Wilma Flintstone quotes from The Flintstones (1994)

View Quote Fred! And promise me you won't say anything like you did when you saw my sister's baby.

View Quote [Miss Stone tells her she's heard so much about her] Well I wish that I could say the same.

View Quote Dino: Huh?
Fred Flintstone: Wilma! I'm home! No, Dino! No, no! No, Dino! Bad boy! Bad dog! Good doggie! Bad Dino breath.
Wilma Flintstone: Fred! Do you have to get Dino so wound up when you come home?
Fred Flintstone: It's not my fault. Maybe he'd calm down if we had him fixed!
Dino: What?
Fred Flintstone: Here comes the big Daddysaurus!
Wilma Flintstone: How was your day, dear?
Fred Flintstone: I think my Brontocrane's pregnant again. I tell ya, you forget to lock her up one Saturday night...
Wilma Flintstone: Comfortable, Fred?
Fred Flintstone: On my way. All I need's a brew and a good scratch. Which one do you want to do first?
Wilma Flintstone: It does my heart good to see you relaxing after a hard day at the quarry.
Fred Flintstone: I'm telling you, I married the pick of the litter.
Wilma Flintstone: Fred, our garbage disposal has been acting up a lot lately, so I decided that it was time to buy a new one. But when I went to take money out of our savings account... Guess what?
Fred Flintstone: New garbage disposal? New garbage disposal? Why throw good money down the drain? There's nothing wrong with this one. All right, you. Say "ahh."
Pigasaurus: Uh-uh.
Wilma Flintstone: Do you have any idea why there's no money in our savings account?
Fred Flintstone: There's your problem right there. All right, you! Spit it out!
Wilma Flintstone: Where's the money, Fred?
Fred Flintstone: Something happened to it. There, I said it.
Wilma Flintstone: We have scrimped and saved for that money. And every time we get ahead, you have to go blow it on some hare-brained scheme!
Fred Flintstone: Now, see here, Wilma! In this cave, I am the king! And...
Wilma Flintstone: And what, Fred?
Fred Flintstone: And you have every right to know, my queen. I gave it to Barney.
Wilma Flintstone: You what?
Fred Flintstone: I know I should've consulted you, but Barney Rubble's my neighbor, my lodge brother and my best friend since the first time I went through the fifth grade!
Wilma Flintstone: Fred Flintstone!
Fred Flintstone: Wilma, without that money, they wouldn't be allowed to adopt a baby. So go ahead, yell, scream, let the fur fly. Give the neighbors something to talk about!
Wilma Flintstone: What you have just done for the Rubbles... Is the sweetest, most generous thing I ever heard. And I adore you for it. Mmm.
Fred Flintstone: I also bought a new bowling ball.

View Quote Woman: Wait! Come on, honey!
Driver: Watch your step.
Woman: Sit down.
Driver: All right, all together, folks.
Wilma Flintstone: Betty, sit down and relax.
Betty Rubble: Oh, I can't, Wilma. It just hit me. From now on, I'll be spending 24 hours a day attending to the every need of a helpless little boy. Then again, maybe it won't be such a big adjustment after all.
Wilma Flintstone: Fred! And promise you won't say anything like you did when you saw my sister's baby.
Fred Flintstone: The kid had a tail. Was I supposed to pretend I didn't notice?
Mrs. Pyrite: Hello, Mommy and Daddy! I have someone who wants to meet you!
Barney Rubble: Well, it's not exactly what we pictured, but... We'll love him like he was our own.
Mrs. Pyrite: No, no, no. This little fellow belongs to the Hendersons. So glad you'll be nursing.
Wilma Flintstone: Congratulations.
Mrs. Pyrite: Mr. and Mrs. Rubble, this is your little boy.
Betty Rubble: Barney, isn't he precious?
Fred Flintstone: Precious? They'd have been better off with the monkey.
Wilma Flintstone: Fred!
Betty Rubble: Does he have a name?
Mrs. Pyrite: Bamm-Bamm.
Barney Rubble: Is that short for somethin'?
Mrs. Pyrite: Bamm-Bamm-Bamm. [about Bamm-Bamm] You're going to have to take it slowly with this one. He doesn't speak yet and is a little skittish around humans, but then again, I would be too if I'd been raised by wild mastodons. [laughs]
Barney and Betty: Mastodons?!
Mrs. Pyrite: Let's not nit-pick, a mammal's a mammal.
Barney Rubble: Well, sounds to me like all he needs is a little lovin'.
Betty Rubble: Ohh.
Barney Rubble: Come here, little guy. Aah! He growled.
Betty Rubble: It's cute.
Barney Rubble: It's okay, little guy. I'm your da-da.
Bamm-Bamm: Bamm-Bamm!
Betty Rubble: Oh! Barney!
Wilma Flintstone: Oh, Betty!
Barney Rubble: Bamm-Bamm! No! Bamm-Bamm! Bamm-Bamm, wait!
Singer: Stalactite, stalagmite
Hold your baby very tight
Betty Rubble: Come back!
Barney Rubble: Come here, little guy!
Bamm-Bamm: Bamm-Bamm! Bamm! Bamm-Bamm!
Barney Rubble: Ohhh!
Singer: Rock with the caveman
Bamm-Bamm: Bamm-Bamm-Bamm-Bamm-Bamm!
Singer: Roll with the caveman
Shake to the caveman
Break with the caveman
Bamm-Bamm: Oof!
Singer: Make with the caveman
Okay, give me a C-A-V-E
Barney Rubble: Whoa!
Singer: M-A-N, Caveman
Barney Rubble: Whoa! What an arm!
Betty Rubble: "And Cinderocka married the handsome prince, and... "And they lived happily ever after."

