It's not really something you should be ashamed of. It happens to most men occasionally. You're probably under a lot of pressure.
He's not under pressure. He's not attracted to me because I'm just a pigeon! He's a self-hating pigeon!
Male Pigeon Oh, th-that is not true.
Ask him what he does all day. Go ahead, ask him.
Male Pigeon I sit in a tree by myself.
It's because he's too good to eat with the rest of us when the old people feed us in the park.
And the way he stares at a robin's breast? It's enough to make you sick!
Male Pigeon They're orange! I happen to be attracted to orange breasts, they're orange--
You're not a robin! You're not a dove or a hawk! You're a pigeon, and I'm a pigeon...
Male Pigeon [over her]
I'm sorry, she sits on that nest all day long, and she just gets a little crazy...
[over him]
...and I've been sitting on a nest with three eggs, and they're gonna be pigeons too! [flies away]
Male Pigeon But may I ask you something? If I turn this way, don't I look a little like a blue jay?
Diane, please call down to radiology and get me the x-rays on Mr. Galvin. Also, check with Mrs. Rivers and see if she can switch her appointment to 3:15. I may need to call in Gene for a consultation.
Gene, can you check your schedule and see if you can do a 3.15 consult?
Good. And Mark, did you get back the tests on Mr Freeman?
I think they're coming in this afternoon, Johnny.
Good. Keep me informed, okay?
Male Pigeon Hey, Doc, do you think I should get my beak done?
Male Pigeon Hey!
Call somebody from maintenance we need to put some for permanent screens up, or set some traps. This is a doctor's office, not a zoo.
He's back. We're gonna be rich.
[Jacob snoring]
Psst! Wake up!
Oh! Hey, Doc. You came back.
You need help. I want you to take some for tests.
Tests? That's good, right? Tests?
Ohh, I hate these stairs.
BT Baby Tiger
Take good care of him, Doc. He's our star.
Wait a minute. The dog gets to ride up front?
Hey, could you stop looking at me like I'm a side dish?
Oh, don't flatter yourself.
Now, you two guys shut up. Quiet.
Can you keep your voice down?
He's a big fan. Hey, Jerry! How you doing, dude? Just going for some tests.
SG Security Guard
Hey, hey, hey!
I'm fine! "The tiger's fine." I'm not sick.
SG Security Guard
Stop the car!
Male Pigeon I told you they'd get away.
Male Pigeon No thanks to me? Three armed guards versus a pigeon? That's a fair fight?
Don't throw that away. That's the marrow. It's the best part of the bone.
Well, if it isn't Siegfried and Roy.
Keep it quiet. Lucky, keep an eye out. You rats help him.
Hey, we don't work for you.
Give me a break. I saved your life.
That's yesterday's news. Take a hike.
[rats laughing]
You want gratitude? Get a hamster.
"Get a hamster." You kill me! Get a hamster!
P Policeman
Yeah, I got a plate I.D. on the catnapper.
Male Pigeon The heart of a hawk. The heart of a hawk. The heart of a hawk.
Male Pigeon The heart of a hawk! Aah!
[sings]
I Feel good! Na, na, na, na. Like I knew that I would! That feels good. Ohh!
P Policeman
[police car sirens]
What the hell is this?
P Pig
No more bacon. No more chops.
One, two, three, four. You ain't getting through this door. No justice, no peace.
Fur is murder. Free Willy.
Male Pigeon Pigs go home. Pigs go home. Pigs go home.
Male Pigeon No, no, not you. The police.
Wow, this is great. Are you okay?
Male Pigeon The man's coming down hard, but we're holding strong.
Male Pigeon Really?
I'm gonna give you a local. It's not gonna hurt. It'll feel like a little bee sting.
A little pressure. That's about it. Okay? Here I come.
He can't do this. He still thinks he can talk to animals.
He can, Lisa. He can talk to animals. It all started when he was a kid. I didn't know what to do.
What are you saying, Dad?
I thought it was a handicap, but it's a gift, Lisa. Don't you believe it? Look, look, look. See for yourself.
I need you to stay alert and tell me if you feel any numbness in your paws or on down your right side.
Have you ever done this operation before?
Oh, yeah, once in medical school, but it was to a cadaver. But my professor told me I did such good job that had my patient not been dead, he would've lived.
R Reporter
It's like Noah's ark out here. It truly is a remarkable sight. This odd collection of animals has actually prevented San Francisco's finest from entering the building. Which is apparently where the stolen tiger is being held.
He's a lunatic. He has a history of mental illness. He's frankly...
He's the most remarkable surgeon I have ever seen.
He's here to stay. He is the straw that stirs the drink.
I want exclusive rights to him.
He's dynamic, caring-- I can't imagine-- What's the matter?
Dolittle. Wonderful work, Doctor.
Bravo. Bravo, Johnny. I'm so inspired.
Welcome aboard. I feel like I've bought myself a winning franchise.
You haven't bought anything. We're not for sale.
Look. We don't need these namby-pamby wacko freaks. It's you and me, straight to the top.
Male Pigeon You want pigeon? I'll show you pigeon.
[Calloway laughing]
Aah! [spits]
Male Pigeon Are you happy now?
Uh.
[John chuckles, cooing]
