power-ups around the arena. You're welcome, Mario!
Donkey Kong [smugly]
I don't anything special to break every bone in your tiny body!
[after defeating Donkey Kong]
Had enough?
Donkey Kong [weakly]
Not...even...close. [almost falls off the platform]
[grabs Donkey Kong by his tie]
I'll take that as a "Yes."
T Toad
[Donkey Kong falls, and Mario jumps on him; the Kongs in the crowd cheer and chant "Mario!"]
Yes! That's my best friend!
[gasps]
No! No! [The flying Clown Cars starts snatching him and the Kongs away] Get your clown claws off of me!
[cackling]
Goodbye, Mario.
Donkey Kong [From above Rainbow Road, Mario and Donkey Kong are falling] [throws debris]
HEY! THIS IS YOUR FAULT!
My fault?! You're the one who-
Donkey Kong STOP TALKING! I don't want the last thing I hear before I die to be your- [he and Mario crash into the ocean. Donkey Kong is knocked unconscious, but Mario manages to bring him up to the surface by pulling him by his tie. A large creature closes its jaws beneath them. They surface]
Donkey Kong Mario... you saved my life.
Yeah, well...I won't tell anyone. But I don't know or remember what happened.
Donkey Kong No, thank you. Good, please don't.
Okay. [hears bubbling sound from below] Uh...did you just...feel something?
Donkey Kong [The Maw-Ray rises up out of the water behind them. Mario and Donkey Kong scream and start swimming away]
Swim!
[The Maw-Ray closes its jaws around them]
Donkey Kong [Inside the Maw-Ray]
So, this is the end; being slowly digested by an eel next to an idiot in overalls.
Well, at least your brother isn't gonna die because of you.
Donkey Kong [crossing his eyes]
At least you're not gonna die with your dad thinking you're a joke.
[sullen]
Yeah, well, my dad thinks I'm a joke, too.
Donkey Kong [sadly]
Yeah? Well... [angrily] Your dad's right!
You know what? I feel bad enough. Just, just leave me alone.
Donkey Kong I've never met your dad, but he sounds "brilliant".
Just go in a corner and smash some stuff, smash monkey!
Donkey Kong [furiously throws a tire down, and slams his fists]
I...AM...MORE...THAN A GUY...WHO SMASHES THINGS!!!!!
[The Maw-Ray burps; they find the engines of Donkey Kong's racing cart, look at one another, and smile. Cut to them launching themselves out of the Maw-Ray's mouth]
[Tanooki Mario swoops down and catches Luigi before he can drop into the lava]
Huh?
I told ya! See? As long as we're together, everything is gonna be okay!
[laughs]
Mario, why do you look like a bear? What is this?
[Donkey Kong frees Cranky Kong from his cage]
Ya did good, kid. Make your pecs dance, you deserve it.
Donkey Kong No time now, definitely later.
[Bowser, trapped in ice, regains consciousness and sees Mario, Luigi, Peach, Toad, and Donkey Kong together; he breathes fire and sets his head free.] [bellowing]
LAUNCH THE BOMBER BILL, AND DESTROY THE MUSHROOM KINGDOM!!!!
[Bomber Bill shoots out of the volcano-like opening in Bowser's Castle and speeds at Peach's Castle]
No...
[Tanooki Mario flies beside the Bomber Bill, trying to get its attention]
Hey, hey...Hey, over here! [tries hitting the Bomber Bill's side, to no effect. He tries pushing the Bomber Bill's front, but ends up with his back against its tip.] You asked for it! [smacks the Bomber Bill's eye with his tail. The Bomber Bill stops in mid-air, bending the flagpole on top of Peach's Castle, glaring at him] Heh. Hello. [the Bomber Bill chases him through the Mushroom Kingdom. He crashes through a large mushroom] Ow! [gets the Bomber crashing into two more large mushrooms, getting some of the last one in his mouth before spitting it out] Really?! [spots the Warp Pipe that first brought him to the Mushroom Kingdom] Follow me! [starts leading the Bomber Bill to the Warp Pipe] Come on. [gets the Bomber Bill flying straight into the Warp Pipe's direction and speeds up] Little closer. [gets as close as possible to the Warp Pipe without going in it and flies upward at the last second; in slow motion] Mamma mia! [normal speed; Bomber Bill is sucked into the Warp Pipe with great force, but it explodes after floating into the Warp Zone, creating a visible disturbance on the outside of the Mushroom Kingdom's Warp Pipe] Huh?
[The Warp Pipe creates an explosion that throws Tanooki Mario against the wall of Bowser's Castle and powers him down. Mario falls before grabbing onto a ledge of Bowser's Castle. The Warp Pipe pulls Luigi, Peach, Toad, Bowser, and Donkey Kong in. Mario loses his grip on the ledge and is pulled after them]
[Mario and Luigi defeat Bowser with the Super Star; they, Peach, and Donkey Kong approach Bowser]
Peaches. [chuckles nervously] Uh, listen, this is not the way I pictured it, but give me one more chance.
Ew, no. [brings out the Mini Mushroom]
No-no-no-no-no-! [Peach stuffs a Mini Mushroom into Bowser's mouth, causes him to shrink; in a high-pitched voice] Hey! Hey! That is not cool!
Donkey Kong Ha! He got the Blue Mushroom!
[Toad puts Bowser into a jar]
See? Told ya I'd get you a pet turtle.
[giggles]
Not bad, mustache. And Luigi, you're so brave.
Oh, thanks. [chuckles] Yeah, it's kind of my thing.