View Quote Fred Flintstone: Ohh! No.
Pearl Slaghoople: Look at him. Drunk as a skunkosaurus.
Fred Flintstone: Aaaah!
Wilma Flintstone: Mother, I can handle this.
Fred Flintstone: What's that old fossil doing here? Did the tar pits back up again?
Pearl Slaghoople: Well, somebody has to be here looking after my daughter and grandchild... While you're out carousing with a bunch of Neanderthals.
Fred Flintstone: Oh, really? Well, for your information, the lodge no longer accepts Neanderthals.
Pearl Slaghoople: He robs your nest egg to bail out that little troll next door while my daughter has to wash her clothes in the river.
Fred Flintstone: I got half a mind...
Pearl Slaghoople: Oh, don't flatter yourself.
Fred Flintstone: That's it! Where's my club, Wilma?
Pearl Slaghoople: You just try it, fatso!
Fred Flintstone: If you was a man, I'd knock you...
Wilma Flintstone: Enough! Mother! Fred! You two should be ashamed of yourselves!
Pearl Slaghoople: I've got my hands full just being ashamed of him.
Fred Flintstone: You got your hands full when you scratch your neck!
Wilma Flintstone: Stop it! Both of you! Mother, Fred is a loving husband and a good provider.
Pearl Slaghoople: Oh, really? What has he ever provided you besides shade? Oh, Wilma. You could've married Elliot Firestone, the man who invented the wheel. Instead you picked Fred Flintstone, the man who invented the excuse.
Fred Flintstone: Let me tell you something, Pearl. I'm not going to be a nobody all my life. One of these days, I'm gonna be a somebody, a real somebody! We'll live in luxury, and Wilma will have everything she deserves. When that day comes, you'll be so busy eatin' crow you'll be passing feathers for a month!
Pearl Slaghoople: Oh, you poor, poor dear. And when I think of all the sacrifices your father made for you. Lambs, oxen, your brother Jerry.
Wilma Flintstone: Well...
Pearl Slaghoople: Oh, Wilma. Do your mother a favor. Just call Elliot Firestone. Even if things don't work out, he can give you a great deal on some tires.
Wilma Flintstone: Yes, Mother.
Pearl Slaghoople: Byesie-bye.
Fred Flintstone: I'll show her. I'll show everybody.
Wilma Flintstone: I know you will, Fred.
Fred Flintstone: Call me fatso.
Wilma Flintstone: Let's get some sleep.

View Quote Man: Hey, what's the special?
Bird: This job sucks.
Joe Rockhead: What you got today?
Hoagie: Lizard and onions. Want half?
Joe Rockhead: Sure.
Barney Rubble: You know, Fred, I hear that eatin' too much red meat is bad for you.
Fred Flintstone: What a load of bunk. My father ate it every day of his life, he lived to the ripe old age of 38.
Cliff Vandercave: Your attention please. May I have your attention! I have a very important announcement to make.
Barney Rubble: You found out why the guys in pit six are losing their hair?
Cliff Vandercave: Yes! And we are currently in the process of refuting the results of that investigation. But today I am here to formally announce the creation of Slate and Company's executive placement program. Hold your questions, please. That's right, this Saturday an aptitude test will be given, granting one of you the opportunity to crawl out of the primordial ooze and be somebody. A vice president at Slate and Company, with an obscene salary and a shiny nameplate.
All: Ooh.
Cliff Vandercave: Good luck, and may the best biped win.
Fred Flintstone: An executive? This is my chance to be somebody. Be somebody.
Pebbles: Whee! Higher, Bamm-Bamm, higher! Higher! Higher! Whee!
Betty Rubble: Wilma.
Wilma Flintstone: Hmm?
Betty Rubble: How did you get rid of the ring around the collar?
Wilma Flintstone: I just started washing Fred's neck.
Betty Rubble: Hmm. You know, Wilma, if Fred scores the highest on that test, you'll be able to hire someone to do your laundry for you.
Wilma Flintstone: If Fred scores the highest on that test, I'll have to hire someone to revive me.
Betty Rubble: Oh, it's true, Fred's no Albert Einstone. But you never know, he may surprise you.
Pebbles: Whee!
Wilma Flintstone: Well, maybe. He has been studying day and night.
Pebbles: Whee!
Betty Rubble: I know! I've never seen him so excited about something you couldn't spread mayonnaise on.

