King Neptune
I am the king! I must enforce the laws of the sea.
6th most-quoted character in The SpongeBob SquarePants Movie (2004): in 10 of its 96 quotes
Most scenes with: Patrick Star (4), Plankton (4), Princess Mindy (4)
MY CROWN! AAHHHHHHH!!!! SOMEONE HAS STOLEN MY ROYAL CROWN!
More lines from King Neptune
5 quotes
King Neptune
Prepare to burn, Krabs!
King Neptune
Squire, will you hurry? AHHHHH!!!!!
King Neptune
Where am I in, crazy town?! I HAVE HAD ENOUGH OF THIS NONSENSE!!!!! You... are to wait in the carriage until the execution is done! NOW!!!!!
King Neptune
All Hail Plankton.
Scenes with King Neptune
4 scenes[wrecking the stage of the Krusty Krab 2]
Let's hear it for SpongeBob! [realizes everyone ran off] Hello? Where did everybody go? Did I miss something? Did you see my butt?
French Narrator
Later that evening.
About another time to put Plan Z into effect. Starting at the undersea castle of King Neptune.
Squire
[A squire plays his trumpet as King Neptune and his daughter, Princess Mindy, sit down on their thrones. King Neptune bonks the squire's head with his trident]
Oh, right. The royal court is now in session. Bring the prisoner forward.
King Neptune
So, you have confessed to the crime of touching the king's crown?
Prisoner
Yes, but-
King Neptune
BUT WHAT?!
Prisoner
But it's my job, your highness. I'm the royal crown polisher.
King Neptune
Well then, I guess I can't execute you. 20 years in the dungeon, it is.
Daddy! You're free to go.
Crown polisher
Bless you, Princess Mindy. [He runs away.]
King Neptune
Mindy, how dare you defy me?
Why do you need to be very mean?
King Neptune
I am the king. I must enforce for the laws of the sea.
Father, I wish you'd try a little love and compassion instead of these harsh punishments.
Squire
That would be nice.
King Neptune
[bonks the squire with his trident again]
Squire! Clear the room. I wish to speak to my daughter alone. [Everyone else leaves.] What's this, Mindy?
Your crown?
King Neptune
And what does this crown do?
Covers your bald spot.
King Neptune
It's not bald, it's thinning. This crown does much more than cover a slightly receding hairline. No, this crown entitles the one who wears it to be in charge of the sea. One day, you will wear this crown.
I'm gonna be bald?
King Neptune
Thinning! Anyway, the point is, you won't wear it until you learn to rule with an iron fist, like your father.
Uh, Dad? Your "crown"?
King Neptune
What the? MY CROWN!!!! AHHHHHH! Someone has stolen the royal crown!
I got it! I got it!
$101 for a Krabby Patty?
With cheese, Mr. Squidward, with cheese.
King Neptune
[arriving and his squire blows his trumpet]
Greetings, subjects. I seek the one known as Eugene Krabs. May he present himself to me at once.
I am Eugene Krabs, Your Highness. Would you like to order somethin'?
King Neptune
NAY!!! I'm onto you, Krabs! You have stolen the royal crown, you cannot deny! For, clever as you are, you left one damning piece of evidence at the scene of the crime! [shows him a note]
"I stole your crown. Signed, EUGENE KRABS?!
King Neptune
Relinquish the royal crown to me AT ONCE!
B-But, this is crazy! I didn't do it!
Ahoy! This is Eugene Krabs! Leave a message.
[disguised voice, on the answering machine]
Hi, Mr. Krabs, this is Clay, the guy you sold Neptune's crown to? Yeah. I just wanted to say thanks again for sellin' me the crown. Neptune's crown. I sold it to a guy in Shell City and, uh, I just wanted to say thanks again for sellin' the crown. Neptune's crown. Which is now in Shell City. Goodbye.
King Neptune
MY CROWN IS IN THE FORBIDDEN SHELL CITY?! WAAAAAAHHHHHHHH!!! [Scene cuts to Plankton on the phone]
Plan Z, I love Plan Z.
King Neptune
WAAAAAAHHHHHHHH!!! Prepare to burn, Krabs! [lights his trident]
[sobs]
Wait, Neptune! Please, I'm beggin' ya! I ain't a crook! Ask anyone, they'll vouch for me!
King Neptune
Very well, then. [extinguishes his trident] Before I turn this conniving crustacean into fish-meal, who here has anything to say about Eugene Krabs?
SpongeBob, me boy, oh, you've come just in time. Please tell King Neptune all about me.
