(After Felicity has kicked him in the genitals)
Oh-h-h-h-h-h-h-h! Right in the Mummy-Daddy button!
Austin Powers
Mike Myers · 39 quotes
Fat Bastard
Mike Myers · 37 quotes
Doctor Evil
Mike Myers · 29 quotes
Felicity
Heather Graham · 16 quotes
Basil
Michael York · 6 quotes
Scott
Seth Green · 6 quotes
Ivana
5 quotes
Frau
3 quotes
Robin Swallows
Gia Carides · 3 quotes
Most scenes together: Austin Powers & Fat Bastard (13), Austin Powers & Felicity (13), Doctor Evil & Fat Bastard (11)
Austin Powers: The Spy Who Shagged Me quotes
Page 1 of 6(Spinning out of control on his chair)
All I asked for was a fricking rotating chair, OK?! Okay, getting a little afraid. I need an old priest and a young priest. The power of Christ compels you! The power of Christ compels you! Whoa, hello! Okay, sick as a dog now. (spits) Okay. Gonna vom...
Vanessa No shit, Sherlock! (throws Austin aside and releases machine guns in breasts)
Machine gun jubblies? How did I miss those, baby?
Vanessa Perhaps next time you should try foreplay.
Right. (to himself) Oh, my God!
Dr. Evil's voice
("Vanessa" shoots her machine guns to Austin and stops firing as Austin uses the white flag to surrender)
Here's your wedding present, Mr. Powers. A kamikaze bride from me: Dr. Evil. (countdown reaches zero. Head explodes, destroying bits of the hotel room)
[about to travel back to 1969]
Wait a tick. Basil, if I travel back to 1969, and I was frozen in 1967, presumably, I could go visit my frozen self. But, if I'm still frozen in 1967, how could I have been unthawed in the 90's and traveled back to... [cross-eyed] Oh, no. I've gone cross-eyed.
I suggest you don't worry about this sort of thing, and just enjoy yourself. [to the home audience] That goes for you all, too.
Hello, Austin. How was your honeymoon?
It turns out that Vanessa was a fembot.
Yes. We knew all along, sadly. [then, without pausing for a moment] Anyway, I have a new assignment for you.
[as Mini-Me shoots a tranquilizer dart onto Mustafa's neck]
If you're preaching to the converted, then why are you being so slavish to the three question form? It's my question. You're not even looking at me, man. You're just being rude, you know that? You're not listening, man.
[Mustafa screams, falls off the edge of a cliff]
[Looking through binoculars around neck]
Dr. Evil's headquarters is just over that next ridge.
Let me look. [Pulls binoculars, with Austin, across]
Arrgh!
Damn it! [Pulls binoculars down] How do we get in?
[Stuck in Felicity's cleavage]
Hello, Mummy. Mummy, can I have some chocolate? I want some Mars bars!
Austin?
Don't smack my bottom, mummy!
Austin?
Let's look at the map. [Drags Austin, by the binoculars, into a tentpole.]
Oh, blimey!
[shooting photos]
Okay, you're an animal! Yes, there we go. You're a tiger! You're Tony the Tiger! You're grrreat! Very good. Loving it. Now you're a lemur. Running as a pack. We go left. We go right. There's a predator out of the jungle. What's going on? Burrow! That's right, you're a lemur. That's all you've got. You don't have sharp teeth capable of biting. Make an interconnected series of tunnels like the Viet Cong. And look. I'm not even shooting you. It's crazy. And I'm spent. [gives away a camera]
[visiting his frozen past self]
Look at yourself. You used to be so virile. You were a swinger, man. And now you're nothing. But at least it can't get any worse.
[Cuts to Felicity and Fat Bastard in bed]
According to this map, the entire island is crawling with Dr. Evil's guards.
I want to make sure the explosives didn't get wet, but I can't find them.
Look in the bottom.
Okay, I'll dig a little deeper. [from the view outside their tent, their silhouettes make it look like she's removing items from his rear end] Wow, this bag is really full.
Just keep digging, darling.
I'll just feel around for them. [taking a rope out of the bag] Good Lord, Austin. What sort of things do you keep in here?
Oh, anything that catches my fancy, you know. Give it a good tug.
I'll ask you not to open that inside, thank you very much. Okay.
Sorry.
Private Army Soldier [in disgust]
Oh, my God.
Yes, it does that from time to time.
Yes.
Yuck.
Yeah, that's nasty. Yeah, sorry about that.
Private Army Soldier [in disgust]
Oh, these people make me sick.
Can you snap me a beer? [Felicity opens one and takes a drink, then shrieks] What is it?
It's a gerbil. How did that get in your bag?
I...I don't know.
Let me ask you a question. And be honest. Do I make you horny, baby? Do I? Do I make you randy?
[gets up from the table]
No more games. Dr. Evil sent me here to kill you, but I find you so... [pause] sexy! Just make love to me. Now, Austin Powervich! Hurry! [Austin rips his shirt open] Oh, you are hairy like animal!
Grr, baby! Very grr!
Make love to me, monkey man!
Those are skin tight. How do you get into those pants baby?
You can start by buying me a drink.
[Austin exhales sharply and heavily]
Who sent you?!
Mustafa You'll have to kill me.
Who sent you?!
Mustafa Kiss my ass, Powers!
Who sent you?!
Mustafa Dr. Evil!
That was easy.
That was easy.
Why did you tell us?
Mustafa I can't stand to be asked the same question 3 times. It just irritates me.
Where is Dr. Evil hiding?
Mustafa Why would he tell me? I'm just one of his low-level functionaries.
Where is Dr. Evil hiding?
Mustafa You'll have to torture me. I'll never tell you.
Mustafa Damn! 3 times! He's hiding in the secret volcano lair.
Where is Dr. Evil's secret volcano lair?
Mustafa (spits)
I spit at the question.
Do I really have to ask you 2 more times?
Mustafa Go to hell, Powers.
Fine. Where is Dr. Evil's secret... volcano... lair?
Mustafa I will take it to the grave with me.
AHA! You have to answer. He asked you 3 times.
Mustafa No, no, no! The second question was: "Do I really have to ask you 2 more times?", so that would be the first question in a new line of questioning, and wouldn't count in the other line of questioning.
He's right.
I must have said something wrong, so he just left all of a sudden.
Listen, Felicity, I don't want you getting too close to Austin. It's not meant to be.
I don't get too close to anybody, Basil. My interest in this case is purely professional.
Good. Then you won't mind tracking down Fat Bastard tonight.
No problem.
We need you to plant this homing device on him by any means necessary.
No problem.
Keep up the good work. Remember, by any means necessary.
Sehr gut, Herr Doctor. (Very good, Doctor.)
How are things?
I have come to embrace the love that dare not speak its name. To my right is my lover. [reveals tough female] We met at the LPGA Tour. Her name is Unibrou. [Unibrou reveals her one-eyebrow]
Right on. Welcome Unibrou.
[Number Two looks around as if he thinks they're crazy]
Doctor, you, uh... [points to the nose]
What, what?
You've got a...little milk-nose...mustache.
[looks at himself in a mirror]
I know, I know. I meant to. That's how we drink it in Belgium. It's called a Belgian Dip.