M Mater
Holley! Finn! Where are we?
We're in London, Mater. Inside Big Bentley.
M Mater
[Mater, tied up in ropes, suddenly drops, the clock's gears lowering him several meters; a gear Finn and Holley tied in brings them closer to an intersecting gear]
Oh, this...this is all my fault.
M Mater
But I am, remember? You said so.
When did I-? Oh. Mater, I was complimenting you on what a good spy you are.
M Mater
[angrily]
I'M NOT A SPY! [this echoes throughout the clock; slumps in defeat] I've been tryin' ta tell you that the whole time. I really am just a tow truck.
[taking this in]
Finn, he's not joking.
M Mater
You were right, Finn. I'm a fool. And what's happened to McQueen is 'cause I'm such a big one. This is all my fault.
[Grem and Acer arrive on a lift, roll into view on a catwalk]
Good, you're up!
Professor Z wanted you to have a front row seat for the death of Lightning McQueen.
M Mater
He's still alive?
[whips a sheet away for the WGP Camera in the clock's face]
Not for much longer.
[Mater suddenly drops more towards the gears; the gear Finn and Holley tied in brings them closer to the intersecting gear that would crush them]
And now, our last competitor. Number 95: Lightning McQueen!
Ka-chow! Thank you so much for having us, Sir Axlerod. I really look forward to racing. This is a great opportunity.
The pleasure's all ours, Lightning. You and your team bring excellence and professionalism to this competition.
M Mater
DAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!! Someone give me water! Aah! [sticks his tongue underneath the waterfall] Oh, sweet relief. Sweet relief. [now sated, approaches the microphone] Whatever you do, do not eat the free pistachio ice cream. It has turned. [echoes]
Sir Axlerod, I can explain. This is Mater. He's--
No, I know him. This is the bloke that called in to the television show. You're the one I have to thank.
M Mater
No, thank you. This trip has been amazing.
[Miles leaks oil and blames it on Mater, tells Mater off]
Ah! He's a little excited, isn't he?
M Mater
But wait, I-- Oh, shoot!
Uh, have you got a towel?
Mater, you have to get a hold of yourself. You're making a scene!
M Mater
But I never leak oil. Never.
Go take care of yourself right now. [Mater shamefully drives away]
M Mater
[now speeding]
Comin' through! Excuse me. Leakin' Oil. Where's the bathroom? Thank you. I gotta go. Oh, uh-- Uh-- [goes into the ladies' bathroom, the women cars scream in embarrassment] Sorry, ladies!
C Crabby
[A fishing vessel is sailing on the open ocean at night, completely alone.]
Alright, buddy, we're here. Right where you paid me to bring you. Question is, "Why"?
[comes out from the shadows on Crabby's stern deck]
I'm looking for a car.
C Crabby
A car? Heh! Hey, pal. You can't get any further away from land than out here.
Exactly where I want to be.
C Crabby
Well, I got news for you buddy. There's nobody out here but us.
TT Tony Trihull
[blows his horn]
What are you doing out here?
C Crabby
What does it look like, genius? I'm crabbin'!
T Tony
Well, turn around. And go back where you came from.
C Crabby
Yeah? And who's gonna make me? [Tony reveals his bow-mounted missile turret] All right! All right! Don't get your prop in a twist! [Crabby turns away and begins sailing back] What a jerk! Sorry, buddy. Looks like it's the end of the line. Buddy?
[Lightning is missing Mater at the race in Italy as the racers gather at the finish line] [Notices Lightning is sad.]
Francesco understands this, McQueen.
Oh, great. Here it comes. What've you got, Francesco?
For famous race cars like Francesco and, well... you, to be far away from home, is not easy.
[sarcastically]
I think you forgot the insulting part of that insult.
[emotionally]
It's-a no insult! When Francesco is away from home, he misses his mama! Just like you miss your tow truck, amico.
[impressed]
Gee, I maybe misjudged you, because that's exactly how I--
[smiling]
Of course! I am at home! And my mama is right here! [points and waves at a vintage Ferrari in the crowd who is smiling, blowing kisses and waving back] Mama! Don't worry, Mama! McQueen is very sad! I will beat his cry-baby bottom today!
And... there's the insult we were missing. Grazie!
M Mater
[Meanwhile, the flashback begins with Mater looks at the flashbacks]
"Idiot"? Is that how you see me?
