Kung Fu Panda 3 2016 quotes, page 2

Po

What's the occasion?

Shifu

Today, will be my final class.

Po

Your final? I didn't know you were sick. Although, you have been looking a little--

Shifu

I'm not sick.

Po

Healthy. A little healthy. A lot actually.

Shifu

My final class, because from now on, your training will be in the hands of the Dragon Warrior. [points his staff at Po]

Po

WHAT?! [almost knocks Shifu back with his strong lungs] Me, teach? I mean, why not Tigress? She's always telling everyone what to do.

Tigress

Be quiet, Po.

Po

See what I mean?

Shifu

Tigress is not the Dragon Warrior. You are.

Po

Come on, they're the Five! What can I teach them?

Po

Who are you?

Li Shan

I'm Li Shan.

Po

What?

Li

I'm Li Shan, and I'm looking for my son.

Po

You lost your son?

Li

Yes. Many years ago.

Po

I lost my father.

Li

I'm very sorry.

Po

Thank you. [pause]

Li

Well, good luck to you.

Po

You too. I hope you find your son.

Li

And I hope you find your father. [they both walk off, everyone face palms, but they stopped with realization] Son? Oh, my gosh, it is you! Well, don't just stand there. Give your old man a hug!

Po

I can't believe you're alive!
[The crowd cheers. Mr. Ping is in bewildered shock.]

Shifu

Oogway... forgive me...

Tigress

This isn't going to work.

Po

It has to.

Tigress

You're not thinking straight.

Po

I am!

Tigress

You're not.

Po

I am.

Tigress

No.

Po

Yes, I am.

Tigress

No, I've seen Kai. I see what he can do.

Po

But he hasn't seen what I can do. [does the Wuxi Finger Hold again, just like in the first film]

Tigress

The Wuxi Finger Hold?

Po

It's my best move. I just have to get to Kai, grab his finger, and then, skadoosh, back to the spirit realm.

Tigress

He has an army of jade warriors. Everything they see, he sees. So, there's no sneaking up on him. [pushes him down] You'll never get close enough.

Po

It's gonna work. [gets up]

Tigress

He can only be stopped by a master of chi.

Po

Oh, you sound just like Shifu with the "Chi, chi, chi." "Chi this. Chi that." "Chi-chi-chi-chi-chi-chi!" I'm not a master of chi, okay? I don't know if I'm the Dragon Warrior. I don't even know if I'm a panda! I don't know who I am! You're right. There's no way I can stop him and his army.

Li Shan

Unless you had an army of your own.

Po

You?

Li Shan

Not just me.

Mr. Ping

Us.

Li Shan

All of us. [all the other pandas appear] I finally found my son, after all these years. It's going to take a lot more than the end of the world to keep us apart.

Po

But you don't even know kung fu.

Li Shan

Then you will teach us.

Po

What? I can't teach you kung fu. I couldn't even teach Tigress. And she already knows kung fu!

Li Shan

Po, I know I'm the last guy you wanna trust right now. But you gotta believe me. We can do this. We can learn kung fu. We can be just like you!

Shifu

I will not let you destroy Oogway's memory!

Kai

Why not? He destroyed mine.

Monkey

Mantis! It is me, your bestie! [jade Mantis punches him] Sorry Tigress! I’m sorry! Sorry!

Li Shan

Po...You taught us who we were meant to be. A father.

Tigress

A friend.

A dumpling kicker.

A lethal fighting machine.

Big Fun

A hugger.

Mei Mei

A nunchuck chick.

Stripy baby.

Mr. Ping

A family.

Po

Sorry, buddy. Gotta send you back to the Spirit Realm. Skadoosh! [flexes his pinkie, nothing happens] Okay...That didn't work; let me try one more time. Skadoosh! Skadoosh, skadoosh...! What the...?

Kai

Hold on, wait! It is working! No! No, no! No! No! Oh, no! No, no, no, no, no, no! No! [retches, then laughs] No, it's not. Did Oogway teach you that little trick? Too bad. It only works on mortals, and I...am a spirit warrior.