View Quote Wilma Flintstone: Good morning, Mr. Vice President.
Fred Flintstone: Good morning, Mrs. Vice President. Oh, Dino! Oh, Dino, no! Hey!
Dino: Mmm!
Fred Flintstone: Atta baby!
Wilma Flintstone: Oh...
Pebbles: Good boy, Dino.
Fred Flintstone: Well, how do I look?
Pebbles: Daddy pretty.
Wilma Flintstone: It's perfect!
Mastodon: Yeah. Snazzy.
Barney Rubble: So, Fred, what am I gonna call you now? Boss? Chief?
Fred Flintstone: No, a simple "Your Highness" will do. No, Barn. I'm not gonna be one of these guys that makes it then forgets where he came from. The first thing I'm gonna do is get everyone in the quarry some vacation time. And maybe a health plan with free foot care.
Barney Rubble: Gee, Fred, I'd settle for them little packets of ketchup for the lunch room.
Fred Flintstone: I'm only one man.
Barney Rubble: Not from the back.
Fred Flintstone: Hey, hey.
Barney Rubble: Well, I guess this is it, Mr. Flintstone. Go get 'em, big guy.
Fred Flintstone: Hey, Barn.
Barney Rubble: Yeah, Fred?
Fred Flintstone: Could you spot me a couple bucks for lunch? I'm a little short.
Barney Rubble: You're right, Fred. Nothing's changed.
Cliff Vandercave: Welcome aboard, Flintstone! We're glad you're here. Nice suit! You know, Fred, any gravel brain can shovel rock down in the quarry, but up here... Do you know what we do up here?
Fred Flintstone: Me and the guys have always wondered.
Cliff Vandercave: We interface, Flintstone. We strategize, analyze, conceptualize, prioritize...
Fred Flintstone: When do we eat?
Cliff Vandercave: Fred, until this moment I wasn't sure we'd picked the right man. Now I'm certain. Fred Flintstone, you've arrived.
Fred Flintstone: This is my office?
Cliff Vandercave: That's right.
Fred Flintstone: This is my chair?
Cliff Vandercave: Mmm-hmm. Not to throw too much at you on your first day, but this big thing here is your desk.
Fred Flintstone: My desk?
Cliff Vandercave: Watch out for your fingers in the drawers.
Miss Sharon Stone: [enters Fred's office] Ahem! Am I interrupting?
Cliff Vandercave: Not at all. Fred, I'd like you to meet Miss Sharon Stone. She's going to be your secretary.
Fred Flintstone: My secretary?
Miss Sharon Stone: Personal secretary, Mr. Flintstone, that is of course, if you want me.
[Fred's tie rolls up to his chin]
Cliff Vandercave: Well, then, I the two of you could get better acquainted. [closes the doors]
Miss Sharon Stone: Mr. Flintstone, I'd like you to know that I enjoy working long hours, late nights, even weekends, so feel free to use me however you see fit. Now! Can I get you anything? Coffee?
Fred Flintstone: Sure.
Miss Sharon Stone: [seductive whisper] How would you like it?
Fred Flintstone: In a cup.
Miss Sharon Stone: Bold choice Mr. Flintstone. You'll go far in this company.
Fred Flintstone: Take a memo. Cliff, let's play golf. We can prioritize, conceptualize and, uh... Tenderize. Executively yours, Fred Fli... Ah!
Dictabird: Are there six or seven "I"s in "Fli... Ah"?
Fred Flintstone: Who said that?
Dictabird: It was I, your dictabird.
Fred Flintstone: Dicta-what?
Dictabird: Dictabird. Read my beak. "Cliff, let's play golf. "We can prioritize, conceptualize and, uh, tenderize."
Fred Flintstone: Wow. Wow!
Dictabird: Mr. Flintstone, I'd like to warn you that management positions are fraught with peril. Whenever you find yourself in a befuddled state, I urge you to avail yourself of my experience and sage advice.
Fred Flintstone: Oh, really? Listen, birdie, let's get the pecking order straight here.
Dictabird: Hmm.
Fred Flintstone: I don't need any help from you. I'm Vice President of... Of, uh...
Dictabird: Industrial procurement.
Fred Flintstone: How about that? Excuse me. Hey, guys! Guess what I am! Vice President of Industrial Procurement!
All: [cheering]
Dictabird: Oy! Whew.