That’s how everyone see you. I tell you, that’s the genius of it. Nobody realizes they’re being fooled. Because they’re too busy laughing at the fool.
M Mater
[Mater opens the door like Gates of Heaven. The first flashbacks in crowd in Tokyo, Japan]
Excuse me! Domo arigato!
M Mater
[At the second flashback...] [Knocks the window]
You done good. You got all the leaves.
J Jeff
Check out that tow truck.
L Lewis
Man, I wonder who that guy's with.
Will you guys excuse me, just a one little second.
M Mater
[At the third flashback...]
Now that's a scoop of ice cream.
SC Sushi Chef
[In Japanese]
My condolences.
M Mater
[Mater eats the Wasabi Ice Cream. And then running to the water. At the fourth flashback...]
Someone give me water! [sticks his tongue underneath the waterfall] Oh, sweet relief.
M Mater
[Francesco and the WGP Racers laughing at Mater. At the fifth flashback...]
But I never leak oil. Never.
Mater, you have to get a hold of yourself. You're making a scene!
M Mater
[At the sixth flashback...] [noticing Lightning's angry glare]
Wait a minute. I didn't screw you up, did I?
[angrily]
I LOST THE RACE BECAUSE OF YOU!!
M Mater
Maybe if I talk to somebody...
I don't need your help. I don't want your help.
M Mater
[Mater is sad after the flashbacks. Then the final flashback with Mater banging the gong with everyone laughing.]
Band that gong! Get it on!
[offscreen]
Listen, this isn't Radiator Springs. This is exactly why I don't bring you along to these things!
[Mater is shocked and dream ends. Mater wakes up inside the Big Ben in London, England.]
P Photographer
[The camera shows McQueen, Francesco and Carla on the podium as they get interviewed]
Francesco!
Francesco, over here. Hey, what was your strategy today?
Strategia? Francesco needs-a no strategy, it’s-a very simple: You start the race, wait for Lightning McQueen to choke, pass him, then win. Francesco always-a wins, it’s a boring. [Lightning rolls his eyes.]
I gotta tell you dude, you were in trouble for awhile. That dirt track section had you crawlin’. [Lightning notices Mater leaving and sneaks off.]
To truly crush one’s dream, you must first raise their hopes very high.
[meets up with Mater in his pit garage]
MATER!
M Mater
Hey, McQueen! What happened, is the race over? You won, right?
Mater, why were you yelling things at me while I was racing?!
M Mater
"Yellin'"? Oh, you thought... [chuckles] Oh! That's funny right there. Naw. See, that's 'cause I seen these two fellers doing some sort of karate street performance. It was nut so. One of 'em even had a flamethrower...
[with worry and disbelief]
"A flamethrower"? What are you talking about? I-I don't understand, where were you?
M Mater
Goin' to meet my date.
M Mater
She started talkin' to me as a voice in my head, tellin' me where to go–-
Lightning: What?
M Mater
[noticing Lightning's angry glare]
Wait a minute. I didn't screw you up, did I?
[angrily]
I lost the race because of you!
M Mater
[shocked]
Oh, I'm sorry, I didn't mean to.
An imaginary girlfriend? Flamethrowers? You know, this is exactly why I don't bring you along to these things!
M Mater
Maybe if I, I don't know... talk to somebody, and explain what happened, I could help.
I don't need your help. I don't want your help. [drives off, but is stopped by the paparazzi and Mater is upset]
R1 Reporter 1
Hey, there he is!
R2 Reporter 2
McQueen, you had it in the bag!
R3 Reporter 3
Yeah, what happened?
I-I made a mistake, but I can assure you, it won't happen again. [Mater drives over to the TV monitors; he slumps] Look, guys. We know what the problem is, and we've taken care of it! [Mater sadly drives away]
[on TV]
Lightning McQueen loses in the last lap to Francesco Bernoulli in the first race of the World Grand Prix. And three, count em', three cars flamed out, leaving some to suggest that their fuel, Allinol, might be to blame.
[interviewed]
Allinol is safe! Alternative fuel is safe! There is no way my fuel caused these cars to flame out!
Well, the jury may still be out on whether allinol caused these accidents, but one thing's for sure: Lightning McQueen blew this race!
Team McQueen can’t be happy right now.
