Jessica Rabbit I love you more than any woman's ever loved a rabbit.
4th most-quoted character in Who Framed Roger Rabbit (1988): in 18 of its 110 quotes
Most scenes with: Eddie Valiant (8), Roger Rabbit (5), Judge Doom (2)
C'mon, Roger. Let's go home. I'll bake ya a carrot cake [Roger chuckles...].
More lines from Jessica Rabbit
6 quotes Jessica Rabbit Jessica Rabbit I'm not bad. I'm just drawn that way.
Jessica Rabbit [To Roger, Eddie Valiant having saved her life]
My hero! [To Roger] Oh, honey bunny!
Jessica Rabbit [upon seing the vat of "dip"]
Oh my God...IT'S DIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIP!!!!!!!
Jessica Rabbit Mr. Valiant? [madly slaps Eddie in the face] I hope you're proud of yourself. And those pictures you took.
Jessica Rabbit I think... I'm gonna faint.
Scenes with Jessica Rabbit
11 scenes
Weren't you the one I caught playing patty-cake with old man Acme?
Jessica Rabbit You didn't catch me, Mr. Valiant. You were set up to take those pictures.
What are you talking about?
Jessica Rabbit Maroon wanted to blackmail Acme. I didn't want to have anything to do with it, but he said that if I didn't pose for those patty-cake pictures, Roger would never work in this town again. I couldn't let that happen. I'd do anything for my husband, Mr. Valiant. Anything.
Jessica Rabbit You don't know how hard it is being a woman looking the way I do.
You don't know how hard it is being a man looking at a woman looking the way you do.
Jessica Rabbit I'm not bad. I'm just drawn that way.
Seriously, what do you see in that guy?
Jessica Rabbit He makes me laugh.
Jessica Rabbit Well, we're not going anywhere in my car. Let's take yours.
I have a feeling someone already did.
Jessica Rabbit From the looks of it I'd say it was Roger. My honey bunny was never very good behind the wheel.
Better lover than a driver, huh?
Jessica Rabbit You'd better believe it, buster.
Jessica Rabbit Oh, no. Where's Roger?
Roger? He chickened out on me back at the studio.
Jessica Rabbit No, he didn't. I hit him in the head with a frying pan and put him in the trunk, so he wouldn't get hurt.
Makes perfect sense.
Can you guess what this is?
Jessica Rabbit Oh my God, it's DIP!!!
That's right, my dear! Enough to dip Toontown off the face of the earth! A vehicle of my own design. Five thousand gallons of heated dip, pumped at enormous velocity through a pressurized water cannon. Toontown will be erased in a matter of minutes.
Okay, nobody move! All right, weasel, grab some sky or I'll let the judge have it! You heard me, I said drop it!
Jessica Rabbit Roger, darling!
That's right, my dear. I'd love to embrace you, but first, I have to satisfy my sense of moral outrage!
Put that gun down, you buck-toothed fool!
That's it, Doom. Give me another excuse to pop you full of lead. So you thought you could get away with it, didn't you? Ha! We toons may act idiotic, but we're not stupid. We demand justice. Why, the real meaning of the word probably hits you like a "ton of bricks"!
Jessica Rabbit [a ton of bricks falls on Roger]
Roger! Roger, say something!
Look, stars! Ready when you are, Raoul.
Tie the lovebirds together.
(calliope begins playing "The Merry Go Round Broke Down")
Now Roger is his name/And laughter is his game/Come on you dope, untie his rope/And watch him go insane.
Jessica Rabbit (does slapstick pratfalls to make the weasels laugh)
He's lost his mind.
I don't think so.
This singing's not my line/It's tough to make a rhyme/If I get stuck, I'm out of luck--
Jessica I'm running out of time!
Thanks!
(more pratfalls; weasels start dying of laughter)
Hey, Eddie, keep it up! You're killing 'em! You're slaying 'em! You're knocking 'em dead!
I'm through with taking falls/And bouncing off the walls/Without that gun I'd have some fun/I'd kick you in the-- *gets hit in head with vase*
Nose!
