The Super Mario Bros. Movie 2023 quotes, page 2

Donkey Kong

I'm D.K.! I'm Donkey Kong!

Yeah! We love you!

Donkey Kong

Oh, yeah! [waves at his father] Hi, Dad! Hi!

Cranky Kong

No. No! Don't do that!

Donkey Kong

Dad, wave back!

Cranky Kong

Enough with the showboating!

Donkey Kong

What do ya mean?! They like it! It's what they came here for! Dancin' pecs! [flexes his chest]

Cranky Kong

Okay, simmer down! [the crowd still cheers] I said, "Simmer down!" [the crowd stops cheering]

D.K.! D.K.! D.K.! D.K.!

Cranky Kong

That means you, Diddy Kong!

D.- [sits down] Sorry.

Cranky Kong

Now, since I want this fight to last more than five seconds, I put power-ups around the arena. You're welcome, Mario!

Donkey Kong

I don't anything special to break every bone in your tiny body!

Bowser

Mario! [Mario runs to the Star, but Bowser jumps in his way] You want this? [they fight] You ruined my wedding! [throwing things; Mario dodges] I was finally gonna be happy! [throws Mario at the car] Now you will suffer...LIKE ME! [throws a car at Mario, but he dodges and runs. Then Bowser chases Mario and whips him with this tail, sending him flying into Punch-Out! Pizzeria. Then he hides from Bowser] You thought you could stop me? You worthless, weak, little nothing. COME OUT AND FIGHT! Or are you too scared?! [Mario doesn't answer; arrogantly chuckles] Just when I thought.

Council, your attention. Bowser has found the Super Star, and is headed toward our kingdom. Its power will make him invincible. We will be destroyed.

Princess, what are we gonna do?!

[Princess Peach

I will not let him hurt you. [ascending from the stairs] We are going to stop Bowser.

How? Look at us. We're adorable! [he and the others widen their eyes]

Peach

I'm going to convince the Great Kong Army to help us. Together, we'll annihilate that monster.

Their mad king doesn't make alliances. The Kongs will never agree.

Peach

I can convince him. I'll leave for the Jungle Kingdom in the morning. [leaves]

Good luck, Princess. For all our sakes.

Donkey Kong

So, this is the end; being slowly digested by an eel next to an idiot in overalls.

Mario

Well, at least your brother isn't gonna die because of you.

Donkey Kong

At least you're not gonna die with your dad thinking you're a joke.

Mario

Yeah, well, my dad thinks I'm a joke, too.

Donkey Kong

Yeah? Well... [angrily] Your dad's right!

Mario

You know what? I feel bad enough. Just, just leave me alone.

Donkey Kong

I've never met your dad, but he sounds "brilliant".

Mario

Just go in a corner and smash some stuff, smash monkey!

Donkey Kong

I...AM...MORE...THAN A GUY...WHO SMASHES THINGS!!!!!
[The Maw-Ray burps; they find the engines of Donkey Kong's racing cart, look at one another, and smile. Cut to them launching themselves out of the Maw-Ray's mouth]

Bowser

♪ Mario, Luigi and a Donkey Kong, too / A thousand troops of Koopas couldn't keep me from you / Princess Peach, at the end of the line / I'll make you mine / Oh, Peaches, Peaches, Peaches, Peaches, Peaches / Peaches, Peaches, Peaches, Peaches, Peaches / I love you / Oh- ♪

Hey! Quiet in there! Lights out, little guy. [taps the bird cage with his weapon]

Bowser

Hey! You can't treat me like this! Do you know who I am? I am Bow-- [The Toad Guard slams the door with screen cuts to black; sighs]

Bowser

Peaches. [chuckles nervously] Uh, listen, this is not the way I pictured it, but give me one more chance.

Peach

Ew, no. [brings out the Mini Mushroom]

Bowser

No-no-no-no-no-! [Peach stuffs a Mini Mushroom into Bowser's mouth, causes him to shrink; in a high-pitched voice] Hey! Hey! That is not cool!

Donkey Kong

Ha! He got the Blue Mushroom!

Mario

See? Told ya I'd get you a pet turtle.

Peach

Not bad, mustache. And Luigi, you're so brave.

Luigi

Oh, thanks. [chuckles] Yeah, it's kind of my thing.

Mario

Wahoo!

Peach

Is there anything like this in your world?

Mario

What?

Peach

IS THERE ANYTHING LIKE THIS IN YOUR WORLD?!

Mario

No. We don't drive on rainbows.

Peach

What are you gonna tell me next? That the turtles aren't evil?

Luigi

Huh?

Tanooki Mario

Lu!

Luigi

Mario?! [laughs]

Tanooki Mario

I told ya! See? As long as we're together, everything is gonna be okay!

Luigi

Mario, why do you look like a bear? What is this?

Cranky Kong

Ya did good, kid. Make your pecs dance, you deserve it.

Donkey Kong

No time now, definitely later.

Bowser

LAUNCH THE BOMBER BILL, AND DESTROY THE MUSHROOM KINGDOM!!!!

Peach

No...

Tanooki Mario

Hey, hey...Hey, over here! [tries hitting the Bomber Bill's side, to no effect. He tries pushing the Bomber Bill's front, but ends up with his back against its tip.] You asked for it! [smacks the Bomber Bill's eye with his tail. The Bomber Bill stops in mid-air, bending the flagpole on top of Peach's Castle, glaring at him] Heh. Hello. [the Bomber Bill chases him through the Mushroom Kingdom. He crashes through a large mushroom] Ow! [gets the Bomber crashing into two more large mushrooms, getting some of the last one in his mouth before spitting it out] Really?! [spots the Warp Pipe that first brought him to the Mushroom Kingdom] Follow me! [starts leading the Bomber Bill to the Warp Pipe] Come on. [gets the Bomber Bill flying straight into the Warp Pipe's direction and speeds up] Little closer. [gets as close as possible to the Warp Pipe without going in it and flies upward at the last second; in slow motion] Mamma mia! [normal speed; Bomber Bill is sucked into the Warp Pipe with great force, but it explodes after floating into the Warp Zone, creating a visible disturbance on the outside of the Mushroom Kingdom's Warp Pipe] Huh?
[The Warp Pipe creates an explosion that throws Tanooki Mario against the wall of Bowser's Castle and powers him down. Mario falls before grabbing onto a ledge of Bowser's Castle. The Warp Pipe pulls Luigi, Peach, Toad, Bowser, and Donkey Kong in. Mario loses his grip on the ledge and is pulled after them]

Peach

They're all counting on us. No pressure.

Yeah! [now looking at Mario] Huh?

Peach

My Toads, our days of terror are almost over! With the help of the Kong Army, we will stop——— [Princess Peach clenches her hands into her fists.]

Uh, who's he? [points to Mario who nervously chuckles]

Peach

He's not inportant!
[In the answer, the Toads cheer again as Peach and Mario exit through the pipe]