A character in Mystery of Mamo (1978)

Gordon quotes from Mystery of Mamo (1978)

Hidekatsu Shibata

Tied for 9th most-quoted character in Mystery of Mamo (1978): in 10 of its 166 quotes
Most scenes with: Jigen (8), US President (5), Mamo (4)

Scenes with Gordon

10 scenes
[threatening Gordon]

Is your name Flichin, the dangling penis?

Gordon

No, it's not. It's Gordon. You're Mr. Jigen, aren't you?

Don't say my name so casually. Why have you been sneaking around?

[American soldiers surround Jigen and reveal they have apprehended Goemon]

Goemon.

Gordon
[takes Jigen's gun]

Yes. Behave yourself and come with us.

This is the respected U.S. Navy?

Unforgivable. This is way too unreal.

It might be us who are unreal.

Gordon

Stand up! Here is Special Assistant to the President, Mr. Stuckey. [he presses a button, drawing down automated blinds]

What did he say?

He said... this is the guy who is manipulating the highest ranking top-dog in the world. Or so he says. [Gordon plays a taped recording of a conversation between US President Jimmy Carter and the Secretary General]

Mr. President, are the organizations of your country under control? I was blackmailed.

Secretary General...

Our orders are to provide all scientific data in the area of biochemistry, cytology and biogenetics. If we refuse, they will attack us with nuclear missiles.

I was blackmailed the same way. We have proof that he's not bluffing. Some of our communication satellites have been destroyed.

That is of no concern, as long as it's not caught.

I know that.

Then that guy?

That's right. It is I, Mamo... [Stuckey stops the tape]

Stuckey

No explanation is needed regarding the two men conversing. What we want to know is who the mysterious blackmailer is who broke into the secure-line conversation. [he rewinds part of the tape, and continues playing]

It is I, Mamo, the highest intelligence on Earth. A prophet... Or you can call me God.

God? Are you insane?

Someone claiming to be God making such a strange request?

Request? This is an order. You would both understand if you knew how the world was made. [Gordon stops the tape]

Keep going.

Stuckey

The rest is classified. In any case, we find that his threat is not a bluff.

Is that so? [lights a cigarette] Well, this does not concern us.

Stuckey

That's not true. What Mamo is requesting was stolen by Lupin. Let me get to the point. Where is Mamo's home base?

I have no idea.

Gordon

Keeping secrets won't do you any good. You were always with Lupin. [Jigen hands him Fujiko's clue to Lupin’s whereabouts] What's this?

It's a clue on Lupin. Handwritten by the woman who has been deceiving him. It says "water," right?

Gordon

What is this about?

If we knew, we wouldn't be here now.

Gordon
[frustrated, he turns over the table, knocking Stuckey and Jigen backwards]

Don't talk rubbish! [grabs Jigen by his shirt] There are many ways to torture you!

Is this what you call "democracy"? If that's the case, let me tell you something.

Gordon

What's that?

I used to be a fan of Monroe and Humphrey Bogart, but not anymore!

Gordon

You bastard!

Stuckey

Gordon. Looks like they really don't know anything. [whispers to Gordon, who opens a door] We will approach this from a different angle. You will be released immediately.

Gordon

You'd better appreciate this democracy! [closes the door]

[straightening his jacket]

Hmph. I don't need to change my mind now.

[threatening Gordon]

And you must be the one called Flintstone?

Gordon

No, you're wrong. My name is Gordon. You must be Dan Dunn?

Don't bandy my name about! And what do you want, tailing me like this?

[American soldiers surround Dan Dunn and reveal they have apprehended Don Samurai]

Don Samurai?

Gordon
[takes Dan Dunn's gun]

Well, you'd better come quietly.

So, this is the genuine American navy?

It's stupid. This is too unrealistic.

You and me are the things that are unrealistic.

Gordon

Stand up! Special Presidential Aide, Mr. Gissinger! [he presses a button, drawing down automated blinds]

What did he say?

He said... this guy's the mastermind for the biggest man in the world! [Gordon plays a taped recording of a conversation between US President Jimmy Carter and the Secretary General]

Mr. President. Do you really have good control of your government? Do you realize I'm being blackmailed?

Blackmailed?

I am to supply all secret technical data on biochemistry, cytology, gene technology... and if I refuse, they’ll attack with an atomic missile.

I've been threatened the same way. And to prove that they really mean it, they've already destroyed several of our communication satellites!

