[Lupin and the gang exit the manhole after the helicopter Goemon had slashed blows up]
I'm now officially NOT HAPPY!
Guys are no amateurs.
Lupin
Yasuo Yamada · 97 quotes
Jigen
Kiyoshi Kobayashi · 53 quotes
Inspector Zenigata
Gorō Naya · 42 quotes
Mamo
Kō Nishimura · 29 quotes
Fujiko
Eiko Masuyama · 28 quotes
Goemon
Makio Inoue · 24 quotes
Wolf
24 quotes
Dan Dunn
12 quotes
Detective Ed Scott
10 quotes
Egyptian Police Chief
Haruo Minami · 10 quotes
Gordon
Hidekatsu Shibata · 10 quotes
Mamaux
7 quotes
Margo
7 quotes
Don Samurai
6 quotes
Commissioner
Kosei Tomita · 5 quotes
Egyptian Police Officer
Yûji Mikimoto · 5 quotes
US President
Fujio Akatsuka · 5 quotes
Coroner
3 quotes
Gissinger
3 quotes
Secretary General
Ikki Kajiwara · 3 quotes
Most scenes together: Lupin & Jigen (31), Lupin & Mamo (20), Lupin & Fujiko (19)
Mystery of Mamo quotes
Page 10 of 12[Lupin finishes the dinner while Margo (Fujiko) sleeps]
Some fun! Some fun! After leading me into temptation like that! It's just too bad that I'm not Alain Delon! Oh, how disgusting. I didn't know that a girl like you was just all talk! [He finishes the food, then throws down the pan. He grabs a hatchet] I finished eating. Now's the time to appeal to my true violent nature. Here I come!
[He slashes at the door and breaks it down. He looks at Margo with a lecherous expression and bounds in, then jumps out of his underwear. As he goes in for the landing, he finds himself getting hazy. He lands face down on the ground beside Margo, completely naked] [gently shaking him]
Lupin! Lupin, get up! [She realizes she can't wake him up and holds up the medicine bottle] I didn't know that drug was so effective. [Lupin lets out a stertorous exhale. Margo gets out a transmitter from her bra and turns it on] Lupin, I'm doing all this for your sake, you know.
[Lupin finishes the food while Fujiko sleeps]
Typical! You all want to be the center of a guy's universe. But as soon as he actually acts like it, it's "Oh, I didn't mean like that. I mean, adoring me is fine, but wanting me's kind of icky." [He finishes the food and throws down the pan, grabbing a hatchet] Well... we can drivel about love vs. desire all night. But I think... we can both agree that you drive me crazy! [He slashes at Fujiko's door]
Lupin, what are you...? [Lupin breaks the door down completely and springs inside, laughing maniacally] Lupin, now just...! [Lupin throws off Fujiko's cover and jumps straight out of his underwear, diving up and over in an arc at Fujiko. As he goes in for the landing, he finds himself getting woozy. He lands on the ground beside Fujiko, completely nude. Fujiko gently shakes him] Lupin? Lupin! [She picks up a medicine bottle] I didn't know this stuff was so damn potent. [Lupin begins to snore softly. Fujiko gets out a transmitter from her bra and turns it on] This is all for your own good, lover.
[Lupin had just gotten out of the bathtub after his encounter with Fujiko goes supposedly awry]
Hm... ah, now that feels a lot better!
So if we'd done things my way to start with...
Hm?
Oh, what the hell, never mind!
Right. Don't forget that Lupin is a masochist, Jigen.
Come on. That's not true. I do not enjoy being made a fool of.
[Lupin had just gotten out of the bathtub after his encounter with Fujiko goes supposedly awry]
Yikes! She got me! I'm still dizzy.
Pretending to be a playboy? Serves you right! If we caught her right away, this trouble could've been avoided.
Lupin, work and women cannot co-exist peacefully.
You're too nit-picky. This is all part of my strategy. [puts on the headphones Jigen had given him as Jigen searches for the signal planted on the Philosopher's Stone]
You seem to have incredible brain power!
[Lupin had just gotten out of the bathtub after his encounter with Fujiko goes supposedly awry]
You know, deep down I think that woman is crazy about me.
Yeah, I'm sure that's why she double-crossed you. Good thing we double-crossed her first...
Lupin, the road to Hell is paved with pretty women.
What's the matter with you, Goemon? Did your mom drop you when you were a baby or something? [puts on the headphones Jigen had given him as Jigen searches for the signal planted on the Philosopher's Stone]
Shut up. I'm trying to pick up the transmitter's signal.
[Lupin had just gotten out of the bathtub after his encounter with Margo goes supposedly awry]
She sure floored me that time! I still feel a little dizzy...
Serves you right for being a playboy. If you had grabbed her in the beginning, we wouldn't have wasted our time!
Lupin, women and business are not compatible.
Stop trying to find fault with me! It was all calculated from the start! [puts on the headphones Dan Dunn had given him as Dunn searches for the signal planted on the Wiseman Stone]
Huh. What a fantastic brain.
