Theodore [after meeting Eleanor]
She's like a beautiful green gumdrop.
Theodore Theodore [after the Eagles' mascot falls down the stairs]
That wasn't very fun-ish.
Theodore We can play Monopoly. We play Monopoly with Dave all the time.
Theodore I've always wanted a mom.
Theodore [rips a big one and giggles]
Sorry. Pizza toots.
Hello, New Orleans! Direct from our Austin to Miami Combat Tour, we're The Chipmunks! [people of New Orleans cheering]
Theodore Is everybody ready to get their funk on?
Theodore Where are we?
Well, I think they remodeled our forest. I like it. Stylish, yet functional--
Theodore Uh, but where did the mountains go?
Give me a break. We're in a building, Theodore.
We're getting off on the wrong foot. Allow us to introduce ourselves. Hello. I'm Simon. The smart one. He's Alvin.
The awesomest one.
Theodore And I'm Theodore.
Dave
Oh, nice to meet you. Now get outta my house!
Theodore But... we talk.
Dave
Which only makes me want you out of my house that much more. It's creepy. Unnatural. Somewhat evil.
I kinda liked him better when he was unconcious.
Dave
[on seeing weird pellet]
Oh, my God! Theodore, did you just...
Theodore Um, um...
It's a raisin, Dave.
Dave
Prove it.
Dave
Okay, you got me. Look, I wanna talk to all of you guys. Where's Alvin? Alvin!
Dave
Alvin?!
[takes a shower in dishwasher; sings]
Don'tcha wish your girlfriend was hot like me? Don'tcha wish your girlfriend was a freak like me...
Dave
Get out!
Uh, I'm waiting for the rinse cycle.
Dave
Out! [pulls Alvin out of the dishwasher]
Whoa, whoa! I'm takin' a shower, here!
Dave
You know, if I made a list of my worst days ever, guess what? Today would be at the top of the list!
And it's still early.
Dave
Clam it, sudsy!
Theodore Um, Eleanor, would you like to dance?
Eleanor I'd love to.
Theodore With me?
Eleanor (throws her clutches)
Yes, Theodore!
Theodore Did you guys want some? (All groan)
[Theodore has woken up, he rubs his eyes and walks to Simon.]
Flight Attendant [Last lines: Dave, the Chipmunks and the Chipettes are flying home; Dave tries to put the chipmunks' tiny suitcases in the overhead locker]
I'm sorry, sir. That's full. We're gonna have to gate check those.
Dave
[sighs]
Are you gonna charge me $25 a bag?
Flight Attendant Of course not, sir. It's $25 for the first bag, and $40 for each additional bag.
But of course.
[Simon jumps up to adjust the vent, but pushes a book before Brittany aside while landing]
Oh, you wrinkled my business magazine!
Heh, sorry.
[pushes book aside revealing a magazine with herself on the cover]
Guess I'll have to read this. Oh, she's pretty. Oh wait, that's me.
Dave
Alright, head count.
Theodore [appears wearing a monster costume made out of a bag]
BOO! [roars until Dave removes the bag] You like my jungle monster costume? Eleanor made it for me.
Eleanor Yeah! Out of the barf bag!
Dave
Yeah, nice. [tosses bag aside and does a head count] Where's Alvin?
[over intercom]
Ladies and gentlemen, this is your captain speaking: we're cleared for an untimed departure for Timbuktu. If Timbuktu is not for you, please alert the flight attendant by pressing your call button.
Dave
[The passengers do so]
Alvin...
Flight Attendant Sir, please return to your seat, we're about to take off.
Flight Attendant [Alvin jumps off the food cart, accidentally pressing the release lever]
Sit, now!
Uh-oh.
Dave
But he–
Flight Attendant Sit!
Dave
[The cart rolls down the aisle]
No, no, no! [The cart crashes into him] ALVIN!! [Alvin smiles nervously; the plane takes off]