I must remind you that it has nothing to do with us.

I do realize it.

Then, do you think that man is...?

Mamaux

That's right. It is I, Mamaux! [Gissinger stops the tape]

It is not necessary to explain to you who these people are. We are interested only in the blackmailer who broke in on the hotline… when they were having a secret conversation. [he rewinds part of the tape, and continues playing]

Mamaux

That's right. It is I, Mamaux! The greatest brain in the world. A prophet... or you may call me God!

God?! You must be insane!

For one who calls himself God, your requests are pretty weird...

Mamaux

Requests? This is an order. If you really know what is going on in the world right now, you should know better than this. [Gordon stops the tape]

Let's hear the rest.

Hm? That's enough. The rest is much too sensitive. We are positive that this man really means what he says.

Is that right? [lights a cigarette] Well, anyway... it's got nothing to do with us.

Ah, but it does. Most of the things that Mamaux demands from us was stolen by that man Lupin. The bottom line: we want to know where Mamaux is!

I have no idea at all.

Gordon

Your hiding won't do you any good! You men have always been working together with that thief Lupin! [Dan hands him Margo’s clue to Lupin’s whereabouts] What is this?

A clue to find Lupin. It’s written by Lupin's double-crossing girlfriend, and it reads "water".

Gordon

What does that mean?

If I knew that, neither of us'd be here!

Gordon
[frustrated, he turns over the table, knocking Gissinger and Dan Dunn backwards]

Stop kidding me! [grabs Dan by his shirt] There are many ways that we can torture you!

Is that the way you operate democracy?! Well, then, I've got news for you!

Gordon

What news?

I was a fan of Marilyn Monroe and Humphrey Bogart... but not anymore!

Gordon

Why, you...!

Gordon! These two, they know nothing. [whispers to Gordon, who opens a door] We will approach this problem from a different angle. You will be released immediately.

Gordon

Be grateful to democracy! [closes the door]

[straightening his jacket]

Hm... I didn't have to give up Humphrey Bogart!

[threatening Gordon]

Sorry. I don't mean to be rude, but I got this thing about being followed.

Gordon

I'm Special Agent Gordon, and I'm warning you, Jigen, take it easy; you're in way over your head.

[sarcastically]

Really? You don't say? Aww.

[American soldiers surround Jigen and reveal they have apprehended Goemon]

On the other hand...

Gordon
[takes Jigen's gun]

Yeah. People are waiting; we don't want to be late.

All this just to bag the two of us. Boy, with the Cold War over, things must be pretty slow.

We can thank Lupin for getting us into this.

Life'd sure be dull without him, wouldn't it?

Gordon

Stand up! You're in the presence of a very important government official! [he presses a button, drawing down automated blinds]

I stand for no one.

Me neither, not even for Heinrich Gissinger, Special Adviser to--and the brains behind--the President of the United States. [Gordon plays a taped recording of a conversation between US President Bill Clinton and Russian President Boris Yeltsin]

Boris

Mr. President, my country's being blackmailed. I hope your government is not at fault.

Now calm down, Boris. That's ridiculous.

Boris

Whoever it is demands that we hand over all of our secret scientific data on cryogenics and gene splicing. If we do not, he threatens to attack us with nuclear warheads!

Well, he's not one of ours. We've been threatened the same way. In fact, he's already knocked out two of our communication satellites!

Boris

You do not think that we...

No, no. The Cold War's over, after all. Isn't it, Boris?

Boris

Oh... why, yes it is. Of course! But who is this madman?

If I may, gentlemen... I am Mamo. [Gissinger stops the tape]

The first two voices will remain unidentified. They are of no concern. What we want is the identity of the man who broke in on their top-secret conversation... this blackmailer who calls himself "Mamo". [he fast-forwards part of the tape, and continues playing]

That's right – Mamo. Some have called me a prophet; others, a God.

Boris

That is lunacy!

That's an understatement. You can't believe that we'll go along with this.

You have no choice! I know every move you make before you know it yourselves. Why, I even know about that little floozy you keep in the steno pool, Mr. President. How would you like the world to find out about her?

Oh... how dare you!

Boris

Floozy? What is this floozy? [Gordon stops the tape]

Aw... just when it was gettin' good.

The rest of it is immaterial. All that matters is reason to believe that this Mamo character is quite serious in his intentions.

No kiddin'. [lights a cigarette] You haven’t said... what any of this has to do with us.

