Tied for 5th most-quoted character in UHF (1989): in 4 of its 65 quotes
Most scenes with: R.J. Fletcher (3)
Scenes with Richard Fletcher
4 scenes
How could you do this to me? I knew this was gonna happen.
You're right, Bob. I'm sorry. What can I say? I-I'm a miserable worthless hunk of slime. Here, I want you to take this crowbar and just bash my head right in. Go ahead. Really. Just BASH my head right in.
George, you know I can't do that. You still owe me 5 bucks.
Beginner's class today, huh?
Yeah! They're so stupid! [A karate student is thrown out the window, it smashes and he falls to the pavement] STUPID!!!
You idiot! Can't you do anything I tell you to do?! Does this look like a Number 2 pencil?!
Richard Fletcher No... but... I just thought --
You thought?! I don't [snaps pencil in two] pay you to think!
Richard Fletcher But, Dad...
This is an embarrassment! A disgrace! What do you think R.J. Fletcher Senior would be saying if he were alive today?
Richard Fletcher "Help me out of this box, I can't breathe in here. Help, let me out."
[laughing smugly with a present in hand]
Aw, Richard. You shouldn't have.
Richard Fletcher Happy Fathers Day, Daaaad.
[looks in the box, throws the present back at his son]
What is this piece of crap?! I thought I told you I wanted a Rolex! A Rolex! [a knock on R.J.'s office door] What?!
SE Station Employee
[A station employee opens the door cautiously and sheepishly, wearing a large white cowboy hat with a big feather band and a raccoon tail.]
Sir?
SE Station Employee
I just thought I ought to tell you sir, that there's been a lot of talk on the street about this Channel 62. They're... they're starting to get a pretty strong following.
Excuse me? Did you say Channel 62?
SE Station Employee
Uh huh...
Do I have to remind you, that we are a network affiliate? And we are in competition with other networks, not with a bunch of punks, broadcasting out of a closet!
SE Station Employee
But, s..s..s..
Do you enjoy wasting my time? Get out of my office! [employee starts to leave] And take that ridiculous thing off!
[The station employee stops, waits a minute, then takes off...his mustache and leaves!]
Richard Fletcher [sarcastically, after having tripped up Noodles Macintosh]
Awwwww, did I do that? Oopsie!
