Kamek quotes from The Super Mario Bros. Movie (2023)

View Quote Kamek: [as Bowser is singing "Peaches"] Sire.
Bowser: [growls] What?
Kamek: A report from our intelligence; A mustachioed human has arrived in the Mushroom Kingdom. [Bowser angrily growls; stumbles in fear] The princess has been training him. They are up to something, sire.
Bowser: [calms himself] Sit. Jam with me. [Kamek sits next to Bowser, as he starts playing the Underground Theme] This, uh, human, where did he come from?
Kamek: We aren't sure.
Bowser: Does the princess...like him?
Kamek: Sire, look in the mirror; you have nothing to worry about.
Bowser: I know that. I'm not threatened. [slams cover on Kamek's fingers]
Kamek: [screams in pain]
Bowser: FIND OUT WHO HE IS, AND WHAT THEY'RE PLANNING!! [slams his fist and storms off]
Kamek: [painfully] I'm on it, sire. May I lift the cover?
Bowser: [walking away] Not yet. Pain is the best teacher.

View Quote Bowser: Princess Peach, brave as ever. [Kamek appears aside him] As you can see, I have the Super Star.
Peach: If you're going to use it, use it now. [points her harpoon at Bowser]
Bowser: No, Princess, I stole this star for us. I guess...love really makes a guy come out of his shell, heh-heh-heh. [beat; to Kamek] I told you that line wouldn't work!
Kamek: You're doing great.
Luigi: Mario.

View Quote [As Peach is about to marry Bowser]
Kamek: Ah-he-he-hem. Dearly belov- [Peach punches him] Agh!
Bowser: Huh?
[All Koopas gasp]
Dry Bone: Drama.
Peach: You really thought I'd marry you?
Bowser: Kinda.
Peach: [without missing a beat] I'd never marry a monster. [powers up with Ice Flower, becoming Ice Peach]
Bowser: [enraged] THEN WE ARE BREAKING UP RIGHT NOW!
[They start fighting]