Annie [having sex]
I'm glad you called.
I'm so glad you were free.
Annie I love your eyes.
Cup my balls.
Played by Kristen Wiig 
Bridesmaids (2011) · 17 quotes
Bridesmaids (2011) · 17 quotes
Most-quoted character in Bridesmaids (2011): in 11 of its 17 quotes
Most scenes with: Lillian (4), Megan Price (2), Helen (2)
You're really doing it, aren't ya? You're shitting in the street!
Scenes with Annie Walker
10 scenes Annie Annie 
This is Dougie's sister Megan.
You must be Annie's fella?
Annie I'm not... He's not... I'm not with him.
I'm glad he's single, 'cause I'm gonna climb that like a tree.
You remember my cousin, Rita.
Annie Rita!
Rita
[hugs Annie]
Annie, I haven't seen you since you graduated high school.
She has three kids now.
Rita
Three boys.
They're so cute.
Rita
They are cute, but when they reach that age, ugh. Disgusting. They smell, they're sticky, they say things that are horrible, and there is semen all over everything. Disgusting. I cracked a BLANKET in half. Do you get where I'm going with this?
Annie I do, yeah.
Rita
[gesturing]
I cracked it in HALF.
Flight Attendant
Miss?!
Annie Um, no...it's not me.
Flight Attendant
Yes, it is you. Please go back to your seat.
Annie Yes, I'm with him. I'm, uh...I'm Mrs. Igles...I'm Mrs. Iglesias.
Flight Attendant
Uh, no you're not. You were just out here and you put sunglasses on. Out.
Annie But I don't want to...
Sir, she can have my seat, okay? Everyone should experience first class at least once in their lives, and Annie shouldn't miss out just because she can't afford it.
Flight Attendant
No, ma'am. I'm afraid that's not allowed.
Annie Help me, I'm poor.
Flight Attendant Steve
You have 3 seconds to get back to your seat.
Annie No one can get anywhere in 3 seconds. You're setting me up for a loss already.
...
Annie Whatever you say, Stove.
Flight Attendant Steve
It's Steve.
Annie Stove? What kind of a name is that?
Flight Attendant Steve
That's not a name. My name is Steve.
Annie Are you an appliance?
Flight Attendant Steve
No, I am a man, and my name is Steve.
Annie You're a flight attendant.
Flight Attendant Steve
That is absolutely accurate. You can close that.
Annie You read my diary?
Brynn
At first I did not know it was your diary. I thought it was a very sad handwritten book.
Oh, Annie, these are my kids.
Girl
Step kids. Step.
Girl
Going to the snack bar.
Awesome. You need a ride home later?
Boy
**** off, Helen. [walks off]
Okay. Put a quarter in the swear jar. Good to see ya. [turns to Annie] So cute.
Annie [nodding]
Sweet kids.
13-Year-Old Girl in Jewelry Store
You're weird.
Annie I'm not weird, okay?
13-Year-Old Girl in Jewelry Store
Yes, you are.
Annie No, I'm not! And you started it.
13-Year-Old Girl in Jewelry Store
No, you started it! Did you forget to take your Xanax this morning?
Annie Oh, I feel bad for your parents.
13-Year-Old Girl in Jewelry Store
I feel bad for your face.
Annie Okay. Well, call me when your boobs come in.
13-Year-Old Girl in Jewelry Store
You call me when yours come in.
Annie What do you have, four boyfriends?
13-Year-Old Girl in Jewelry Store
Exactly.
Annie Okay. Yeah, have fun having a baby at your prom.
13-Year-Old Girl in Jewelry Store
You look like an old mop.
Annie You know, you're not as popular as you think you are.
13-Year-Old Girl in Jewelry Store
I am very popular.
Annie [sticks tongue in cheek and mimics fellatio]
Oh, I'm sure you are...very...popular.
13-Year-Old Girl in Jewelry Store
Well, you're an old, single loser who's never going to have any friends.
Annie You're a little ****!
Annie Are you **** kidding me?
Annie's Mom: Annie?
Annie No, mom. Mother**** Paris? I told you about Paris, Helen! I told you about this whole idea!
Annie, calm down...
Annie No, Lillian! What are you gonna go, you're gonna go to Paris with Helen now? What are you gonna, you guys gonna ride around on bikes with berets and **** baguettes in the basket on the front of your bikes? Oh, how romantic! What woman gives another woman a trip to Paris? Am I right? Lesbian! We're all thinking it, aren't we?
Becca
[quickly]
I'm not.
I was.
Annie Okay! Yes, we're all thinking it, right?
Annie's Mom: Annie...
Annie Lillian, this is not the you that I know! The you that I know would have walked in here and rolled your eyes and would have thought that this was completely over the top, ridiculous and stupid! Look at this shower! Look at that **** cookie! Did you really think that this group of women was gonna finish that cookie? Really, and you know that reminds me actually; I never got a chance to try that **** cookie! [storms off]
You know what? This is supposed to be about my time. You have managed to ruin every event in my wedding, thank you very much.
Annie Okay, well, thank YOU very much. It's all her fault! It is not mine! And you would know that if you got your beautiful haired head out of your asshole. In fact, out of HER asshole. Which I'm sure is perfectly bleached!
You know what? IT IS! And you know how I know? Because I went to the **** salon with her! And I got MY asshole bleached too!! And I LOVE my new asshole!