Don’t be silly. We know your friend Lupin stole some objects at this fellow's request, and that you were with him when he did. Now, then... tell me everything you know about this Mamo person!

Hey, you guys know more about him than I do.

Gordon

Okay, stop playing games, ya lousy beatnik! We know you're in this with Lupin up to your necks, so start coming clean! [Jigen hands him Fujiko's clue to Lupin's whereabouts] Hm? What the hell's this?

It's a clue, Sherlock. His double-crossing girlfriend wrote it and dropped it out of a plane. It says "water".

Gordon
[annoyed]

Yeah, I can read.

I'm impressed. You're clearly overqualified for your job. Next, they'll be hiring guys who can think...

Gordon
[Growling angrily, he turns over the table, knocking Gissinger and Jigen backwards. He grabs Jigen by his shirt]

Listen! We have ways of getting you to talk!

Is this the way the US Government treats folks?! Well, I got news for you, Charlie!

Gordon

Yeah?! What's that?

I've always believed in my patriotic duty to buy US savings bonds, but I never will again!

Gordon

You pencil-necked little pisshead!

Gordon! It is obvious that these two know nothing. [mutters with Gordon, who opens a door] It appears we shall have to approach this problem from a different angle. In the meantime, gentlemen, you are both free to go.

Gordon

You two clowns better watch your step! [closes the door]

[straightening his jacket]

Yeah. Right back atcha, ya big ape.

[threatening Gordon]

You ain't called Flinch, by any chance?

Gordon

You think that name would suit me, riff? Gordon's more my style, but I don't think Jigen's really yours.

Hey, watch your mouth! I'm kinda used to Jigen!

[American soldiers surround Jigen and reveal they have apprehended Goemon]

Hi there, guys.

Gordon
[takes Jigen's gun]

That's right, so don't give us any trouble, OK?

So, this is how Uncle Sam keeps the world safe for democracy.

All military might is an illusion.

Well, those planes look pretty real to me.

Gordon

Attention! This is Special Presidential Adviser, Mr. Gissinger. [he presses a button, drawing down automated blinds]

What's special about him?

Have you heard his accent? Apart from that, he masterminds the world's number-one big bang show. [Gordon plays a taped recording of a conversation between the US President and the Secretary General]

Mr. President. I want your assurance that the CIA is not responsible – I am being blackmailed.

Eh, how's that, Mr. Secretary?

I am to hand over all secret technical data on biochemistry, cytology and gene technology. If I refuse, my country will suffer a nuclear attack!

Hey, I've been threatened the same way. And to prove they're serious, they’ve already destroyed several of our communication satellites.

Well, it was not us, Mr. President.

I know that, Mr. Secretary. You couldn't hit one of our satellites if you tried.

Now, wait! Only...

Choke on your borscht. The important thing is – to find out who's behind this.

I shall tell you. It is I, Mamo. [Gissinger stops the tape]

I cannot reveal who the first voices we heard belong to, but it's the third voice, which is obviously the blackmailer's, that I am interested in, who broke in on this secure hotline conversation. [he rewinds part of the tape, and continues playing]

I shall tell you. It is I, Mamo. The greatest intellect in the history of the world. Some call me a prophet; you may address me as God.

God?! You must be insane!

Eh, if you're God, I gotta tell you, your requests are pretty unoriginal, not to say, venial.

Request? I'm giving you and order! And if you care about mainstream, cherry pie and Dynasty as you always say, you'll jump to it! [Gordon stops the tape]

Go on.

No. You do not have security clearance A-14, without which the material is too sensitive to be communicated to you at this moment in time.

That's tough. [lights a cigarette] But I don’t see... where the two of us come in.

Mamo's established positive links with the criminal named "Wolf", an associate of yours. I need him. He will lead me to this imposter who pretends to be God!

Hey, I wish I could help you, only...

Gordon

Grr... I’m not putting up with crap like that! We got information which says you and Wolf have been partners for years! [Jigen hands him Fujiko’s clue to Wolf’s whereabouts] So, what’s this?

That's for you guys to work out. It was written by Wolf's double-crossing girlfriend. Nothing else I can tell you.

Gordon

Water's all it says...

Boy, if you're that on the ball, you'll solve this case in no time!

Gordon
[frustrated, he turns over the table, knocking Gissinger and Jigen backwards]

Don't mess me around! [grabs Jigen by his shirt] Listen! We got ways of making you talk.

