Beverly Sutphin Officer, I'm sorry, but we don't allow gum in this house.
Played by Kathleen Turner 
Serial Mom (1994) · 27 quotes
Serial Mom (1994) · 27 quotes
Most-quoted character in Serial Mom (1994): in 15 of its 27 quotes
Most scenes with: Chip (4), Dottie Hinkle (2)
Life doesn't have to be ugly. Look at the birds out there; listen to their call. [makes bird noises] Wee, wee, wee, wee.
More lines from Beverly Sutphin
5 quotes Beverly Sutphin Beverly Sutphin [after murdering someone]
I don't know what it is about today but I feel great!
Beverly Sutphin Are those... pussy willows?
Beverly Sutphin [after bludgeoning Mrs. Jenson]
Rewind!
Beverly Sutphin Suzanne! This is my bad side!
Scenes with Beverly Sutphin
9 scenes
Eugene Listen to this, [reading from the newspaper] "Hillside Strangler gets his college degree in prison".
Beverly That's nice, dear.
Eugene Nice? He should have been executed!
Misty He killed people, mom!
Beverly We all have our bad days.
Beverly Sutphin Is this the **** residence?
God damn you! Stop calling here!
Beverly Sutphin Isn't this 4215 Pussy Way?
You bitch!
Beverly Sutphin Now let me check the zip code. Two-one-two-****-you?
The police are tracing this call this very minute.
Beverly Sutphin Well, Dottie Hinkle, then why aren't they here, huh, ****face?
**** YOU! [hangs up]
Beverly Sutphin [laughs manically]
Beverly Sutphin [in a different voice]
I beg your pardon!
Who is this?
Beverly Sutphin Mrs. Wilson from the telephone company. We understand you're having some trouble with an obscene phone caller?
Oh, Mrs. Wilson, I'm so sorry. These calls are driving me crazy! I'm a divorced woman, please help me.
Beverly Sutphin Well what exactly does this sick individual say to you?
I can't say the words out loud, I don't use bad language.
Beverly Sutphin Oh yes, I know it's difficult, but we need to know the exact words.
I'll try. ****, that's what she calls me.
Beverly Sutphin [reverting to the original voice]
Listen to your filthy mouth, you ****in' whore!
Goddamn you!
Beverly Sutphin Mother ****er!
**** sucker!
So happy I could shit.
Beverly Chip! You know how I hate the brown word.
Misty Mother! It's Carl! He's dead!
Beverly How horrible. Oh, I just sold the Peewee Herman doll!
You know Mom, Scotty thinks you're the killer.
Beverly [laughs]
Does he? You know, for someone who doesn't wear his seatbelt Scotty sure is nosy.
Tell me the truth, Mom. Really, it's okay with me. Are you a serial killer?
Beverly Chip, the only serial I know anything about is Rice Krispies!
Birdie You're bigger than Freddy and Jason now! Only you're a real person!
Beverly Do you think I need a lawyer?
You need an agent!
Beverly Mrs. Hinkle, do you drink?
No, I don't.
Beverly So you weren't drunk when you received those alleged obscene phone calls?
I certainly was not.
Beverly You mean to tell me the day I came over to Mrs. Ackerman's, the day you claim you recognized my voice, you weren't drinking?
One beer with lunch is hardly drinking.
Beverly So you do drink?
Socially. I'll have a beer.
Beverly So you admit you just lied?
No I don't, you bitch!
Judge
Watch your mouth, Mrs. Hinkle.
[Beverly whispers "**** you" to Dottie]
Did you see her?! She just said "**** you" to me!
Beverly Let the record show I'm merely standing here!
**** you too, you whore!
Judge
I'm warning you, Mrs. Hinkle. One more obscenity and I'll charge you with contempt of court.
Beverly Mrs. Hinkle, are you insane?
No I'm not, you mother ****er!
Beverly You can't wear white shoes after Labor Day!
Juror #8 That's not true anymore.
Beverly Yes it is! Didn't your mother tell you?
Juror #8 No! Please! Fashion has changed!
Beverly No, it hasn't.
