Jack McBrayer movie quotes

View Quote I am really freaking OUT, YOU GUYS!!

View Quote I just ate all my rations!!!

View Quote Why are our feet so big?

View Quote It's not always bad to be in last place. Here's some things we can focus on: One, we tried hard. And two, we're still dear friends!

View Quote Ricky, this car is like your Excalibur, the mighty sword King Arthur used to bring together the knights of the roundtable, until Lancelot betrayed him by laying with his queen [whispering] in the biblical sense.

View Quote [about being a pit crew member] Sorry, Lucius, but it's a hard habit to break, like stalking an ex-girlfriend.

View Quote Ralph: [bursts through the wall of Felix's jail cell] Felix!
Felix: Ralph! [jumps up; hugs Ralph] I'm so glad to see you! [lets go] Wait. No, I'm not! What do you have to say for yourself?!
Ralph: I—
Felix: Wait! I don't want to hear it. I'm not talking to you.
Ralph: Okay. Don't talk. That's fine. [dumps out a can full of the broken go-kart] But you have to fix this go-kart for me, pronto.
Felix: I don't have to do boo! Forgive my potty mouth. I'm just so…so cross with you! Do you have any idea what you've put me through?! I ran higgeldy-piggeldy all over creation looking for you! I almost drowned in chocolate milk mix! And then…I met the most dynamite gal. Oh. She gives me the honey glows somethin' awful. But…she rebuffed my affections. And then, I got thrown in jail!
Ralph: Felix, pull yourself together!
Felix: No, Ralph! You have no idea what it's like to be rejected and treated like a criminal! [turns away]
Ralph: Yes, I do. That's every day of my life.
Felix: It is?
Ralph: Which is why I ran off. I tried to be a good guy, but I'm not! I'm just a bad guy. But I need your help. There's a little girl whose only hope is this kart. Please, Felix, fix it! And I promise, I will never try to be good again.
[Felix smiles; pulls out his hammer]

View Quote Sour Bill: All hail the rightful ruler of Sugar Rush: Princess Vanellope.
Taffyta: [gasps] I remember! She's our princess!
Candlehead: Oh, that's right!
Taffyta: We are so sorry about the way we treated you!
Rancis: Yeah, those were, uh, jokes!
Candlehead: I was just doing what Taffyta told me to do!
Vanellope: Tut tut! As your merciful princess, I hereby decree that everyone who was ever mean to me shall be… executed.
Racers: What?!
Taffyta: No, no, no, please! Please!
Felix: Oh, my land!
Calhoun: Well, this place just got interesting.
Taffyta: [drops to her knees] No! I don't wanna die!
Vanellope: Ah, I'm just kiddin'!
Taffyta: You are?
Vanellope: Stop crying, Taffyta.
Taffyta: [hyperventilates] I'm trying! It won't stop!

View Quote [Ralph and Gene are arguing during Felix's 30th anniversary]
Felix: How about we just eat the cake?
Gene: Hang on, Felix needs to be on the roof because he's about to get his medal!
Wreck-It Ralph: Well, then, how about we just take that medal and give it to Ralph for once. Would that be the end of the world Gene?
Gene: Now you're just being ridiculous, only good guys win medals And you sir are no good guy!
Wreck-It Ralph: I could be a good guy if I wanted to and I could win a medal.
Gene: Uh-huh. And when you do, come and talk to us.
Wreck-It Ralph: And then would you finally let me be on top of the cake with you guys?!
Gene: If you won a medal, we'd let you live up here in the penthouse, but it will never happen because you're just the bad guy who wrecks the building.
Wreck-It Ralph: No, I'm not.
Gene: Yes, you are.
Wreck-It Ralph: No, I'M NOT!!!! [angrily smashes the cake and everyone gasps]
Gene: Yes, you are.
Wreck-It Ralph: Alright, Gene. You know what? I'm gonna win a medal. Oh, I am gonna win a medal! The shiniest medal this place has ever seen! A medal that will be so good that it will make Felix's medals...WET THEIR PANTS!! And good night. Thank you for the party. [Ralph exits]

View Quote Let me just say that if God was a city planner, he would not put a playground next to a sewage system.

View Quote You've got Christ between your thighs... but with a shorter beard.

View Quote Rachel Jansen: Where's your wife, sir?
Darald Braden: She is in bed.
Peter Brenner: How are things going with the lady?
Darald Braden: Not awesome. She's complicated- like The Da Vinci Code, you know, but- harder to... crack. But life is full of lessons, you learn something new every day, so... [pause] wonder what I'm going to learn... tomorrow? Well! Good night!
Rachel Jansen: Good night, sir.
Peter Bretter: Night, sir.
Darald Braden: Off to find the mythical clitoris!
Rachel Jansen: So! [Peter snickers into his drink] Peter, were you able to get that crying lady out of your room? 'Cause, I could send someone up, if you want.
Peter Bretter: Oh, you could?
Rachel Jansen: Yeah.
Peter Bretter: That's very funny. It is.
Rachel Jansen: Well, listen. The Sarah Marshall Show sucks. Who cares?
Peter Bretter: I do the music for that program. [awkward pause]
Rachel Jansen: Well, did I mention that the music rocks?
Peter Bretter: [chuckles] That's very sweet of you. That's very sweet of you to say. You don't have to say that, though. It's not music. There's no melody, it's just tones. Just dark, ominous tones. [mimics a line from the show] "The Masturbating Dog-Killer is on the loose again! He'll kill the owner, but at least the dogs are happy!" [imitates one of his 'tones' and he and Rachel both laugh]