...and he want's to enter that garden, with a knowlege, and a mulch...
Cousin Eddie
Randy Quaid · 13 quotes
Clark Griswold
Chevy Chase · 11 quotes
Rusty Griswold
Ethan Embry · 9 quotes
Ellen Griswold
Beverly D'Angelo · 8 quotes
Cousin Vicki
Shae D'Lyn · 5 quotes
Most scenes together: Clark Griswold & Cousin Eddie (2)
National Lampoon's Vegas Vacation quotes
Page 1 of 3Eddie, did anyone ever tell you, you're bad luck.
You know, those were my mother's dying words. Course, when you're covered in third degree burns and your leg's caught in a bear trap, you're bound to say weird things.
Clark. Are you feeling lucky tonight, Sparky?
Not right now, honey. They're teaching me baccarat.
Here, make the seats good.
Maitre d' [begins pouring coins into the Maitre d's hand]
No...gratuity...necessary, sir. Right this way.
Jilly Kid, you made me a lot of money tonight. Hey, you like gettin' massages?
By who?
Jilly [sarcastically]
By who...by me. Meet me in the spa tomorrow at 10 o'clock.
You need any help with the grill, Eddie?
No thanks, Clark. Don't have one. [throws chicken onto a rock]
Audrey OK, what happened to you last night?
[giggles]
Audrey [Audrey and Rusty sit down to breakfast]
Coffee
Me, too.
Make it three.
Kids!
Audrey Daddy, don't shout.
What do you say we each have an 'alone day', where each of us can go out and explore the city of Las Vegas in their own way.
Clark, I don't think that's such a good...
Thanks
Audrey See, ya.
Don't worry, honey. You're gonna love it. See ya.
Security
Have you seen a guy named Nick Papagiorgio?
Yes, he took my wallet. He's over there.
[at Club Areola] 'Security: Your usual table, Mr. Papagiorgio?
Not today, Jimmy.
You're in big trouble, mister.
Clark. Are we lost?
Yeah, dad. What block are we on?
Very funny, Rus.
I wanna gamble.
Russell. I never want to hear those words come out of your mouth again. Gambling is a very serious business.
You need any help with the grill, Eddie?
No thanks, Clark. Don't have one. [throws chicken onto a rock] I'll get the tongs
Ahh Uban Coffee you know you can sprinkle that stuff on anything, ice cream, mashed potatoes or just eat it straight out of the can for a quick pick me up.
Aw, she's got her mother's looks and her daddy's sense of balance.
Clark, have you ever tried to swim with the dolphins?
Clark, this is a family trip. Can you try to stay with the family.
Could be worse...you could be pregnant again.
Couldn't you just roll us around on the bed again.
Hard six coming out.
Hey, kids. Round-up time!
His name is not Papagiorgio. His name is Rusty Griswold and he's a C+ student!
Holy crap, Wayne Newton's hittin' on mom!
Honey, these boys ain't much to look at, but, if you want a night away from your cat...
Honey, these boys ain't much to talk to, but, if you want a night away from your cat... they're more than fine.