I ought to have stayed in Kentucky where I belong.
3rd most-quoted character in The Life Aquatic with Steve Zissou (2004): in 23 of its 117 quotes
Most scenes with: Oseary Drakoulias (18), Steve Zissou (16), Klaus Daimler (2)
I've never seen so many electric jellyfish in all my life!
More lines from Ned Plimpton
4 quotesI still wish I could breathe underwater.
If you ever touch me again I will kick your goddamn teeth out.
I'm gonna fight you, Steve!
Scenes with Ned Plimpton
18 scenesCaptain Zissou my name is Ned Plimpton...
OK, Man.
You're supposed to be my son, right?
I don't know. But I did want to meet you, just in case.
Why didn't you ever try to contact me?
Because I hate fathers, and I never wanted to be one.
People say that when someone says something like that, it's because they're jealous. But it still hurts. It hurts bad.
That man was damn rude. He can go straight to hell.
Your cat's dead.
What? Which one?
Marmalade. I'm sorry.
What happened?
A rattlesnake bit it in the throat.
Goddamn it, Eleanor, why do you have to say it like that? You couldn't try to break it a little bit nicer?
She's a rich bitch, you know. She was raised by maids. Her parents paid for this island and two of my worst movies. People say she's the brains behind Team Zissou.
People say a lot of things. What kind of cat was it?
Who gives a shit?
I think it was a tabby.
So, you really think you're a Zissou.
I don't know.
Well, you traveled a long way for "I don't know," sonny.
That's true. But it's important to me.
Yeah? Well, there are a lot of things that are important to some people around here, sonny.
Klaus, don't call me "sonny."
And one more thing: It's the Steve Zissou show, not the Ned show. [slaps Ned in the face] You hear me?
Yes, I do. Klaus?
Ja?
If you ever touch me again, I will kick your goddamn teeth out. Is that understood?
Not if I don't see you first, sonny.
When'd you first hear about me?
About five years ago. I read it in an article about myself.
Did you believe it?
It was in the paper. I assumed they checked their facts.
I dunno, I think that bull-**** reporter is gonna burn us.
I don't think she's a lesbian, Dad. She's pregnant.
Bull **** can get pregnant. Anyway, I'd back out now, but we need the press.
Can you hear the Jack Whales singing?
Beautiful. I wonder what they're saying.
Well actually that's a Sludge Tanker over there... [Several whales sing] There you go!
Who locked us out?
No-one, we're trespassing.
Steve, are we allowed in here?
It's a scientific community, man.
Oh, no, no, no.
No exceptions. Everyone gets one. Anne-Marie! Do the interns get glocks?
No. They all share one.
What happened to Jacqueline?
She didn't really love me.
In other words, you **** us!
Let's not cast stones at one another, my dear. Do you hear me, damn it? Do you?
No, I don't! I told you how to play it!
Oh, bloody hell! You listen here, mate!
Can I interrupt for a second?
Who the blazes is that?
It's me, Ned. Maybe this is nothing, maybe it's something. I don't know what your problems are, I don't know... but I just inherited $275,000. Would that amount make any difference?
Stevesy, what's happenin'? Are those hijackers?
Well, we call them pirates out here, Ned. You were supposed to be on watch, by the way.
Ned, how many fingers am I holdin' up?
I don't know. That's not my job. Too many to tell. How many fingers—
He's gonna be just fine.
You don't know me. You never wanted to know me. I'm just a character in your film.
It's a documentary. It's all really happening.
Well, damn you for that.
I'm gonna fight you, Steve.
You never say, "I'm gonna fight you, Steve." You just smile and act natural, and then you sucker-punch him.
You fight your way, and I'll fight mine.
Oh, listen, Ned. Don't you try to...
Thank you for putting me on the flag, Ned.
Of course, Klaus. It was my pleasure.
Yeah, but you stitched me onto the dolphin, and I want you to know how much that means to me.
Well, I'm very pleased you liked it.
Y-You're not listening. I didn't just like it. [Klaus salutes Ned] You understand?
Yes, I do. [Ned salutes in return] Thank you, Klaus.
Other characters in The Life Aquatic with Steve Zissou
More Owen Wilson characters
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Ken 'Hutch' Hutchinson
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Dignan
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