Po

Dad. Dad. Dads!

Li and Mr. Ping

Son! [both run to Po and hug him]

Mr. Ping

Don't you go disappearing in petals ever again.

Li Shan

We thought we lost you.

Po

No, you saved me. you all did. [looks at everybody and Big Fun laughs] Now, come on over here!

Big Fun

Hugs!

Po

Master Shifu!

Shifu

The student has truly become the tea- [notices the Staff of Wisdom in Po's hand] Wait. Where did you get that?

Po

Oh, this. Oogway gave it to me in the Spirit Realm.

Shifu

Of course he did.

Po

I think I've mastered chi.

Shifu

Of course you did. [looks at him hopefully] Can you teach me? [Po happily nods yes]

Li Shan

I wish I could have taught you this, son.

Po

It's okay, Dad. I'm...

Tigress

He's here.

Po

That's what I call a dramatic entrance!

Kai

You must be the Dragon Warrior.

Po

And you must be Kai - Beast of Vengeance, Maker of Widows.

Kai

Yes! Finally! Thank you! Almost makes me want to spare your life.

Po

Oh, you want to spare me? How about you spare me the chit-chat, alright? Let's do this.

Kai

I'm going to take your chi, then the chi of every panda in the-

Po

Augh! Chit-chat.

Kai

In the-

Po

Chitty-chitty-chat-chat, chat-chat-chat!

Kai

In the-

Po

Chit-chat!

Viper

Good job, Po.

Po

Did you at least learn a little something?

Tigress

Yes. [puts out a fire in her ear] That you can't teach.

Crane

And Tigress is flammable, turns out.

Mei Mei

Who's she?

Big stripy baby!

Po

What are you doing here?

Tigress

Kai attacked the Valley. He's taken every master in China, including Shifu and the others. It's all gone, Po. Everything. Everyone.

Po

Everyone?

Tigress

Everyone.

Mr. Ping

How's my restaurant? [some pandas look at him, confused] We'll talk later.

Tigress

And now he's on his way here. [to Po] He's after you, Po. He's after all pandas.
[All the pandas gasp in horror, fearing that Kai is coming for them]

Po

[walks up to his fatherYou need to teach me the secret chi technique now!

Li

No, no. I'm afraid you need more time. [to the pandas] Everyone, go get your things!

Po

I don't have more time! I need to learn it now!

Li

Sorry, you're not ready. [to the pandas] Pack everything!

Po

I am ready!

Li

Not quite.

Po

What are you talking about? I've done everything you've asked. I've mastered napping, sleeping in, hammocks, hot tubs. I am totally at one with my panda parts! Now why won't you show me?!

Li

Because I don't know it!

Po

You...what?

Li

I don't know, okay, it's because nobody does that; maybe we used to, but...but not anymore.

Po

You lied?

Li

No, I...Yes.

Po

Why?

Li

To save your life! I point out that some blade-swinging maniacs are coming for you. What am I supposed to do? Just-Just let that happen?!

Po

Yes! I'm the Dragon Warrior, facing maniacs! That's my job, but because of you, I left the valley unprotected. I left my friends unprotected, and now they're all...they're all...

Li

And you would have been, too! I lost you once; I am not going to lose you again. I can't. [tries to take Po to his hut]

Po

You just did. [storms off]

Kai

It took me five hundred years to take Oogway's chi. I will have yours if it takes me five hundred more!

Oogway

Inner peace... inner peace... [a peach blossom petal lands on his nose] Itchy nose... [gently blows the petal away, but as he breathes in, it flies back into his nostril; he sneezes, and it flies off] Finally, inner peace... [sensing a blade coming at him] Now what? [catches the blade with eyes still closed... as he opens them, he sees a second blade coming, he deflects both back to their owner...] Kai, old friend.

Kai

I will show you the true power of Chi, brother!