Alexander Scott quotes from I Spy (2002)

Alexander Scott

It's like you're a double-agent! It's like you're working against me!

Alexander Scott

This man is Arnold Gundars, premiere arms dealer. We believe he has the switchblade.

Alexander Scott

Oh! I think you broke my spine. [Rachel laughs] But in a good way.

Alexander Scott

That's the type of thing we're gonna be doing on the mission.

Alexander Scott

What you're about to hear is a national secret.

Alexander Scott

This is a who's who of the international bad boys club.

Kelly Robinson

Hey, what's this? It looks like a sock.

Alexander Scott

It's a secret spy mask, put it on.

Kelly Robinson

Hey man, this is a sock!

Rachel

There's one thing that will always make a man talk.

Alexander Scott

Cutting... my belt?

Kelly Robinson

Kelly Robinson.

Alexander Scott

Are you going to be referring to yourself in the third person, the whole time? Because that can get a little irritating.

Alexander Scott

Is this my stuff?

Oh, easy. This is Carlos' stuff. This is yours.

Alexander Scott

Where's my monofilament phone descender? And I didn't get one of these exploding pagers. I don't see one of those.

You got the micro GPS.

Alexander Scott

Micro?

This is your spy-cam.

Alexander Scott

This is Carlos' spy-cam, and this is my spy-cam? Look at the size of this thing! Size matters. But in the spy world, it's reversed. You want people to say, "Look how small and sexy and sleek this is." Not "How huge this is! Look at what he pulled out of his pants. It's huge!"

Kelly Robinson

You know, I was born semi-pyschic, and I had a bad hunch something was gonna happen in that room.

Alexander Scott

Then, why did you go into the room?

Kelly Robinson

I'm only semi-pyschic! I ain't Miss Cleo!

Hands up! What's going on here?

Alexander Scott

The black guy! The black guy mugged me!

Kelly Robinson

I'd like to file a complaint! Wait! [Being put into handcuffs] Why am I being arrested? Why am I the only one getting arrested? This is bullshit! He kicked me, too! He kicked me in my nuts! [Being put into police van] Why am I getting arrested if I got kicked in my nuts! How come you just arresting the black man?! My nuts was kicked!

Kelly Robinson

Hey, what's in that bag.

Alexander Scott

Spy stuff.

Kelly Robinson

I put this in my eye?

Alexander Scott

I got the camera in my eye.

Alexander Scott

Did you see that? That was a big explosion.

Kelly Robinson

Damn!

Kelly Robinson

Hey! That wasn't so bad!

Alexander Scott

Yeah! Are your legs numb?

Kelly Robinson

He's a bad guy, right?

Alexander Scott

I don't know. People are flip-flopping so much I lost track.

Kelly Robinson

What you doing hanging from the ceiling like that? What you doing?

Alexander Scott

No, don't walk in here.

Kelly Robinson

Let me tell you something man, you ain't gonna be telling me what to do all the time. I'm Kelly Robinson, don't talk to me like that. [Walks into a infra red security system] Oh, shit.

You called, Edna? You are a vision as always. Ah, Hello, Alex.

Alexander Scott

Hi, Carlos. How was Cuba?

Es... adequate.

Alexander Scott

Oh, my gosh.

Kelly Robinson

Yeah, that's what I'm talking about.