The Royal Tenenbaums quotes

105 total quotes

Chas Tenenbaum
Eli Cash
Etheline Tenenbaum

Margot Tenenbaum
Multiple Characters
Richie Tenenbaum
Royal Tenenbaum

View Quote Eli: I'm very sorry, Margot.
Margot: It's okay. We're not actually related anyway.
Eli: True.

View Quote Of course it's dark. It's a suicide note.

View Quote He looks pretty good for a suicide. Attempted, anyway.

View Quote What about Sing-Sang? I owe her a hundred.

View Quote Eli: What'd you say?
Richie: Hmm? I didn't say anything.
Eli: When? Right now?

View Quote Eli Cash: You never gave me the time of day until I started getting good reviews.
Margot Tenenbaum: Your reviews aren't that good.

View Quote Eli: You never even gave me the time of day till I started getting good reviews.
Margot: Your reviews weren't that good.
Eli: But the sales are.

View Quote Royal: You always put raising the kids before everything else.
Etheline: I tried to. Lately I'm feeling like I might not've done such a good job.

View Quote Royal: Can we get somebody over here to kill these mice for us?
Margot: No. They belong to Chas. Or anyway he invented them.
Royal: Get him to stick them in a ****ing cage or something.

View Quote Eli: How's Richie?
Margot: I don't know. I can't tell.
Eli: Yeah, me neither. He wrote me a letter. He says he's in love with you.
Margot: What are you talking about?
Eli: That's what he said. I don't know how we're supposed to take it.

View Quote To tell you the truth, I haven't slept with a man in eighteen years.

View Quote [Royal tells his children of his impending divorce]
Richie: Is it because of us?
Royal: Well, of course, certain sacrifices had to be made as a result of having children. But lord, no.

View Quote Royal: Which one are you?
Ari: Ari
Royal: Uzi, I'm your grandfather.

View Quote Eli: I'm not in love with you any more.
Margot: I didn't ever know that you were.
Eli: Let's not make this any more difficult than it already is.

View Quote [immediately after wrecking his car] Where's my shoe?