Nose? That don't rhyme with walls!
No, but this does!
(kicks Smart Ass in the groin, sending him flying, screaming, into the Dip Mixer, which then dissolves him)
Jessica Rabbit [When all is over]
Oh, Roger, you were magnificent.
Was I, really?
Jessica Rabbit Better than Goofy.
[Bongo the Gorilla spots Eddie for peeping through the keyhole of the door to Jessica Rabbit's dressing room at the Ink and Paint club.]
What do you think you're doing, chump?
Who are you callin' a chump, chimp?
[Bongo opens the door and throws the screaming Eddie out of the Ink and Paint club.]
And don't let me catch your peepin' face around here again! Got it? [closes the door]
OOGA-BOOGA!
Marvin
Come, my dear, Jessica. Over here. I have everything ready. Right here, on the bed.
Jessica [tired out]
Oh, not tonight, Marvin. I have a headache.
Marvin
Oh, Jessica, you promised.
Jessica Oh, all right. But this time, take off that hand buzzer.
[Eddie stands by the window and takes pictures of them playing patty-cake] [surprised]
You gotta be kidding me.
[In Maroon's office; Roger is crying after finding out Jessica playing patty-cake with Marvin Acme] [crying; struggles the window blinds]
Patty-cake! Patty-cake! I don't believe it! [heads to bang his head on his desk] Patty-cake! Patty-cake! Is that true?!
Take comfort, son. You're not the first man whose wife played patty cake on him.
[Maroon hands Roger his handkerchief, he uses it to blow his nose couple times. He hands it back dripping with water and Maroon hands it to Eddie.]
I just don't believe it. I won't believe it. I can't believe it. I shan't believe it!
[drops the wet handkerchief in the bin]
Believe it, kid. I took the pictures myself. She played patty cake.
[looks at couple pictures of Jessica and Marvin]
No... not my Jessica! Not patty cake. This is impossible. I don't believe it. It can't be. It just can't be. Jessica's my wife! It's absolutely impossible! [throws pictures into the air] Jessica's the light of my life, the apple of my eye, the cream in my coffee.
You better start drinking it black, 'cause Acme's taking the cream now.
Hard to believe. Marvin Acme's been my friend and neighbor for 30 years. Who would've thought he was a sugar daddy?
Somebody must have made her do it.
[hands Roger a glass of whiskey]
Now drink this, son. It'll make ya feel better.
[Roger takes a shot of the glass of whiskey. He turns a variety of different colors and his eyes bulge. He suddenly shoots into the air and emits a whistling sound so high pitched that it smashes all the glasses, saucers, picture frames and awards since 1923 in the room including the one held by Valiant and the glass awards on the shelves, broken lamp since 1912 and the bottle of beer. As the whistling dies down Roger collapses back into the seat and mutters...]
[shakes the whiskey off of his hands]
Son of a bitch. Look, Mr. Maroon, I think my work here is finished. How about that carrot you owe me, huh?
A deal's a deal. [hands Eddie the check]
Thanks.
Roger. I know all this seems pretty painful now. But you'll find someone new. Won't he, Mr. Valiant?
Yeah, sure. A good looking guy like that? [chuckles] The dames'll be breaking his door down.
[suddenly comes to life; angered]
Dames?! What dames?! [grabs Eddie by the collar] Jessica's the only one for me! You'll see! We'll rise above this pickling peccadillo! We're going to be happy again! You got that? Happy! Capital H-A-P-P-I!
[Roger crashes through the window, leaving a rabbit shaped hole in the glass and the blinds from smashing window.]
Well, at least he took it well.
[Eddie and Maroon stare dumbfounded out of the window the blinds crash down.] [while crying, looking at his pictures of him and Jessica; wedding, honeymoon and nightclub]
Oh, Jessica. Please tell me it's not true. P-p-p-please?
Does this answer your question? [Valiant gives him a big kiss.]
Yech! Hoo hoo hoo!
Jessica Come on, Roger, let's go home. I'll bake you a carrot cake.
