Henry Desalvo [Whilst watching the chaotic goings-on at Arthur Herk's house]
Moron #2 just got Moron #1 all wet.
Played by Dennis Farina 
Big Trouble (2002) · 78 quotes
Big Trouble (2002) · 78 quotes
2nd most-quoted character in Big Trouble (2002): in 15 of its 78 quotes
Most scenes with: Leonard (5)
There isn't any rule that says I can't come over here and fart on your entree.
More lines from Henry Desalvo
6 quotes Henry Desalvo Henry Desalvo [Whilst watching the chaotic goings-on at Arthur Herk's house]
There goes the warranty... and there goes the Iron Chef.
Henry Desalvo [Having narrowly escaped arrest from a disinterested police officer]
Well, Miami sucks. But the cops are kind of nice.
Henry Desalvo Was that a goat?!
Henry Desalvo [Trapped on a delayed plane with idiotic sports fans after a surreal day in Miami]
I really feel like killing someone.
Henry Desalvo [Whilst pointing a gun at three thugs who walk towards him while he is speaking to his employer on the phone]
"Not right now, okay?"
Scenes with Henry Desalvo
8 scenes
Henry Desalvo Football. Collage.
Morons
Henry Desalvo We have a die-hard situation developing in the kitchen.
What's happening?
Henry Desalvo Well, either he's going to whack 'em with a rolling pin or bake him a cake. I don't know. Could go either way with this crew.
Bruce I hope you realize you've just committed assault.
Henry Desalvo I know, I know. Time was, you actually had to hit somebody.
Henry Desalvo [Henry and Leonard are stuck in the middle of a big traffic jam, just right before the Airport Road]
We're gonna miss our flight.
You see what the problem is?
Henry Desalvo I don't know. There's some kind of commotion up there. There might be something about it on the radio.
Henry Desalvo [He turns on the radio - only to find the two same people arguing on the same phone-in show before turning off the radio in annoyance. After a moment in silence, a goat walks past the car; the two men pause for a moment in stunned silence] [Disbelieving]
Was that a goat?
Let's get the hell outta here.
Look at this thing. He's the size of a Buick.
Henry Desalvo She.
She what?
Henry Desalvo The mosquito is a she.
How the hell can you tell that?
Henry Desalvo Discovery Channel. Only the female mosquito sucks your blood.
Sounds like my ex-wife. "Bitch."
Henry Desalvo [back at his table]
You go tell your employer it's gonna cost him another 10 G's apiece.
His Boss
Okay. But we want this finished as soon as possible.
Henry Desalvo Well, believe me, we don't want to spend anymore time in this garden spot than we have to.
Got that right.
Henry Desalvo There was another shooter.
Voice on Payphone
What do you mean?
Henry Desalvo What do I mean? What do you mean "what do I mean". I mean there was another shooter is what I mean.
Henry Desalvo [a bunch of mean looking gangstas approach him.]
Ah, hang on.
Henry Desalvo [Henry pretends to drop an item only to reach for his ankle holstered gun.] [While aiming at the gangstas]
Not right now, okay.
Gang Leader
It's cool, bro.
Henry Desalvo [While approaching the annoying cigar smokers.]
Excuse me would you mind putting out your cigars?
Bruce Come again.
Henry Desalvo I said would you mind putting out your cigars, please?
Bruce Actually I would mind.
Henry Desalvo Well you see the reason I asked is because I got a thick New York strip over there and it tastes like I'm eating a cigar.
Bruce Well first of all Ace: You're eating a steak in a seafood restaraunt. And secondly there is no law that says we can't smoke.
Henry Desalvo Well first of all: My name is not Ace and second of all: I am not asking you as a courtesy, it's just good manners. Now there is no law that says I can't come over here and fart on your entree, but I don't. Why? Because it isn't good manners. Now I will ask you again in the nicest way to please put out your cigars.
Henry Desalvo [Bruce blows smoke in henry's face and laughs with his friends. Henry snaps Bruce's fingers and puts out his cigar and everyone does the same.]
Thank you.
Bruce I hope you realize you just committed assault.
Henry Desalvo I know, I know. I remember time was you actually had to hit somebody.
