Steve Guttenberg movie quotes

19 quotes from 4 movies

Short Circuit (1986) as Newton Crosby

View Quote Originally I had non-military purposes in mind. I designed it as a marital aid.

View Quote Newton: [Speaking about the robots] It doesn't get sad, it doesn't get happy, Ben and Newton: [In unison] It just runs programs!

View Quote Crosby: Where are you from, anyway?
Ben: Bakersfield, originally.
Crosby: No, I mean your ancestors.
Ben: Oh, them. Pittsburgh.

All 8 quotes from Newton Crosby »

Police Academy (1984) as Carey Mahoney

View Quote Did anyone tell you what a great tailor you have, Sir?

View Quote It fits. The damned thing fits, and I thought there were no more spaces. Am I an idiot or what?

View Quote It depends. Sir? I hope this isn't going to be too personal? I heard what you said about my little butt and I don't know how to break this to you, sir, but I'm straight

All 6 quotes from Carey Mahoney »

It Takes Two (1995) as Roger

View Quote [Roger and Vincenzo watch Amanda as Alyssa banging on the piano keys at the engagement party]
Roger: You think maybe my daughter's asking for a little attention?
Vincenzo: I'd say she's demandin' it.
[Amanda bangs the final notes]
Roger: Hmm.

View Quote Roger: I made my money the old fashion way - pure dumb luck.

View Quote [after the macaroni spills on Roger's head, Diane laughs and snorts as quietly as she can]
Roger: Excuse me, ma'am. Did you just snort?
[Diane shakes her head, snorts, and laughs again]
Roger: I suppose you think this is funny? [picks up a butterknife w/a bit of butter on it] Well, maybe you'll get a little chuckle outta this.
Diane: You wouldn't dare.
[Roger flings the butter on her; Diane yelps]
Diane: FOOD FIGHT!!!
[a food fight breaks out]

All 4 quotes from Roger »

Cocoon: The Return (1988) as Jack Bonner

View Quote You're my favorite Martian.