I have worked for Mr. Krabs for... [burps] many years and always thought he was a great boss.
You see? A great boss.
[off-screen]
I now realize that he's a great... big... jerk! [Mr. Krabs turns to SpongeBob] I deserved that manager's job! [grabs Mr. Krabs upsettingly] But you didn't give it to me, 'cause you say I'm a kid. Well, I am 100% man! And this... man... has got something to say to you. [takes a deep breath and blows a long raspberry] There, I think I've made my point.
King Neptune
[Mr. Krabs' pupils turn to King Neptune]
Anyone else? No? Well, then. [fires at Mr. Krabs, causing him to burn his butt]
[flies around the restaurant with his butt burning]
Ooh! Me pants are on fire! Me underwear's on fire! I'm on fire! [he dives into a bucket of water] Oh, yeah.
King Neptune
And now, Eugene Krabs, [prepares to blast Mr. Krabs again] you... will... [SpongeBob grips onto King Neptune's nose]
Wait! I'm flattered you would do this on my account, but being manager isn't worth killing Mr. Krabs over.
King Neptune
Quiet, fool! Mr. Krabs stole my crown, and now it's in Shell City. That's why he must die.
Doesn't it seem a little harsh to kill someone over a crown?
King Neptune
You don't understand! My crown is a symbol of my king like authority. And, uh, between you and me, my hair is thinning a bit.
Oh, your highness, I'm sure it's not that notice... Baaaald! Bald! Bald! Bald!
Crowd
Bald! Bald! Bald! Bald!
MY EYES!
King Neptune
Alright, alright.
Uh, King Neptune, sir? Would you spare Mr. Krabs' life if I went to get your crown back?
King Neptune
YOU, go to Shell City?! [laughs] No one who's gone to Shell City has ever returned! What makes you think you could? You're just a kid. [throws SpongeBob to the floor]
King Neptune
Run along. I have a crab to cook. [lights his trident]
No!
King Neptune
[sighs]
Very well, then. I'll have to fry you both!
[runs to the Krusty Krab to stop him]
Daddy, stop it! Can't you get through one day without executing someone?
King Neptune
Mindy? I told you to stay in the carriage!
Where's your love and compassion? [holds up SpongeBob] Look at this little guy! He's willing to risk his life to find your crown and save his boss.
King Neptune
But, daughter, I...
Please, Father, at least let him try... What have you got to lose? Might I remind you of your... special problem? [removes the paper bag, once again revealing the shiny bald spot]
All
Bald! Bald! Bald! Bald! Bald!
All
Bald!
King Neptune
Very well, Mindy. I'll give him a chance. But when your little champion fails to return, I get to splatter this crab all over the walls!
Huh?
King Neptune
[to SpongeBob]
And as for you, be back here with my crown in exactly ten days.
King Neptune
Eight.
Seven.
King Neptune
Six.
SpongeBob and Mr. Krabs
Patrick! [they tackle him]
King Neptune
Six it is, then.
Patrick, shush!
King Neptune
Until then, the crab shall remain frozen where he now stands.
No, wait, I'm beggin' ya! [King Neptune freezes him]
Who turned on the AC? Ah! Mr. Krabs! Oh, no, this is terrible! Who's gonna sign my paycheck?
King Neptune
Come along, Mindy.
[to SpongeBob and Patrick]
Listen, you guys, the road to Shell City is really dangerous. There's crooks, killers, and monsters everywhere! And what's worse, there's a giant Cyclops who guards the outskirts of the city, and preys on innocent sea creatures! Don't let him catch you, because if he does, he'll take you back to his lair, and you'll never be seen again!
She's pretty, SpongeBob.
Here, take this.
What's in here? [opens the bag and wind blows into his face]
It's a magical bag of winds. I stole them from my father.
You're hot.
Once you find the crown, open the bag of winds, and you'll be blown back home.
[Back on the surface, Hasselhoff, with SpongeBob, Patrick and the crown still on his back, zooms across the water like a speedboat. A fisherman startles as he falls off his boat after seeing Hasselhoff, who smile]
Hooray for Hasselhoff! Nothing can stop us now!
Huh? Unidentified object off the hindquarters.
It looks like... Bigger boot. But how? AAHH! DENNIS!
Did you miss me?
This is the best seat in the house. Alright, Neptune, let's get it on!
King Neptune
Eugene Krabs, your six day reprieve is up, and it is time for you to die.
Please, I didn't do it!
King Neptune
There is nothing else I can do.
You can give SpongeBob and Patrick a little more time.