[Lupin scrapes the leftovers from the pan while Fujiko sleeps]
Hmph! What the hell? You were seducing me mercilessly. I know I can't be Alain Delon, you know. Oh, how disgusting. I can't stomach that mushy mumbo jumbo. [He finishes the last of the food, throws down the pan and grabs a hatchet] Well, I'm done eating. Now I'll resort to more aggressive means!
[He slashes at Fujiko's bedroom door and breaks it down, then springs into her room, throws off cover and jumps straight out of his underwear, diving up and over in an arc at Fujiko. As he goes in for the landing, he finds himself getting woozy. He lands on the ground beside Fujiko, completely nude. Fujiko gently shakes him]
Lupin? Lupin! [She realizes he's fast asleep and picks up the medicine bottle] I didn't know this medicine was so strong. [She takes a transmitter out of her bra and turns it on] Lupin, this is all for your own good.
[Lupin scrapes the leftovers from the pan while Fujiko sleeps]
Oh, this is great. Just terrific! Acting like it's all my fault. 'Scuse me, lady, but you were the one who started it! "Oh, at last, we're all alone together, just you and me." What was I supposed to think, you wanted to play Chinese checkers? [He eats the last of the food, then throws the pan to the ground and grabs a hatchet] Finished dinner... Now I could use a little strawberry tart for dessert.
[He slashes at Fujiko's bedroom door and breaks it down. He jumps into Fujiko's room, giggling gleefully, and dives out of his underwear, into the air, in an arc at Fujiko. As he goes in for the landing, he finds himself getting woozy] Oh... dear.
[He lands on the ground beside Fujiko, completely nude]
Lupin? [She gently shakes him] Lupin! Oh, I hope I didn't give him too much. [She picks up a medicine bottle] Boy, these drops work even faster than I thought. [Lupin begins to snore softly] He'll never trust my cooking again.
[She gets out a transmitter from her bra and turns it on] [over the transmitter]
Fujiko, my lovely. Done so soon?
[Lupin, hidden behind a pillar, presents a rose for Fujiko, who gasps] [melodramatic, clears his throat]
My love is like a red, red rose!
Lupin!
What is this, English lit. 101?
[walks out to her, wearing a formal dress suit, clears his throat]
How like a rose thou art! Oh, your beauty dazzles my eyes! Your thorns pierce my heart! [smells the rose, changes back to his normal accent] And that stuff didn't come out of any book, by the way. I made that part up all by myself.
Don't give up your day job, okay? Shouldn't we get down to business?
Great. Now it's getting obscene.
I long to plant thee in my garden of love, water thee with my tears, and fertilize thee with my kisses, Fujiko!
Enough of the fertilizer, Lupin. Get that bud out of my face before I plant it.
So typical of the materialistic modern woman. [throws the rose away] All they want is expensive jewelry.
All I want is what we agreed to. [gasps] What are you babbling about? Did you find the gemstone?!
Does Santa Claus wear a red suit?
[Fujiko’s eyes widen as Lupin presents her the Philosopher’s Stone]
That's it, all right. Hand it over!
[Lupin yanks the Stone away from Fujiko] [tutting]
Fujiko! You cut me to the quick! I can't believe how unromantic you are! I mean, I risked my life to bring you this bauble, not to mention expenses! And what do I get in return for all my toil and trouble? "Hand it over." Tell me, who's the pebble for, anyway? I assume you're acting for someone else, right? So don't tell me. It doesn't really matter. The fact remains that your part of the bargain was to go on a date with me, remember?
Stop joking around, Lupin.
[walks out to her, wearing a formal dress suit]
Don't be so cruel. The sweet nighttime breeze in Paris may have melted this cold-hearted soul of mine. [smells the rose] I thought I had elegantly transformed myself this evening.
Oh, sweet-smelling flower. You are a rose.
You are old-fashioned.
The pain from your thorn is giving me pleasure, as well... because I love you.
Enough with your acting. Then why don't we close our deal?
That's pretty cold. [throws the rose away] Actually, you have too many thorns.
I'm in a hurry. [gasps] Or, Lupin, did you possibly...?
Don't be so hasty. Here it is.
[Lupin yanks the Stone away from Fujiko]
Hold it. Look how much more passion you show now! How disappointing. Disappointing. Really, really disappointing... I had to convince Jigen, and we endured so much to steal this. And look how you act. Or, Fujiko, are you gonna deal with someone else? Well, I promised not to ask why. So you need to keep your promise to go out with me.
Hm. What exactly is that supposed to mean?
[walks out to her, wearing a formal dress suit]
It means, my dear Fujiko, that you are a rose, and I have been pricked by the thorn of your indifference…
The thorn of my indifference? Oh, brother...
Yet, there is still one thing that could save me.
What might that be?
If your petal-like lips would but caress my own unworthy sad ones, I might yet survive, my love.