View Quote Barney Rubble: Come on, Fred, usually you're yakkin' my ear off, but today you haven't said two words. Something exciting must have happened up there.
Fred Flintstone: You don't want to know, Barn, believe me.
Barney Rubble: Sure I do, Fred. You're the first one of us to make it out of that quarry. Look at me. I'll probably be working there the rest of my life.
Fred Flintstone: No, you won't, Barn. Take my word for it.
Barney Rubble: Come take a look... It's a dish in the shower, you keep the soap in it.
Fred Flintstone: Barney, there's something we gotta talk about.
Barney Rubble: Yeah, yeah. Later, Fred.
All: Surprise! Way to go, Fred!
Fred Flintstone: Wilma, you shouldn't have.
Wilma Flintstone: Hmm? I didn't. This was all Barney and Betty's idea. Aren't we lucky to have friends like them, Fred?
Pearl Slaghoople: Ohh! There he is! There's my big, handsome son-in-law! Have you lost weight?
Fred Flintstones: Have we met?
Barney Rubble: Can I have everybody's attention, please? I've got something I'd like to say.
Hoagie: I hope it's not another poem.
Barney Rubble: Fred... Betty, Bamm-Bamm and I could not be happier, even if it was me that got that job.
All: Aww!
Barney Rubble: So we got a little something to show how proud of you we are.Congratulations, big guy!
Fred Flintstone: Barney, I can't accept this.
Barney Rubble: Sure, you can.
Fred Flintstone: No, I can't. Take it back.
Betty Rubble: We can't. We had your initials branded on it.
Barney Rubble: It's yours, Fred.
Fred Flintstone: No, it's not!
Wilma Flintstone: Fred, what's wrong with you? It's a lovely gift. He's thrilled to receive it. Aren't you, Fred?
Fred Flintstone: No!
Betty Rubble: Don't you like the color?
Fred Flintstone: It's not the briefcase, it's not the color. I just can't take anything from you.
Barney Rubble: But, Fred...
Pearl Slaghoople: Take a hike, shorty. My Freddie doesn't want that tacky thing.
Barney Rubble: How come, Fred?
Fred Flintstone: Because you can't afford it, Barn.
Barney Rubble: Sure I can, pal.
Fred Flintstone: Not anymore. You're fired.
Bird: Fired?
Pearl Slaghoople: Well! Let's not let a little thing like this spoil the party! Conga line!
Hoagie: Conga! Conga!
Barney Rubble: Don't worry about me, Fred. I've been working in that quarry since it was eight feet deep.
Fred Flintstone: Atta boy!
Barney Rubble: There could be a whole new world opening up for me. Maybe I'll take in that franchise show this weekend.
Fred Flintstone: That's the spirit.
Barney Rubble: Hey, Fred, there's just one thing I gotta know. After all these years, how come they're canning me?
Fred Flintstone: Barn, you're a wonderful father, a loving husband, a hard worker, and one heck of a little bowler. But, Barn, none of that counts on an aptitude test. You got the lowest score, pal.
Barney Rubble: The lowest score?

View Quote Betty Rubble: Wilma, that is beautiful!
Wilma Flintstone: Well, I have always wanted...
Pebbles: You can't catch me!
Wilma Flintstone: A Halstone original.
Betty Rubble: Mmm.
Wilma Flintstone: Ohh!
Betty Rubble: Now, Wilma, don't be silly! Your husband's a big executive. You can afford it.
Betty and Wilma: Charge it!
Betty Rubble: Bamm-Bamm! Ohh! Bamm-Bamm! No!
Bamm-Bamm: Bamm-Bamm! Bamm-Bamm!

View Quote Store Manager: Excuse me. Mrs. Rubble?
Betty Rubble: Yes.
Store Manager: There seems to be a slight problem with your credit carol.
Betty Rubble: Really? And what would that be?
Store Manager: It's no damn good!
Betty Rubble: I have never been so embarrassed in my entire life.
Wilma Flintstone: Go and play, children.
Betty Rubble: Wilma, I promise you I'll pay you back. I just don't know when.
Wilma Flintstone: Oh, now, Betty. It can't be as bad as all that.
Betty Rubble: But it is. Barney's still out of work, we've nearly spent all of our savings. And, Wilma, what if the adoption agency finds out? I don't want to lose my baby.
Wilma Flintstone: I swear, Betty, Fred and I would never let that happen.
Betty Rubble: Oh, Wilma.
Wilma Flintstone: Oh, Betty.
Man: Pterodactyl alert!
Pebbles: Mommy, help!
Bird: Ow, yuck! Ew!

View Quote Fred Flintstone: And in conclusion, Mr. Slate, I feel a paid vacation for everyone in the quarry would raise morale and increase productivity, um, um... A whole bunch! Sincerely yours, Frederick J. Flintstone.
Dictabird: Shall I make that "Flagstone," so he'll know who it's from?
Miss Sharon Stone: My, don't we look handsome today?
Fred and Dictabird: Thank you.
Miss Sharon Stone: Here are today's batch of requisitions. All marked and ready for your signature.
Fred Flintstone: Okay. You know Miss Stone, I've been signing stacks of these things for weeks now, and I hate to pry, but, what are they?
Miss Sharon Stone: Oh, just tiny little forms so that we can pay the contractors working on the modernization.
Fred Flintstone: You know, we remodeled our kitchen a couple of years ago, and let me tell you, contractors can be real pirates. I'm going to read these over.
Miss Sharon Stone: [covers them, slides onto his desk] No! You're much too busy for that, Mr. Flintstone. Besides, reading is my job. You wouldn't want to put poor little old me out of work now, would you?
[Wilma and Pebbles walk in the room]
Fred Flintstone: No.
[Miss Stone turns over on her back and seductively rubs his cheek. They both giggle]
Dictabird: Um, eh, your wife. Your, your wife.
Fred Flintstone: My wife? Wilma? [notices Wilma] Wilma! What a surprise!
Wilma Flintstone: So it would seem.
Fred Flintstone: Miss Stone, I'd like you to meet my wife Mrs. Flagstone... And our daughter, um... Um, um, um... Isn't she beautiful? My family.
Wilma Flintstone: I've heard so much about you. Well, I wish that I could say the same.
Fred Flintstone: That'll be all, Miss Stone. I'll sign those documents and place them on your desk.
Miss Sharon Stone: Whatever you want.
Wilma Flintstone: Your secretary is very attractive.
Fred Flintstone: Really? I hadn't noticed. Did I mention she chisels 18 words a minute?
Wilma Flintstone: Hmm.
Fred Flintstone: Hey, Wilma, did ya ever see one of these? My wife is the most beautiful gal in Bedrock.
Dictabird: "My wife is the most beautiful gal in Bedrock."
Wilma Flintstone: Nice try, Fred.
Dictabird: "Nice try, Fred."
Wilma Flintstone: Fred! I've come to talk about the Rubbles' troubles.
Fred Flintstone: Hasn't Barney found a job yet?
Wilma Flintstone: It's gotten so bad, they've had to rent out their house just to make ends meet.
Fred Flintstone: Really. Where are they gonna live?

