Jason Sudeikis movie quotes

View Quote [Speaking to Brad on the phone] I'm here to pick up a smidge of pot. This is not a smidge of pot! You got me moving enough weed to kill Willie Nelson, man!

View Quote Scottie P.: What's up dog?
David: Not much dog, what's up with you?
Scottie P.: I'm here to pick up Casey. You know what I'm sayin'?
David: Well, I'm awake and I speak English, so yeah, I know what you're saying.

View Quote Rose: You're not a neighbor. You're a drug dealer. Whose apartment smells like cheese and feet?
David: Mm. Yeah, it's a candle I got from Anthropologie. "Cheesy Feet" is what they call it. It's a best-seller.

View Quote (Nick, Kurt and Dale are attempting to sneak into Rex's house)
Dale: Wait. Shit. What if he's in there?
Kurt: Oh, yeah. How do we make sure he's not?
Nick: (sarcastically) I don't know. Why don't you guys ring the doorbell while you're hot?
Kurt: (taking sarcasm seriously) I love it. Smart.
Nick: No. Don't. Don't, Kurt!
(Kurt rings the doorbell, which rings 7 notes from Badfinger's "No Matter What"; Dale and Nick run and take cover)
Dale: Oh, shit! Are you kidding?!
Kurt: You know, it's pretty dark in there. I don't think anybody's here.
(rings doorbell a second time)
Nick: Don't...don't hit it again!
Kurt: You hear that?
Dale: I know that song.
Kurt: Huh? What is that?
Kurt: It's a song, right? Is it... (singing) No matter what you do...
Nick: No, no.
Dale and Kurt: (singing) I will always be with you...
Dale: Who sings that?
Kurt: Badfinger.
Dale and Kurt: (singing) Doesn't matter what you do girl...
Nick: (whispers) Quiet!
Dale and Kurt: (singing, ignoring Nick) Ooh, girl with you...
Nick: You nailed it.
Dale and Kurt: (singing loudly, still ignoring Nick) Knock on this old gray wall!
Nick: (whispering loudly) Shut the **** up!!

View Quote (after waking up out of Rex's closet, only to find him gone)
Kurt: Will you look at this **** view during the daytime? You kidding me? Unbelievable!
Nick: He seems gone. Bed's made.
Kurt: I can't believe this.
Dale: We should maybe just check (yelling) HEY! REX!
Nick: Hey.
Dale: REX! REX!
Nick: Dale!
Dale: Huh?
Nick: Did you have a plan if he responded?
Dale: I didn't think that far ahead.
Nick: Of course you didn't.
Kurt: I would have been just quieter.
Nick: You're even dumber in the mornings.
(the following is seen in the extended version only)
Kurt: What are you worried about?
Nick: Let's go.
Dale: Fifty-fifty chance, you know. Fifty-fifty chance he was here.

View Quote (Nick is attempting to call Bert on a dark phone that Kurt seemingly left on the bench for him to await instructions, however a cell phone rings in Kurt's pocket, he gets it out)
Dale: Hey, what's that? Who's calling you?
Kurt: I don't know. It's blocked.
Nick: (realizes Kurt has the dark phone) Oh, no.
Kurt: (answers phone) Hello.
Nick: (right behind Kurt) Hi.
Kurt: (does not know that it is Nick) Who is this?
Nick: It's me, dickless! (angrily slams phone to the ground)
Kurt: Hey, what are you doing? You're supposed to call the dark phone.
Nick: I did! You've got it in your hand. You were supposed to tape that under the bench.

View Quote [in slow motion] OW!!! I hurt my elbow!

View Quote [to his daughter] Just because you haven't seen something doesn't mean it's not there.

View Quote [in slow motion when discovering Moonhaven] It's so beautiful!

View Quote How long does the invisibility last for? [Garry Pig: Forever.]

View Quote I just don't think this is gonna work.

View Quote Red: Those pigs...
Chuck: ...Are going to pay...
Bomb: ...For our lunches!
Red: Uh, because of our hunger to give them...
Chuck: ...A taste of their own...
Bomb: ...Quesadillas! [Red looks at him] What?

View Quote Did you just make a plan to make a plan?