King Neptune
Except give SpongeBob and Patrick a little more ti-ti-ti-ti-ti-ti-time---- WHAT? Mindy, will you butt out? I won't have you stalling this execution.
Stalling? I'm not stalling anything.
King Neptune
Yes, you are.
No, I'm not.
King Neptune
Yes, you are. You're doing it right now.
I'm stalling?
King Neptune
Yes.
Stalling?
King Neptune
Stalling!
Stalling.
King Neptune
Stalling!
Oh, boy.
Now, where were we?
Patrick, run!
No! I'm tired of running. If we run now, we'll never stop- [Dennis knocks him away] Run, SpongeBob!
Ahhhhhh! [He slides down David's rear, but Dennis stabs it with his knife]
Ooh! Take it easy back there, fellas.
SpongeBob, be careful!
Come on, kid, give it up. Dennis always gets his man.
NEVER!!!!!!!!!! [jumps to Hasselhoff's other leg] Yeah, I did it!
You got guts, kid. Too bad I gotta rip 'em outta ya.
Uh, I don't know what Plankton's paying you, but if you let us go, I can make it worth your while. [presents a stack of Goober Dollars]
Uh, that, sir, is 5 Goober Dollars. Legal tender at any participating Goofy Goober - [Dennis furiously grabs him by the shirt] I got bubbles. Fun at parties. [Blows them at Dennis's face]
My eyes!
I got you, SpongeBob!
Thanks, buddy. Yeah, thanks a lot.
[A boat horn honks, and Hasselhoff ducks under a catamaran. The boat knocks Dennis off him]
See ya.
No! No! No! Oh, SpongeBob, wherever you are, you better hurry.
[Back on the surface, Hasselhoff stops near Bikini Atoll Island]
OK, fellas, this is where you get off. Bikini Bottom is directly below.
But we'll never be able to float down in time.
Who said anything about floating?
Houston Voice
[As David stands up]
Initiating launch sequence.
What the...?
The control.
All hands on deck!
Houston Voice
[David places the crown with SpongeBob and Patrick on it between his pecs, then begins to squeeze them out.]
10 seconds to liftoff. 10, 9, 8...
[Cut back and forth between David and the Krusty Krab]
Eugene Krabs, the time has come... [lights his trident]
No.
Yes.
Houston Voice
...7, 6, 5...
...for you...
No.
Yes.
Houston Voice
...4, 3, 2...
King Neptune
...to fry.
No.
Yes.
Houston Voice
...1.
[David launches the crown into the water; SpongeBob and Patrick hold on to the crown zooming at high speed as they holler and speed right back to Bikini Bottom toward the Krusty Krab 2] [closes his eyes]
No!
[The duo crashes through the roof with the crown. Just as a ray of light is about to hit Krabs, the crown blocks it and deflects it upward through the ceiling, saving his life. The ray of light blasts up to the surface where Hasselhoff is]
You've done good, Hasselhoff. You've done... [the ray of light zaps him] Ow.
Hooray! We made it!
We made it!
My crown! My beautiful crown! [kisses it]
SpongeBob, Patrick? [hugs them] I knew you could do it!
Sorry to rain on your parade, Plankton.
Oh, don't worry about me. My parade shall be quite dry under my umbrella!
SpongeBob, Patrick Star, and Princess Mindy
Umbrella?
Other characters in The SpongeBob SquarePants Movie
SpongeBob SquarePants
Patrick Star
Bill Fagerbakke
Plankton
Mr. Lawrence
Princess Mindy
Scarlett Johansson
SpongeBob
Tom Kenny
Mr. Krabs
Clancy Brown
Squidward Tentacles
Rodger Bumpass
Dennis
Alec Baldwin
Neptune
Jeffrey Tambor
Captain Bart
Bart McCarthy
Fred
Hasselhoff
David Hasselhoff
Karen
Jill Talley
Mrs. Puff
Mary Jo Catlett
Sandy Cheeks
Carolyn Lawrence
Patrick Star
Bill Fagerbakke
Plankton
Mr. Lawrence
Princess Mindy
Scarlett Johansson
SpongeBob
Tom Kenny
Mr. Krabs
Clancy Brown
Squidward Tentacles
Rodger Bumpass
Dennis
Alec Baldwin
Neptune
Jeffrey Tambor
Captain Bart
Bart McCarthy
Fred
Hasselhoff
David Hasselhoff
Karen
Jill Talley
Mrs. Puff
Mary Jo Catlett
Sandy Cheeks
Carolyn Lawrence