View Quote Betty Rubble: So glad you're over your cold. Thank you.
Wilma Flintstone: Isn't this nice, Betty? The Flintstones and the Rubbles, all under one roof.
Betty Rubble: Yes, but this is such an imposition. Are you sure it's okay with Fred?
Wilma Flintstone: Oh, absolutely. As a matter of fact, he thinks it was his idea.
Barney Rubble: Hey, Freddie, a couple of cool ones.
Fred Flintstone: Oh, yeah. How about it, Barn? Flintstones and Rubbles under one roof.
Barney Rubble: But it's only temporary.
Fred Flintstone: It'd better be. It'd better be!
Barney Rubble: Yeah!
Fred Flintstone: Ah, Barn, I admire ya. You've lost your job, your dignity, but not your sense of humor.
Barney Rubble: Hey, cut it out, Fred!
Fred Flintstone: Hey, Barn, you like your steak rare?
Barney Rubble: Yeah.
Fred Flintstone: That one's yours.
Barney Rubble: Hey, hey, stop! Come here, you purple rodent! Don't forget to wash that off before you eat it! Come here! Give me that! Help! Somebody!

View Quote Fred Flintstone: A bonus?
Cliff Vandercave: That's right, Fred! You deserve it.
Fred Flintstone: For what?
Cliff Vandercave: Don't be modest, you go-getter, you! And Fred, let me let you in on a little secret. If you really want to become a top executive at this company, you've got to start living like one.
Fred Flintstone: [laughing]
The BC-52's: Yabba-dabba-doo!
Flintstones
Meet the Flintstones
They're the modern
Stone Age family
From the town of Bedrock
They're a page right out of history
Barney Rubble: Good afternoon, madam.
Woman at Chevrox: Full serve, please.
The BC-52's: Let's ride
With the family down the street
Through the courtesy of Fred's two feet
When you're with the Flintstones
Have a yabba-dabba-doo time
A dabba-doo time
Wilma Flintstone: Oh, dear!
The BC-52's: We'll have a gay old time
Fred Flintstone: Good boy.
Aerobics Instructor: Good, Wilma! Use your arms. Perfect. That's four.
Wilma Flintstone: Betty! Towel.
Aerobics Instructor: Keep going. Go eight. Strong, tight. Go nine.
The BC-52's: A yabba-dabba-doo time

