A character in The Royal Tenenbaums (2001)

Chas Tenenbaum quotes from The Royal Tenenbaums (2001)

Ben Stiller

5th most-quoted character in The Royal Tenenbaums (2001): in 16 of its 107 quotes
Most scenes with: Royal Tenenbaum (4), Richie Tenenbaum (4), Etheline Tenenbaum (3)

A line from Chas Tenenbaum [after the fire drill]

Four minutes, forty-eight seconds. We're all dead. Burned to a crisp.

More lines from Chas Tenenbaum

3 quotes
Chas Tenenbaum

He also stole bonds out of my safety deposit box when I was fourteen.

Scenes with Chas Tenenbaum

12 scenes
[Chas Tenenbaum and his sons enter his mother's house with several bags]

Chas? What's going on?

Chas

We got locked out of our apartment.

Well, did you call a locksmith?

Chas

Uh huh.

Well, I don't understand. Did you pack your bags BEFORE you got locked out?

Chas

It's not safe there.

What are you talking about?

Chas

The apartment. I have to get some new sprinklers and a back-up security system installed.

But there are no sprinklers here either.

Chas

We might have to do something about that too.

I got a pretty bad case of cancer.

Chas
[yawns]

How long you gonna last?

Not long.

Chas

A month? A year?

About six weeks. Let me get to the point, the three of you and your mother are all I've got and I love you more than anything.
[Chas scoffs and mock laughs] Oh ho! Ho ho!

Chas, let me finish here! I've got six weeks to set things right with you and I aim to do it. Will you give me a chance?

Chas

No.

Do you speak for everyone?

Chas

I speak for myself.

Well you've had your say, now it's someone else's turn.

Young Chas Tenenbaum
[about Margot's play]

What'd you think, Dad?

Didn't seem believable to me.

[to Eli]

Why are you wearing pajamas? Do you live here?

He has permission to sleep over.

Young Chas Tenenbaum

Well, did you at least think the characters were well developed?

What characters? It's just a bunch of little kids dressed up in animal costumes.

Good night, everyone.

Well, sweetie, don't get mad at me. That's just one man's opinion.

Uzi Tenenbaum

Who's your father?

Chas

His name is Royal Tenenbaum.

Ari

You told us he was already dead.

Chas

Yeah, well now he's really dying.

Chas

Please! Mr. Sherman, this is a family matter.

Don't talk to him like that.

Call me Henry.

Chas

I prefer Mr. Sherman.

Call him Henry.

Chas

Why? I don't know him that well.

You've known him for ten years.

Chas

Yes, as your accountant, Mr. Sherman.

[referring to Royal]

I think he's very lonely. Lonelier than he lets on. Maybe lonelier than he even realizes.

Have you spoken to him about this?

Briefly. And he agreed that -

Chas

I'm sorry, maybe I'm a little confused here. What are you suggesting?

That he come here and stay in my room.

Chas

Are you out of your mind?

No. I'm not. Anyway I think he'd be much more comfortable here than at -

Chas

Who gives a shit?

I do.

Chas

You poor sucker. You poor, washed up papa's boy.

Chas

Looks like you and Dad are back together again, huh.

He's your dad too, Chas.

Chas

No, he's not.

Yes, he is.

Chas

You really hate me, don't you?

No. I don't. I love you.

Chas

Well, I don't know what you think you're gonna get out of this, but believe me, whatever it is, it's not worth it.

Chas. I don't want to hurt you. I know what you and the boys have been through. You're my brother and I love you.

Chas

Stop saying that!

I wrote a suicide note.

Chas

You did?

Right after I regained consciousness.

Chas

Can we read it?

No.

Chas

Can you paraphrase it for us?

I don't think so.

Chas Tenenbaum

Was it dark?

Of course it's dark, it's a suicide note.

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