Chazz Palminteri movie quotes

View Quote This water's damn cold! I can't believe this! Beaten by a mouse and his pet cat! What could be worse?! [Smokey runs off into the distance when a pack of wild dogs begin to chase him] Nice doggie! NO! NOOO!

View Quote How you doing? You must be Stuart.

View Quote That's not funny. THAT'S SICK! A cat can't have a rodent as a master. I mean, what's this world coming to? IT'S AGAINST THE LAWS OF NATURE! Word of this gets out, it'll be bad for cats all over.

View Quote We've been "mushed".

View Quote Mickey Mantle? Is that what you're upset about? Mickey Mantle makes $100,000 a year. How much does your father make? You don't know? Well, see, if your father can't pay the rent, go ask Mickey Mantle and see what he tells you. Mickey Mantle don't care about you, so why should you care about him? Nobody cares.

View Quote [last words before he died] Come here!

View Quote First day on the job, you know what I learned? How to spot a murderer.

View Quote Convince me, and tell me every last detail.

View Quote I'm smarter than you, and I'm going to find out what I want to know, and I'm going to get it from you whether you like it or not.

View Quote Coolidge: [trying to thread a projector] Damn it! I can't get my finger in there. It won't fit.
Esther: Try your dick.

View Quote Coolidge: [riding in the car] You know, I've been thinking, why is it we always sit in the same place? And why is it you're always the one that drives, Max?
Hoover: I guess it's 'cause I got the keys.

View Quote Hoover: Let me tell ya how it goes, Elleroy. Ya meet somebody. Maybe they're a little off-center, but they tell ya the truth, and ya like 'em — ya like 'em for that. And one thing leads to another, and ya end up in bed. Now that's weak, Elleroy.
Coolidge: Max…
Hoover: Now listen to me! Nobody gets hurt. Now, you go home, and you see your wife, and you're feelin' bad. Ya wanna unload it, ya wanna get it off your chest. So you tell 'er. And now she's hurt. Now that's weak, too, Elleroy. But it's also cruel. It's just goddam cruel.
[Hoover turns from Coolidge, but turns back again.]
Hoover: Take a— here, here's something for ya. Here's something that doesn't cost ya twenty-five bucks an hour. You carry your own water, Elleroy. Ya understand? Carry your own water.

View Quote Primo: Everybody knows there's been this thing between me and Paul Vitti for a long time.
Dr. Ben Sobel: Which thing are you talking about? The first thing or the second thing?
Primo: What second thing? I only know one thing.
Dr. Ben Sobel: Hey, how can we bring up the first thing if we're not gonna talk about the second thing. Did you talk to the guy?
Primo: What guy?
Dr. Ben Sobel: The guy with the thing!
Primo: What thing? What the **** are you talking about?
Dr. Ben Sobel: How should I know? You brought it up.

View Quote [Vitti is trying to forgive Primo for attempting to whack him.]
Boss Paul Vitti: And hopefully, hopefully... if you make one more move on me, you mother****er, I'll ****in' cut your ****in' balls off and shove 'em up your ****in' ass. I'll ****in' bury you! I'll stick **** ice picks in your eyes. I'll chop your **** eyeballs and I'll send 'em to your family so they can eat them for dessert! Do you understand me?!
Primo: Hey, Paul.
Boss Paul Vitti: What?
Primo: **** you.
Boss Paul Vitti: (throws down phone) You mother****er!