View Quote Announcer: Ladies and gentlemen, the B.C.-52's!
The BC-52's: Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah
Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, hey
Twitch!
Well, I know a place where the hipsters go
Called Bedrock
Twitch, twitch
'Cause they're itching for it down in prehistoric
Bedrock
Twitch, twitch
It's a funky town so
I'll see you down
It's a funky town called Bedrock, yeah
Oh, the Stone Age crowd is twitching proud
In Bedrock
Twitch, twitch
They do the twitch
Twitch, twitch, come on
Twitch, twitch
Twitch, twitch
Twitch, twitch
Twitch, twitch
Do it, come on, baby
Do it, do it, do it
Do the twitch like you got an itch, itch
Yeah, yeah, yeah
Itch, itch, itch, itch
Yeah, yeah, yeah
Twitch!
Announcer: Thank you, Bedrock! Thanks, everybody. And remember, don't drink and pedal. Good night!
Fred Flintstone: How 'bout a spin, Betty?
Betty Rubble: No, thank you, Fred. I'll wait till Barney gets here. He started some new job today. I'm not sure what time he gets done.
Fred Flintstone: While we're waiting, how about another carafe of the bubbly? Garcon! Whoops.
Waiter: Don't worry, Mr. Flintstone. I'll have that taken care of right away. Table seven, sonny.
Betty Rubble: Barney!
Fred Flintstone: Barney! Hey, nice skins! Sit down, take a load off!
Barney Rubble: I can't, Fred. I'm working here.
Fred Flintstone: You're a busboy?
Betty Rubble: It's honest work.
Barney Rubble: Yeah, I don't have to fight Dino for my supper. Now, if you'll excuse me, I'll get you a fresh tablecloth, sir.
Fred Flintstone: See, Wilma, you were worried he'd never find a job and we'd be stuck with him forever. Ow!
[Barney notices a news broadcast on TV]
All: Flintstone! Flintstone! We want Flintstone!
Susan Rock: The demonstration continues to get uglier at Slate and Company following the unexpected layoff of virtually the entire labor force by V.P. Fred Flintstone. For the Cave News Network, this is Susan Rock.
Barney Rubble: Fred, did you hear what happened to everyone at the quarry today?
Fred Flintstone: Yup. A few hours ago, I sent them all off on a nice, long vacation.
Barney Rubble: You mean, a permanent vacation. [turns to Wilma and Betty, points to him] He fired them!
[Betty gasps]
Wilma Flintstone: Fred! How could you?
Fred Flintstone: I didn't do that.
Barney Rubble: You did too! It's all over the TV!
Wilma Flintstone: Fred!
Fred Flintstone: Who are you going to believe, me or some busboy?
Betty Rubble: That busboy is your best friend!
Fred Flintstone: Best friend? I lost my best friend the day I became an executive! He's just jealous of my hard-earned success.
Barney Rubble: Hard-earned? Tell me something, Mr. Vice President, what's a graduated inventory plan, huh? How about supply and demand? Hey, Fred! What's two and two?
Fred Flintstone: I didn't come here to talk business. I'm out with my wife. [holds up a dirty spoon] Now, get me a clean spoon.
Barney Rubble: [angrily slams down tablecloth] That does it! The only reason you got that job is 'cause I switched tests with you.
Betty Rubble: Oh, Barney.
Fred Flintstone: Oh-ho-ho, that's rich! What good would it do me to switch tests with the guy that got the lowest score?
Barney Rubble: Think about it, Fred.
Betty Rubble: Oh, finally it all makes sense.
Wilma Flintstone: You don't believe this, do you?
Betty Rubble: Are you calling my husband a liar?
Wilma Flintstone: This has gone far enough. After everything that we've done for you. We took you into our home.
Betty Rubble: Oh, yeah? So you could show off every chance you got! You used to be such nice people, but now... You're just a couple of rich snobs! Hmm!
Fred Flintstone: Better than being a couple of petty ingrates.
Betty Rubble: Come on, Barney. We are moving out, tonight!
Barney Rubble: Hang on, Betty. I forgot to punch out.
[Barney punches Fred in the face, causing him to faint]

View Quote Barney Rubble: Eh, put it up top.
Wilma Flintstone: Betty, please. We can work it out. We're all civilized people here.
Betty Rubble: It's too late, Wilma.
Wilma Flintstone: Come on, we all said things that we didn't mean.
Fred Flintstone: Speak for yourself.
Barney Rubble: Come on, Betty. Time to hit the road.
Wilma Flintstone: Fred! Aren't you even the least bit sorry?
Fred Flintstone: Sure, I'm sorry. I'm sorry I ever met the little moocher.
Wilma Flintstone: Oh, Betty.
Betty Rubble: Good-bye, Wilma.
Wilma Flintstone: Oh. They're gone. I cannot believe you just sat there and let them walk out of our lives.
Fred Flintstone: At least I can walk around the house in my underwear again.
Wilma Flintstone: That's more important than 20 years of friendship?
Fred Flintstone: It is on a hot day. They were holding us back, Wilma. We'll make new friends. There's 4,000 other people in this world! Who needs the Rubbles?
Wilma Flintstone: I do. But I'll tell you what I don't need. I don't need this necklace. You know, I don't need this lamp. And I don't need this television set.
Fred Flintstone: Not the TV!
Wilma Flintstone: I don't need this. I don't need this. I don't think I'll be needing any of this bone china. Because I don't have any friends to invite to dinner. I don't think I'll be using any of these cups or saucers.
Fred Flintstone: You're gonna regret this, Wilma. It's gonna take you hours to clean up this mess. All right, Wilma. Enough of this charade. Come back now, and I'll forgive ya. Oh, you're bluff in', Wilma Slaghoople. You're not going to your mother's. Once around the block, you'll realize the folly of your ways and you'll come crawling back. Please.

View Quote Pearl Slaghoople: Here comes the pterodactyl.
Pebbles Mmm-mmm-mmm.
Wilma Flintstone: It's no use, Mother. She misses Fred. I hope it's not that pesky Avrok lady again. Oh! Betty!
Betty Rubble: Oh.
Pebbles: Bamm-Bamm!
Wilma Flintstone: I have missed you so much.
Betty Rubble: I don't care what Barney said. I couldn't let you go through this alone. Have you heard from Fred?
Wilma Flintstone: No.
Pearl Slaghoople: I spoke to a lawyer. If he's missing seven years, you can remarry.
Wilma Flintstone: Mother! Well, wherever Fred is, I hope he knows I still love him. Oh.
Police Radio: Calling all Bedrock units, all Bedrock units.
Bedrock's Most Wanted Host: Tonight, in a special edition of Bedrock's Most Wanted, we bring you the story that's rocked our city, "The Case of the Embezzling Executive."
Miss Stone Look-A-Like: Mr. Flintstone, what are you doing?
Fred Look-A-Like: I'm an executive. I'm embezzling.
Miss Stone Look-A-Like: I'm shocked!
Pearl Slaghoople: How could you ever marry that man?
Wilma Flintstone: Mother! That man is not my husband.
Betty Rubble: That's right. He plays Dr. Gravelman on The Young And The Thumbless.
Wilma Flintstone: Fred might be a lot of things but a thief is not one of them.
Pearl Slaghoople: Can he prove it?
Fred Look-A-Like: Who cares? Yabba-dabba-dabba!
Dictabird Look-A-Like: Yabba-dabba-dabba!
Bedrock's Most Wanted Host: This menace remains at large... We ask the public's help in apprehending...
Wilma Flintstone: Maybe I can.