I would, but you know you’d just prick yourself all over again.
Boy, you’re all thorns. [throws the rose away] And after all I went through to get you that damn Stone!
Now, don’t try to make me feel all... [gasps] are you saying you actually did it, Lupin?!
Why, of course. Here you are.
[Lupin yanks the Stone away from Fujiko]
Hey! My God, look at you! You're not so indifferent right now, are you? I must say, I don't know why I bother. You know, Fujiko, at least I held up my end of the bargain. Well, didn't I? I got the thing for you, and no questions asked: like who you're in business with or anything, and what did I ask for in return? A little human consideration, just the pretense that you care about me; but apparently, it's too much to ask.
[walks out to her, wearing a formal dress suit]
You think I'm joking? The soft breeze of Paris must have melted my callous heart. [smells the rose] I thought I made myself extremely conspicuous tonight.
O, the fragrant flower! You are like a rose.
How old-fashioned!
Even the pain of thy thorns gives great pleasure... to the love in my heart. O Margo!
Enough of that stupid act. Let's get down to business now.
Can she be so hard?! [throws the rose away] You really do have a lot of thorns, don't you?
I am in a hurry. Or perhaps, Lupin, you mean...
Don't be hasty. Look here...
[Lupin yanks the Stone away from Margo]
Hold it! Ah-ah-ah! How come you got all enthusiastic so suddenly? Ah, life is a bore. How worthless and stupid it all is! Talking Dan Dunn into helping me, and going through all kinds of trouble to get it, and look at your attitude! Or maybe, Margo, you made some kind of a deal with somebody else for this? Well, the deal was not to ask you questions, but now you must keep your part of the deal and keep your date with me.
[Mamaux shows Lupin and Margo surveillance footage of Dan Dunn and Don Samurai] [chuckling]
I believe your friends have arrived.
Oh, it's them!
And one more person...
[Detective Scott, with a picture of Lupin, is shown questioning Laozi of his location]
Even the old shamus! [laughs] This is getting crazier and crazier!
The man who's entertaining him right now is an ancient Chinese philosopher.
You mean he’s paranoiac and thinks he is...
No, he's the real one!
You mean a real nut?
[Mamaux shows them images of the people he has cloned]
Listen carefully. It took me 10,000 years to collect them. Politics, religion, philosophy, art. I preserved the most brilliant men in history from every field, and right now they still exist here. Have you ever thought about the end of the world? Well, here's a prophecy: in but a few more days, the world will come to an end. Only those chosen by me will live... for eternity. Only... beautiful and superior things can obtain eternal life from me.
[apparently deep in thought]
Now I get it. So that's it... [chuckles, then laughs hysterically]
What's so funny?!
[still chuckling]
Oh, very artistic and original drama! I give you credit! The gift of eternal life, followed by the destruction of the world! Oh, that's very good!
Ah, how ignorant and stubborn he is! You see what I mean, Margo? This man does not have the type of brain that should live throughout eternity.
[Margo is put off by Mamaux's statement]
Margo, it will only be you who will have eternal life.
Well, if I can't be with Lupin, then I don't want it.
Margo!
Oh, I'd like to have eternal youth... but I don't want to stay around and see Lupin as a shrivelled-up old man.
[Mamo shows Lupin and Fujiko surveillance footage of Jigen and Goemon] [chuckling]
Friends of yours, Lupin?
Huh?!
How the hell did they get here?!
Ah, but wait. There's more!
[Inspector Zenigata, with a picture of Lupin, is shown questioning Laozi of his location]
Zenigata! [laughs] He always said he'd follow me into the depths of Hell!
Look. He’s interrogating Laozi, the great ancient philosopher.
Or some fruitcake who thinks he's Laozi...
It is Laozi!
Okeydokey!
[Mamo shows them images of the people he has cloned]
Laugh if you will, but this is the work of 10,000 years. A masterwork, if I say so myself. The leading lights of science, philosophy, art. All under one roof, and all are perfectly real!
Hm! So, sort of a Noah's Ark?
Let's just say that if you've never given any thought about the world, starting now would either be a particularly good idea, or a pathetically pointless one, if you catch my drift, Mr. Lupin.
Uh?!
Because the time is nigh, Mr. Lupin, but sadly the guest list is... quite short. Only the elite of history's most brilliant and beautiful people!
[apparently deep in thought]
Oh, uh... I'm sorry to hear that. [chuckles, then laughs hysterically]
I imagine you are.
[still laughing]
No, I mean, it's just after all that work – an ugly, demented gnome like you isn't even eligible!
Huh. Quite annoying. That's exactly what I’m talking about, my dear Fujiko. Obviously, eternal life would be wasted on a vulgarian like that man there.
He's not even in our class. In fact, he's barely in our species!
Well, if Lupin can't come along, I'm not interested.
Fujiko!
No, Mamo. I'm sorry.
Hm?!
He's hard enough to take now. Imagine him all grumpy and flabby!