Brick Top In the quiet words of the Virgin Mary... come again?
Played by Alan Ford 
Snatch (2000) · 129 quotes
Snatch (2000) · 129 quotes
Tied for 4th most-quoted character in Snatch (2000): in 19 of its 129 quotes
Most scenes with: Turkish (5), Errol (3)
Do you know what nemesis means? A righteous infliction of retribution manifested by an appropriate agent. Personified in this case by an 'orrible **** — me.
More lines from Brick Top
7 quotes Brick Top Brick Top I don't care if he's Muhammad I'm Hard Bruce Lee. You can't change fighters.
Brick Top [to Turkish]
You are on thin **** ice, my pedigree chums, and I shall be under it when it breaks!
Brick Top Goody gumdrops. Get us a cup of tea, will ya, Errol?
Brick Top Listen here you **** fringe, if I throw a dog a bone, I don't want to know if it tastes good or not. You stop me again whilst I'm walking and I'll cut your **** jacobs off.
Brick Top No thanks Turkish. I'm sweet enough.
Brick Top I'm gonna be watching you, and I don't care where you go. You can **** off to Tibet, and I shall have men, nutters, from Parkhurst, dressed in yeti suits, up Everest, with meat cleavers ready to chop your tarty ****in' legs off!
Scenes with Brick Top
11 scenes Brick Top Pull your tongue out of my arsehole, Gary. Dogs do that. You're not a dog are ya Gary?
Gary
No, no I'm not.
Brick Top However, you have all the characteristics of a dog, Gary... All except loyalty.
[Errol zaps Gary] [Narrating]
It's rumored that Brick Top's favorite means of dispatch involves a stun gun, a plastic bag, a roll of tape, and a pack of hungry pigs.
Brick Top You're a ruthless little **** Liam. I'll give ya that. But I got no time for grassers. Feed 'em to the pigs Errol... [turns to face the boxers in the ring] What the **** are you two looking at?
[In a pig farm, Brick Top is negotiating with Turkish while feeding the corpses to the pigs] [narrating]
If you got to deal with him, just gotta make sure you don't end up owing him. 'Cause then you're in his debt. Which means, you're in his pocket. And once you're in there, you ain't ever coming out.
Brick Top I hear he's a good fighter, so I'm gonna use him. I'll be doing you a favour, boy.
[narrating]
What he means is, I'm doing him a favour. 'Cause everybody knows nobody takes a dive in my fights, unlike his.
Brick Top Here, Errol. I don't think he likes me. You don't like me, do you, boy?
Don't know what you mean.
Brick Top I'd like my fights to finish prompt so we can get the punters out before the authorities find out. Now play your cards right and I'll sort you out.
[narrating]
You can sort me out by showing me out. It's hard enough to make a living in a boxing world, so every now and then you gotta do something that might not agree with your principles. Basically, you have to forget you got any.
Are they Lancashire pigs?
Brick Top Who the ****'s talking to you, boy?
Brick Top Now don't let me down. You don't want to let me down, do you, boy?
We've lost Gorgeous George.
Brick Top [Motions for silence]
You'll have to say that again, I don't think I heard you?
We've lost Gorgeous George.
Brick Top Well where'd ya lose him? He's ain't a set of car keys, is he? It's not as if he's incon-****-spicuous, now is it?
You take sugar?
Brick Top No thank you, Turkish; I'm sweet enough.
Brick Top I've got a bare-knuckle fight in a couple of days, I wanna use the pikey.
All right, of course.
Brick Top Of course **** of course. I wasn't asking, I was telling.
Brick Top [After cleaning out Turkish's safe]
He's been quite a busy little bastard, that Turkish.
I think you've let him get away with enough, Gov'nor.
Brick Top It'll get you in a lot of trouble thinking, Errol. I wouldn't do too much of it.
Brick Top [Looking at a surveillance tape of the bookies]
Do you know these tits, Errol?
I know a lot of tits, Gov'nor. But I don't know quite any as **** stupid as these two.
Brick Top John?
John I can't help, Guv.
[Until Tyrone appears onscreen]
Ah. Tyrone.
John and Errol [simultaneously]: You silly fat bastard.
Brick Top You're always gonna have problems lifting a body in one piece. Apparently the best thing to do is cut up a corpse into six pieces and pile it all together.
Would someone mind telling me, who are ya?
Brick Top And when you got your six pieces, you gotta get rid of them, because it's no good leaving it in the deep freeze for your mum to discover, now is it? Then I hear the best thing to do is feed them to pigs. You got to starve the pigs for a few days, then the sight of a chopped-up body will look like curry to a pisshead. You gotta shave the heads of your victims, and pull the teeth out for the sake of the piggies' digestion. You could do this afterwards, of course, but you don't want to go sievin' through pig shit, now do you? They will go through bone like butter. You need at least sixteen pigs to finish the job in one sitting, so be wary of any man who keeps a pig farm. They will go through a body that weighs 200 pounds in about eight minutes. That means that a single pig can consume two pounds of uncooked flesh every minute. Hence the expression, "as greedy as a pig".
[Slightly stunned pause]
Well... thank you for that. That's a real weight off me mind. Now I mean, wouldn't you mind telling me exactly who the **** you are, apart from someone who feeds people to pigs, of course.
Brick Top What do you think, Errol?
I think we should drip dry 'em, Guv'nor. While we've got the chance.
Brick Top [exasperated]
It was a rhetorical question, Errol. What have I told you about thinking?
Brick Top [Into cell phone]
Pete, talk to me.
Darren [At gypsy campsite, holding Pete at gunpoint]: If ya want yer friend to hear ya, you'll have to talk a lot louder than that. [shoots Pete]
Brick Top Gimme that **** shooter.
Pikey
[Rolls down window]
I'll give you that **** shooter, you **** yea.
[Shoots Brick Top]
