Remember, kid, there's heroes and there's legends. Heroes get remembered, but legends never die. Follow your heart, kid, and you'll never go wrong.
Benny
Pablo P. Vitar · 11 quotes
Ham Porter
Patrick Renna · 11 quotes
Squints
Chauncey Leopardi · 10 quotes
Smalls
Tom Guiry · 7 quotes
Bertram
Grant Gelt · 5 quotes
Narrator (adult Smalls)
David Mickey Evans · 5 quotes
Timmy
Victor DiMattia · 5 quotes
Yeah-Yeah
Marty York · 4 quotes
Kenny
Brandon Quintin Adams · 3 quotes
Phillips
Wil Horneff · 3 quotes
Sandlot Kids
3 quotes
Tommy
Shane Obedzinski · 3 quotes
Babe Ruth
Art LaFleur · 2 quotes
Most scenes together: Benny & Squints (6), Benny & Ham Porter (5), Benny & Bertram (5)
The Sandlot quotes
Page 1 of 2If my dog was as ugly as you, I'd shave its butt and tell it to walk backwards.
This pop isn't working, Benny! I'm baking like a toasted cheeser - it's so hot here!
For-ev-er! For-ev-er! For-ev-er!
[referring to the chewed-up baseball]
That's really nice of you, but that ball really is signed by Babe Ruth.
Mr. Mertle So is this one...with the rest of the 1927 Yankees.
Have you ever done a paper route?
No, but I helped a guy once.
Man, you think too much! I bet you get straight A's and shit!
No, I got a B once. Well, actually it was an A minus but it should have been a B.
Man, this is baseball. You'd better stop thinking. Just have fun. I mean, if you were having fun, you would've caught that ball. You ever have a paper route?
I helped a guy once.
Okay, well, chuck it like you throw paper. When your arm gets here, just let go. Just let go, it just might be easy.
Just stand out there and stick your glove out in the air. Let me take care of it.
About time, Benny! My clothes are goin' out of style.
They already are, Squints.
Shut up!
What took you guys so long?
Eh, Squints was pervin' a dish.
Shut up! I was not!
Yeah yeah you were! Your tongue was hangin' outta your head, and you was swoonin', 'Oh Wendy Preffercorn, my darling lover-girl, ho!'
I said "shut up!" Got a lot of things on my mind.
You got a fireplace man?
Yeah why.
Throw that hat in it.
Come on batter this is a short game and i have to get home for lunch.
Is that your sister out in left field? Naked? She's naked, you know.
Hey, hey, hey. I'm just trying to have a friendly conversation, come on. [two seconds later] Think she'll go out with me?
Hey, you want a s'more?
Some more of what?
No, do you want a s'more?
I haven't had anything yet... so how can I have some more of nothing?
You're killing me, Smalls! These are s'mores stuff. Okay, pay attention. First you take the graham. You stick the chocolate on the graham. Then, you roast the mallow. When the mallow's flaming, you stick it on the chocolate. Then you cover it with the other end. Then, you stuff.
Yes! That's how you do it, Smalls.
Ham, you idiot. Now we can't play no more.
Kid
Great, you idiot.
It was a heater.
Kid#2
Stupid idiot!
[At bat, having missed Kenny's first pitch]
You call that pitching?! [Kenny laughs] This is baseball, not tennis. Give me something to hit!
All right, Ham. This is my heater! I DARE you to hit it!
You'll be sorry.
You want the heater? I'll give it to ya. [Pitches the ball to Ham, who hits a home run over the one fence, much to the team's dismay]
Yeah! That's how you do it, Smalls! [Slowly starts to round the bases]
Ham, you idiot! Now we can't play no more!
Great, you [Throws his glove at Ham] idiot!
Low and outside! Just like I like it. [The team continues to chase after Ham, smacking him with their hats, and pelting him with their gloves, except Benny, who quietly gathers up his gear, and Smalls, who watches in confusion]
Even though none of us had ever seen a Playboy magazine, which we constantly lied about, we figured going to the pool was the next best thing to being there. It wasn't really the pool honeys, like we said; because, if any one of them had come up to any one of us, we'd have just peed our pants. We all went because, well, because Wendy Peffercorn was the lifeguard.
Yeah, yeah. Too cool.
She don't know what she's doing.
She don't know what she's doing.
Yeah, she does. She knows exactly what she's doing.
I've swum here every summer in my adult life. And every summer, there she is. Lotion. Oiling. Oiling! Lotion. Smiling. Smiling! I can't take this no more!
It's easy when you play with a bunch of rejects and a fat kid, Rodriguez.
Shut your mouth, Phillips!
What'd you say, crap face?
I said, you shouldn't be allowed to touch a baseball. Except for Rodriguez, you're all an insult to the game.
Come on! We'll take you on, right here! Right now! Come on!
Yeah!
We play on a real diamond, Porter. You ain't good enough to lick the dirt off our cleats.
Watch it, jerk!
Shut up, idiot!
Moron!
Scab eater!
Butt sniffer!
Pus licker!
Fart smeller!
You eat dog crap for breakfast, geek!
You mix your Wheaties with your mama's toe jam!
Yeah!
You bob for apples in the toilet! And you like it!
You play ball like a girl!
You heard me.
Tomorrow. Noon, at our field. Be there, buffalo-butt breath.
Count on it, pee-drinking crap-face!
Yeah!