Randy quotes from Crank: High Voltage (2009)

View Quote [To Eve] Look, baby. All right, I'm tryin' to be cool to you, but I will drop the hammer. [Holds up hand in a manner implying domestic violence] You want me to drop the hammer, baby? [Gets thrown onto a parked car by Eve of unexplained superhuman strength]

View Quote [Chev has arrived at a strip club and Eve comes out dancing]
Chev Chelios: Eve? Eve. Here, baby. Eve! [Takes her hand]
Eve: Chev.
Randy: Hey. I need you to take your ****in' hands off Lemon now, man.
Chev Chelios: Who the **** are you?
Randy: Who the **** am I? Who the **** are you? Do you know this guy, Lemon?
Chev Chelios: Lemon?
Eve: You were dead. Uh... I'm...uh, I'm so confused right now. What's that ticking sound?
Randy: Yeah, what is that sound? You're kinda weird, tick-man. It's time for you to go!
Chev Chelios: Randy? Randy? Come here.
Eve: [Ria attacks her out of jealousy] ****!
Chev Chelios: Not you. Babe, it's not--
Eve: Who the **** is that?
Chev Chelios: Ah, some whore. ****, no. That was a mistake. Oh, ****. Look she's helpin' me find my heart.
Eve: Yeah. What?!
Chev Chelios: Go away! Come on, let's go. What? Oh, you dozy ****.
Chico: [To posse] No. We need his ass alive. [To Chev] Chev Chelios. Let's save some bullets, dude.
Chev Chelios: I'm up for that, when we've all had a drink.
Eve: Should I duck?
Chev Chelios: Yeah. [A gun battle ensues]
...
Chev Chelios: Shall I bypass the formalities?
Thug: Of course.
Chev Chelios: Who do you work for and what the **** do they want with me?
Thug: EI Huron.
Chev Chelios: English! What's a ****in' ee-el-who-done?
Thug: It's a ferret. He wants you alive... so he can watch you die.
Chev Chelios: Oh, yeah? Why?
Thug: I don't know. Doesn't everybody?
Chev Chelios: Shut up. Ooh, you lucky bastard.

View Quote Randy: Lemon. Hey, hey, hey!
Eve: Randy?!
Randy: Hi.
Eve: What are you doing here?
Randy: It's about the dude.
Eve: What dude?
Randy: The asshole.
Eve: What about him?
Randy: He's on every channel. The guy's a **** psycho killer, baby. Every cop in this city's looking for him, not to mention the **** beaners. [Whispers] The **** Orientals.
Eve: So?!
Randy: So?! So?! So the heat's on the street... and that dude's playing for keeps, baby.
Eve: I have no idea what the hell you just said.
Randy: Look. Lemon. Lemon, look.
Eve: What?!
Randy: I know we've all been down our dark roads in the past, okay, babe?
[Randy has flashback to an ex-girlfriend, a loud mouthed obese black woman]
Ex-girlfriend: I need my hair did, my nails did. You ain't gave me no money. Where you been at, Randy? If I ever catch you with another bitch... Well, you do got a big-ass dick for a white boy.
Randy: Anyway, look, the point is, you're my lady now, all right? I don't think it's safe for you to be out there with that, that sick ****o running wild right now.
Eve: You can say that again.
Randy: Look, look. Listen to me. Here's what I think we should do.
Eve: What, Randy?!
Randy: All right, I say we go to the fuzz. We tell them everything. We come clean.
Eve: What?!
Randy: The fuzz, all right? I mean, I'd kill this guy myself, but I got two strikes against me.
Eve: Let go of me!
Randy: Look, baby. All right? I'm trying to be cool to you, but I will drop the hammer. You want me to drop the hammer, baby? [Eve knees him in crotch and throws him onto a car windshield]
Eve: I'm in no mood today, Randy!
Randy: Lemon!