View Quote [Vitti is trying to forgive Primo for attempting to whack him.]
Primo: Yeah, who is this?
Boss Paul Vitti: It's me.
Primo: Me who?
Boss Paul Vitti: Me. Me.
Primo: Me? Me who?
Boss Paul Vitti: Me. You know me. Me.
Primo: Yeah, how's it goin'?
Boss Paul Vitti: Not good. Not good. Whoever did that thing to you-know-who, that good friend of mine? They're trying to do that to me now, and I'm having a lot of feelings about that, and I'm trying to get some... some...
Dr. Ben Sobel: Closure.
Boss Paul Vitti: ...closure on that.
Primo: What kind of feelings?
Boss Paul Vitti: I'm feeling very angry about that, I'm really- I'm enraged. I'm feeling very very mad about that.
Primo: Yeah, so why are you telling me?
Boss Paul Vitti: Why'm I telling you? Like you don't know nothin' about it? Eh?
[Dr. Sobel gestures hurriedly for Vitti to be calm and slow down]
Primo: I don't know what you're talkin' about.
Boss Paul Vitti: You don't know nothin'? What?
Primo: I don't know what you're talkin' about.
Boss Paul Vitti: Okay, whatever, I'm just trying to... tell you about my feelings, and that I'm angry, and that that anger is...
Dr. Ben Sobel: A blocked wish.
Boss Paul Vitti: A blocked wish, and I'm looking forward to seeing you, next week at that thing, and unblock that angered wish, and then, hopefully, hopefully... (I warn you,) [losing his temper] if you make one more move on me, you mother****er, I'll **** cut your **** balls off, I'll shove them up your **** ass! I'll **** bury you! I'll put **** ice picks in your (****) eyes! I'll chop your **** eyeballs (off)! I'll send them to your **** family so they can eat them for dessert! Do you understand me?!
Primo: Hey, Paul.
Boss Paul Vitti: What?
Primo: **** you. [hangs up]
Boss Paul Vitti: (throws down phone) You mother****er!
[In his office, Primo looks at one of his men]
Primo: You get a dictionary and find out what this "closure" is. If that's what he's gonna hit us with, then I wanna know what it is.

View Quote Walken: What the hell's going on here? That ain't no baby. Who else is here?
Darryl: Nobody.
Walken: Who's here?!
Darryl: Nobody, I swear.
Walken: Come on, inside, inside. There's the little monster. What does he got there?
Darryl: It's an airplane.
Walken: Tell him to get rid of the plane. Get rid of it!
Darryl: Calvin, throw the plane. [Calvin throws the plane and both Darryl and Calvin stay still]
Walken: What are you doing? [Calvin and Darryl point the airplane at him and the plane hits his groin and he falls to the ground on his knees]
Darryl: Don't move!
Walken: [laughs] Save it, tough guy. You're not gonna shoot me.
Calvin: But I will.
Cop 1: Freeze, police!
Cop 2: Freeze, police!
Cop 1: I got this. You, check the house. Black cops, come with me. White lady, you stay here.
Walken: I'm telling you, guys, that ain't no baby. He's a mastermind behind the whole thing.
Cop 1: Get him outta here.
Walken: He's a stone-cold killer, that kid.
Roscoe: Would you get this thing off me?!
Cop 2: Relax. Where you're going, you might wanna keep that on.
Bruno: I don't wanna go to jail. It's too dark. There's no TV.

View Quote Walken: Say, is this the guy who double-crossed Percy?
Roscoe: Yeah, that's the guy, boss.
Darryl: Listen, I don't know anyone named Percy. You must have gotten the wrong guy.
Walken: Cut the crap. I want my diamond.
Darryl: I don't have it.
Walken: Well, that's too bad. I guess we're just gonna have to beat it out of you.
Darryl: I just called the cops, and they're on their way over here.
Walken: Really? That doesn't leave us much time then. [to thugs] Take him.
Darryl: Wait, wait, wait, guys.
Calvin: Dada. Dada.
Walken: Who's this little guy?
Darryl: That's my son.
Walken: Take him upstairs. I wanna talk to you.
Roscoe: Cute kid.
Darryl: It's just that... I don't have... Ow! Ow! Hey, that's my nipple!

View Quote Walken: Now tell me, where's my diamond?
Darryl: I already told you, I don't have it.
Walken: You don't tell me where my diamond is, that cute little baby of yours is gonna get hurt. [Bruno falls down the stairs, screaming] Moron, get the kid! Get the kid. I want him.
Roscoe: Ah, there you are! Come on, buddy. Come to Uncle Roscoe. Uh-uh. Okay, now, play nicey-nicey. [Calvin whacks Roscoe with a golf club, and Roscoe falls down the stairs and breaks his shades]