View Quote Miss Sharon Stone: Just think. This time tomorrow, we'll be on a pterodactyl winging our... Oh, Cliff.
Cliff Vandercave: Hmm?
Miss Sharon Stone: How come there's only one ticket to Rocapulco?
Cliff Vandercave: For your protection, darling. I thought I would go on a "business trip," while you stay here to keep up appearances. Then, when we're sure it's safe, I'll send for you.
Miss Sharon Stone: Forgive me, Cliff. Looks like you've thought of everything.
Wilma Flintstone: Psst. Excuse me! Hello.
Dictabird: No, Mumsie, I don't want to go to school. The other boys make fun of me.
Wilma Flintstone: Wake up!
Dictabird: Oh, Mrs. Flintstone. To what do I owe the honor of this break-in?
Wilma Flintstone: I need your help, Mr. Bird. You hear everything that goes on in this office.
Dictabird: Hmm-hmm.
Wilma Flintstone: You are the only one who can help clear my husband.
Dictabird: My, my. What a delicious irony. Thank you for sharing it with me. Now, let me share something with you.
Betty Rubble: Oh, now, Wilma, calm down. Maybe I can reason with him.
Dictabird: Ow!
Cliff Vandercave: There. All set. You know, my only regret is I won't be around when that shoddy new equipment blows up in their big, dumb faces. Oh, well, I'll just have to console myself with all that money. Hey, who's that?
Miss Sharon Stone: That's Flintstone's wife.
Cliff Vandercave: What would she want with a stinky old dict... Son of a brachiosaurus!
Miss Sharon Stone: Well, Cliff. I guess you haven't thought of everything.
Cliff Vandercave: Oh, this is far from over.

View Quote Hoagie: String him up!
Fred Flintstone: You can't do this. I was framed!
Grizzled Man: In a minute you're going to be boxed.
All: [cheering]
Barney Rubble: Anybody want a snow cone?
Fred Flintstone: Barney!
Barney Rubble: Fred! What are you doing here?
Fred Flintstone: I'm getting lynched!
Barney Rubble: Oh. I got cherry, lime, rocky road.
Grizzled Man: Wait a minute. Do you know this guy?
Barney Rubble: Know him? He used to be my best friend. In a way, if it wasn't for me, this whole mess probably wouldn't have happened.
Grizzled Man: Thanks for filling us in. We could've made a very big mistake here. Hang both of 'em.
Barney Rubble: What? Gee, take it easy. They make you pay for your own uniforms.
Fred Flintstone: Barney, I thought you came to save me.
Barney Rubble: Save you? I saw a crowd, I figured I'd sell a few snow cones.
Fred Flintstone: You mean you haven't forgiven me yet?
Barney Rubble: Nope. And frankly, I don't think this is going to help.
Roxanne: I took a cherry.
Barney Rubble: I can't break a 20.
Fred Flintstone: Hey, hey, hey! Wait a minute! Look, Barn, I know you're still a little mad at me. But I want you to know, if I had to have someone hanging next to me, I'm glad it's you.
Barney Rubble: I guess switchin' them tests didn't turn out much like I planned, huh, Fred?
Accuser: Hey, got any lemon?
Barney Rubble: Check in the back. Gee, why can't business be this good every day? The story of my life. I'm a loser.
Fred Flintstone: No, you're not.
Barney Rubble: This makes me a winner?
Fred Flintstone: No, but you're the best friend a guy ever had and that makes you a winner in my book, pal. Me... I'm just a big jerk.
Barney Rubble: Ah, everybody loves you, Fred. Except for this lynch mob.
Fred Flintstone: Ah, Barn.
Barney Rubble: Ah, Fred.
Hoagie: Come on, come on. You'll have plenty of time to bond in the afterlife.
All: [cheering]
Betty Rubble: Wilma, look!
Man: Watch out for that tree!
Wilma Flintstone: Now wait, everybody. Fred is innocent.
Betty Rubble: Barney, do you have to do everything Fred does?
Wilma Flintstone: Everybody, listen to him.
Dictabird: First things first. I demand an apology.
Barney Rubble: I'm sorry!
Dictabird: Not you, him.
Fred Flintstone: Me? Apologize to a bird? Not Fred Flintstone!
Dictabird: I had hoped we might be colleagues but instead, you've treated me as if I were an ordinary piece of office furniture. I may eat bugs, but I have feelings, Mr. Flintstone. And you've hurt them.
All: Aww.
Fred Flintstone: Uh, well, look, I know I could've been a little more sensitive. Especially when you were molting.
Wilma Flintstone: Oh.
Fred Flintstone: So, I'm... Sorry.
Dictabird: I don't think they heard you in the back.
Fred Flintstone: I'm sorry.
Dictabird: Pardon?
Fred Flintstone: I'm sorry, I'm sorry!
Dictabird: Oh. Now, then, gather 'round, everyone. I'll tell you the tale of an unsophisticated man caught up in a treacherous web of power, deceit and lust.
Grizzled Man: Ooh, yeah.

