ALL A B C D E F G H I J K L M
N O P Q R S T U V W X Y Z #


View Quote Maj. Gen. Worden: This war was not started for your private gratification, and you can be damned sure it's not being run for your personal convenience, either!
View Quote Col. Everett Dasher Breed: Reisman! Some people may consider you a first-class officer. But as far as I'm concerned, you're a disorganized, undisciplined clown. I'm gonna' make it my business to run you out of this Army.
Major John Reisman: I owe you an apology, colonel. I always thought that you were a cold, unimaginative, tight-lipped officer. But you're really quite emotional, aren't you?
View Quote Gen. Denton: Major Reisman is heading toward a court martial of his own. He's the most ill-mannered, ill-disciplined officer that it's ever been my displeasure to meet.
Maj. Gen. Worden: You think so, Denton? You may be right. But he's sure right about one thing. Somebody up there must be a raving lunatic.
View Quote Major John Reisman: [briefing the dozen] And kill any officer in sight.
Victor R. Franko: Ours or theirs?
View Quote Major John Reisman: [Kinder has just finished a psychiatric evaluation of Reisman's troops] So what does that give you?
Capt. Stuart Kinder: Doesn't give me anything. But along with these other results, it gives you just about the most twisted, anti-social bunch of psychopathic deformities I have ever run into! And the worst, the most dangerous of the bunch, is Maggott. You've got one religious maniac, one malignant dwarf, two near-idiots... and the rest I don't even wanna think about!
Major John Reisman: Well, I can't think of a better way to fight a war.
Capt. Stuart Kinder: These people don't know their enemy is the Germans. They think the enemy is their own United States Army!
Major John Reisman: Maybe that's because the Germans haven't done anything to them yet.
View Quote Major John Reisman: Any questions?
Maggot: Suh? Do we have to eat with ****hs?
[Jefferson jumps Maggot]
Sergeant Clyde Bowren: [as Reisman exits the room] What's going on, sir?
Major John Reisman: Oh, the gentleman from the South had a question about the dining arrangements. He and his comrades are discussing place settings now.
View Quote Major John Reisman: How come you speak German?
Joseph T. Wladislaw: My old man came from Silesia. He didn't speak German, he didn't dig coal. If he didn't dig coal, he didn't eat.
View Quote Major John Reisman: Posey, what did they lock you up for? I mean, what did you do?
Samson Posey: I already told you that sir.
Major John Reisman: Well tell me again. I'm sure your friends over here would like to know too.
Samson Posey: This fella kept pushing me. I don't like to be pushed so I hit him.
Major John Reisman: Killed a man with your bare hands because he shoved you?
Samson Posey: I only hit him once.
Major John Reisman: Only him him once. And drove his jawbone right through his brain because he pushed him.
View Quote Major John Reisman: What do you think, Sergeant?
Sergeant Clyde Bowren: I think you'll do just fine, sir.
Major John Reisman: [emphatically] Don't give me that! I said what do you think?
Sergeant Clyde Bowren: I think the first chance one of those lovers gets, he's going to shoot the Major right in the head... sir.
View Quote Major John Reisman: Which one of you guys wants to be a general? [Pinkley raises his hand] Pinkley?
Pinkley: What kind of general, sir?
Major John Reisman: Just a plain, ordinary, every day, home-lovin' American general.
Pinkley: I'd rather be a civilian, sir.
View Quote Samson Posey: I don't want to hurt you Major.
Major John Reisman: You're not gonna hurt me, I'm gonna hurt you.
View Quote [after being given his mission]
Maj. Gen. Worden: What do you say, Major?
Major John Reisman: lt confirms a suspicion l've had for some time now, sir.
Maj. Gen. Worden: Think we might share that suspicion? l think you should.
Major John Reisman: Since we are over here to try to win the war, it shouldn't be advertised that someone we work for is a raving lunatic.
View Quote Hey! What's the matter with you? You think I want to die? Ha! If you think that then you don't know Victor Franko.
View Quote I never went in for embroidery, just results.
View Quote I reckon the folks'd be a sight happier if I died like a soldier. Can't say I would.