C’mon, riff, shouldn’t that be his line? If this is democracy, I've had it.

Gordon

Huh? Not yet.

I used to be a great Bogie fan, and Elvis, Dean and Marilyn... but now, I resign!

Gordon

So, you really are anti-American...!

Gordon! Restrain your quite mental outrage. [whispers to Gordon] Let's use a more subtle psychological approach. [Gordon opens a door] We are convinced you are telling the truth and that you know nothing. We have therefore decided that we will let you go.

Gordon

God bless America and democracy! [closes the door]

[straightening his jacket]

This means I needn't give up Bogie!

[threatening Gordon]

You're not my type, so just take off.

Gordon

Listen! Just hear me out! My name's Gordon, yours is Jigen, isn't that right?

Yeah? So what, huh? Hm?

[American soldiers surround Jigen and reveal they have apprehended Goemon]

What the...? Goemon?!

Gordon
[takes Jigen's gun]

That's right. Just relax and come along with me.

US Navy. They weren’t kiddin'.

Outrageous. They cannot do this to us.

You don't read the newspapers very much, do ya?

Gordon

Stand up... now! This man is the Special Assistant to the President! [he presses a button, drawing down automated blinds] I said, stand!

Yes, we heard you.

Look. You guys went to a lot of trouble to get us here. Now why don't we just cut the crap, and get to the point? [Gordon plays a taped recording of a conversation between US President George W. Bush and Russian Premier Vladimir Putin]

Gordon
[clears his throat]

Yes, well...

Russian Premier

Mr. President, I must protest, in the strongest possible terms, the blackmailing of my administration by yours.

Mr. Premier, I'm afraid I don't...

Russian Premier

Please, don't insult us further. We've been threatened with nuclear attack if we don’t hand over all classified research in biochemistry, cytology and biogenetics.

Mr. Premier, we just lost two communications satellites after receiving similar demands, and frankly, the capability for such a strike...

Russian Premier

Mr. President, surely you're not accusing us?

Mr. Premier, I don't know what to think.

Russian Premier

What has your intelligence turned out?

Gentlemen, if I may interrupt...

Who's that?!

My name is Mamo. [Starky stops the tape]

Starky

Now...

Yeah?

Starky

The identification of that third voice is a matter of the utmost importance. Not only to this administration, but to the entire world. Please, listen carefully now. [he rewinds part of the tape, and continues playing]

My name is Mamo. I am the living embodiment of intelligence. A prophet... a God to you.

Russian Premier

You’re a madman!

He’s a terrorist! Whoever he is, what kind of a God threatens humanity with universal apocalypse if he doesn’t get his way?!

I heard you weren’t much of a student in your school days, Mr. President... but apparently, even the Bible you thump so shamelessly is the Reader’s Digest edition. [Gordon stops the tape]

Is that it?

Starky

The rest is classified. But, as you heard the President himself confirm, this terrorist, whoever he is, clearly has the capacity to carry out his deadly threats.

"Mamo"? [lights a cigarette] You just heard him. So what have you got on him, anyway?

Starky

Very little, apart from the fact that your friend, Mr. Lupin, appears to have been running some errands for him lately... which is where you come in. Tell us the location of Mamo's operation!

Hey, how in the hell should we know?

Gordon

Well... I'd suggest you think very hard! We're able to lock people up without a trial these days, you know! [Jigen hands him Fujiko’s clue to Lupin’s whereabouts] Hm? What the hell is this?!

Here's all I've got for ya. Broad who's been playing him dropped it from a plane. It's her handwriting.

Gordon

And what does this mean?

It means you're not completely clueless anymore.

Gordon
[frustrated, he turns over the table, knocking Starky and Jigen backwards]

Mess with me... [grabs Jigen by his shirt] aaannd... you're messing with America!

Oh yeah? Is that so? And which America would that be, exactly?!

Gordon

Huh? Which one?

Yeah. The beacon of freedom and democracy, or the bastion of... blind arrogance?!

Gordon

You... Democrat...!

Starky

Gordon. I believe him. [whispers to Gordon] I suggest we check our other leads. [Gordon opens a door] Your country thanks you for your cooperation, Mr. Jigen. We will be in touch if we require anything further.

Gordon

You keep your nose clean in the meantime! [closes the door]

[straightening his jacket]

Hm! Call me a Democrat, will ya?

Other characters in Mystery of Mamo