View Quote Wilma Flintstone: Why is the door open?
Fred Flintstone: What?
Wilma Flintstone: Betty, the door is open!
Betty Rubble: Wilma, something's wrong!
Wilma Flintstone: Pebbles!
Betty Rubble: Bamm-Bamm!
Fred Flintstone: What kind of madman would do something like this? That's a poor poochie. That's a baby. That's a baby.
Wilma Flintstone: Pebbles and Bamm-Bamm are gone!
Betty Rubble: They left this.
Barney Rubble: It's a note.
Fred Flintstone: If you want to see your kids again, bring the Dictabird to the quarry at dawn. No police.
Dictabird: [gasps]

View Quote Dictabird: And then, Cliff said, "True. But I've graciously decided to give you all the credit, "since it's your name on all the requisition forms."
Miss Sharon Stone: Mr. Flintstone, I may not be in on Monday.
Fred Flintstone: Don't worry, Miss Stone. I'll tell 'em what you did. They'll let you off easy.
Miss Sharon Stone: I've been a very bad girl. But you have to admit, I was very, very good at it.
Barney Rubble: Come on, do it for Mommy. Who am I?
Bamm-Bamm: Bamm-Bamm!
Betty Rubble: Oh.
Wilma Flintstone: Thank goodness, you're all right.
Fred Flintstone: Well, I'm not going to jail, but it won't be easy getting a new job. What kind of reference is Mr. Slate gonna give me after I destroyed his quarry?
Betty Rubble: None of this was your fault. Mr. Slate will understand.
Mr. Slate: Flintstone!
Fred Flintstone: Sure, now he gets my name right.
Mr. Slate: How did this happen?
Fred Flintstone: Mr. Slate, it all started when the Rubbles here wanted to adopt a baby.
Mr. Slate: Not that! How did this happen to Cliff?
Fred Flintstone: Well, you see, Mr. Slate, the machinery went haywire and the rocks got all crushed up and that got mixed in with water and that came all down the hill. Mr. Slate, I'm sorry!
Mr. Slate: Sorry? I love this stuff! I'm gonna name it after my daughter Concretia. Flintstone, you're a genius!
Fred Flintstone: Me? Really? Why?
Mr. Slate: Don't you see? Thanks to concrete, man can now shape his own destiny. The Stone Age is over!
Wilma Flintstone: Ahh.
Mr. Slate: First thing, I want you to hire back all the men, Flintstone. We're going into production immediately.
Fred Flintstone: We?
Mr. Slate: That's right. You are hereby promoted to President of the entire concrete division.
Fred Flintstone: Yabba... That's a real nice offer, Mr. Slate, but unfortunately, I'm gonna have to turn you down.
Barney Rubble: Don't listen to him, Mr. Slate. Fred, it's a great job! This time, you deserve it.
Fred Flintstone: Barney, all my life I wanted to be a somebody. And when I finally did, I turned into somebody I didn't like.
Mr. Slate: Good grief, man, have you lost your mind? This could make you rich beyond your wildest dreams.
Fred Flintstone: I was always the richest man in the world. I just never knew it. So, if it's okay with you, Mr. Slate, all I want is my old job back and my old life.
Barney Rubble: Fred.
Fred Flintstone: And two weeks paid vacation for all the men in the quarry, an annual cost of livin' increase and those little packets of ketchup in the lunchroom.
Mr. Slate: Done!
Fred Flintstone: Thanks, boss. See you at the company picnic.
Mr. Slate: There goes the best executive I ever had.
Wilma Flintstone: Fred, I'm so proud of you.
Betty Rubble: And I'm proud of you, Barney.
Fred Flintstone: I'm starving!
Barney Rubble: Me too!
Fred Flintstone: What do you say we get some breakfast. Snake and eggs for everybody. My treat.
Barney Rubble: Great.
Fred Flintstone: Barney...
Barney Rubble: Yeah, Fred?
Fred Flintstone: Spot me a couple bucks? I'm a little short.
Barney Rubble: Not this time!
Fred Flintstone: What?
The BC-52's: [singing] Flintstones
Meet the Flintstones
They're a modern
Stone Age family
From the town of Bedrock
They're a page right out of history
Someday maybe
Fred will win the fight
Then that cat will stay out for the night
When you're with the Flintstones
Have a yabba-dabba-doo time
A dabba-doo time
We'll have a gay old time
Fred Flintstone: Wilma!
The BC-52's: [singing] We'll have a gay old time
Fred Flintstone: Wilma!