[accepting an award]
Ohhh, there's so many people to thank. First of all, my fabulous supporting cast, who gives a new meaning to the word "support"...
Ariel Maloney [At their table]
Bitch!
Hag!
I hate her so much!
Played by Teri Hatcher 
Soapdish (1991) · 17 quotes
Soapdish (1991) · 17 quotes
8th most-quoted character in Soapdish (1991): in 3 of its 17 quotes
Most scenes with: David Barnes (2), Jeffrey Anderson (2), Montana Moorehead (2)
Scenes with Ariel Maloney
3 scenes Ariel Maloney Ariel Maloney New boy in town?
Just got off the choo-choo... you have lovely eyes.
Ariel Maloney They're nothing compared to my tits! You should come up and see them sometime.
[as Lori, Celeste, And Jeffrey kiss and make up]
WAIT! Wait! But I'm carrying his child!
I didn't sleep with her! Will somebody please believe me?!
[offstage, delighted]
This is what I meant. This is what I told them to do. This is soap opera!
Ariel Maloney A second opinion... this is Dr. Frans Blau of the sex change clinic in Bethesda, Maryland.
[German accent]
Thank you. Dr. Randall, after extensive investigations, I've come to the conclusion that it's virtually impossible for you to have impregnated your nurse, Montana Moorehead, because before she came to our little clinic, she was... Milton Moorehead of Syosset, Long Island.
[Rose opens the high school yearbook showing Montana's teenage boy photo] [normal voice]
Hello.
Are you okay?
