Ernst Stavro Blofeld I've taught you to love chickens, to love their flesh, their voice.
Most-quoted role: Ernst Stavro Blofeld in On Her Majesty's Secret Service (1969), 16 quotes
Movies Ernst Stavro Blofeld Blofeld Now, if you're very, very nice to me. I could make you my Countess.
But I'm already a Countess.
Blofeld Whereas if you displease me, I can promise you a very different estate.
[Bond throws a knife and hits a calendar on a bookshelf, on the 14th day]
But today is the thirteenth, Commander.
I'm superstitious.
Well, what do you think, Oddball?
It's a wasted trip, baby. Nobody said nothing about locking horns with no Tigers.
Big Joe Hey look, you just keep them Tigers busy and we'll take care of the rest.
The only way I got to keep them Tigers busy is to let them shoot holes in me!
We just want you to keep them interested for a while, that's all.
PFC Moriarty Oh, man! You guys are crazy! When we was in the bocage country, we was assaulted by them Tigers! You know what I mean by "assaulted"? Well, I mean assaulted!
Why don't you knock it off with them negative waves? Why don't you dig how beautiful it is out here? Why don't you say something righteous and hopeful for a change?
PFC Moriarty Crap!
All right, so it's a beautiful day. Now, let's get down to cases. The Tiger is an open-country tank. We happen to have these and a small town with narrow streets. And we do have the element of surprise.
Look, Kelly, a Tiger has only one weak point. That's its ass. You've got to hit it point blank and you've got to hit it from behind. Now we do not have the element of surprise. They will hear our Detroit motors long before we ever even get inside that town.
What if I can show you a way to get into that town so they don't hear you?
Hey, Oddball, this is your hour of glory. And you're chickening out!
To a New Yorker like you, a hero is some type of weird sandwich! Not some nut who takes on three Tigers.
Nobody's asking you to be a hero.
No? Then you sit up in that turret, baby.
No, because you're gonna be up there, baby, and I'll be right outside showing you which way to go.
Yeah?
Yeah.
Crazy... I mean like, so many positive waves... maybe we can't lose, you're on!
Big Joe [Kelly, Big Joe and Oddball approach the last Tiger in the open; a turret hatch opens and the Tiger's commander climbs out to meet them.]
Cigarette?
German Tank Commander
No smoke. The fuel system is rotten. We have gasoline all over the place.
Big Joe S'all right. Hey, look, Max, you and us we're just soldiers, right? We don't even know what this war's all about. All we do is we fight and we die and for what? We don't get anything out of it. Now, in about half an hour, the whole American Army's gonna be coming down that road. So why don't you do yourself a big fat favor, huh? And get the hell outta here?
German Tank Commander
I have orders. This bank isn't to fall into the hands of the American Army.
Sergeant, this bank's not gonna fall into the hands of the American Army. It's gonna fall into our hands. You see, we're just a private enterprise operation.
German Tank Commander
You- the American Army.
No, baby, we ain't. You know what's inside that bank, man? There's 16 million dollars' worth of gold in that bank, sweetheart.
Big Joe That's about 65 million Marks.
And Sergeant, all you have to do to have an equal share of this money, is to crank this turret around and blow a hole in that door.
Big Joe Yeah, just a few little things, Kelly. According to this map, we got a river to cross before we get into this town of yours.
Well, there's a bridge right here, six miles out.
Big Joe There was a bridge. The Air Corps knocked every bridge out of that river months ago.
Uh-uh, intelligence reports the Air Corps knocking 'em out by day and the Germans rebuilding 'em at night. Now, all we have to do is be there tomorrow morning at dawn and we got ourselves a bridge.
Big Joe Oh! Well, how about the German Army? Do you think they'd mind us crossing their bridge there, eh, Kelly?
Probably.
Big Joe You know something, Kelly? I think you're crazy. Better yet, I think I'm crazy! How the hell I ever let you talk the guys into this?! Push 30 miles behind enemy lines, take a bridge held by the Germans and then go into a town we don't know how many German soldiers are guarding!
Well, I figure there's between 30 and 40 troops in that town.
Big Joe All right, how'd you figure that?
Well, it's of no military importance, it's not big enough for a garrison-
Big Joe You still didn't answer the question! How'd you figure 30 or 40 men?
Because that's the normal amount of support for three Tiger tanks.
Big Joe [Aghast]
Tigers? Where'd the hell the Tigers come from?!
Well, that's why we have Oddball and his Shermans.
Big Joe Does he know about the Tigers?
Not yet, no.
Big Joe You bet your sweet ass he doesn't, or he'd be still on that funny-farm of his! He may be nuts, but he's not crazy enough to put Shermans up against Tigers! You know once those things get rolling, they'll blow that whole town to pieces, including us, Kelly!
Oh, you're too smart to let that happen, Joe.
Big Joe Oh, wow...
You'll figure us a way in and out of that town, and I know you've got a good head for tactics.
Big Joe Yeah? And I intend to keep it right here on my shoulders, Kelly! With these Tigers, this operation goes above and beyond the call of duty!
Captain Kazan He knows that a horse has four legs. He knows that a murderer has two arms. But still, the Devil must be afraid of one honest Cossack.
Captain Kazan Now, anything, anything that moves near that door, kill it!
But what if the monk is innocent?
Captain Kazan Ahhh, we got lots of innocent monks!
Archer J. Maggot It's judgment day, sinners! Come out, come out wherever you are!
Any questions?
Maggot Suh? Do we have to eat with ****hs?
Sergeant Clyde Bowren [Jefferson jumps Maggot] [as Reisman exits the room]
What's going on, sir?
Oh, the gentleman from the South had a question about the dining arrangements. He and his comrades are discussing place settings now.