Hoagie quotes from The Flintstones (1994)

View Quote Man: Yeah!
Barney Rubble: Okay, Brother Flintstone, we need a strike to win. Can you do it?
Fred Flintstone: Is the Earth flat?
Barney Rubble: Come on, Freddie!
Man: Come on, hit it!
Barney Rubble: Come on, twinkle toes.
All: Fred!
Hoagie: Waka-waka-woo!
All: Waka-waka-woo!
Hoagie: Wooga-wooga-wee!
All: Wooga-wooga-wee! Piki-piki-piki! Poki-poki-poki!! Ahhhhhhhh-oooh!
Barney Rubble: Lava juice! Hey, can I have everybody's attention, please? I would like to propose a toast to not only a great bowler, but a great human being. And no offense to you guys. "Since I was just a lad often, I've had the very bestest friend. "He may be big, he may be loud, "so you'll never lose him in a crowd. "But for my friend the special part... "Is what's behind his ribs... His heart." "I owe my son to him, and now... "I stand before my peers and vow... "I'll pay him back, someday, somehow." The end.
Fred Flintstone: That was beautiful, Barn.
Barney Rubble: I meant every word of it, Fred.
Fred Flintstone: Care to join me in a cold one?
Barney Rubble: Love to.
Hoagie: It doesn't get any better than this.

View Quote Man: Hey, what's the special?
Bird: This job sucks.
Joe Rockhead: What you got today?
Hoagie: Lizard and onions. Want half?
Joe Rockhead: Sure.
Barney Rubble: You know, Fred, I hear that eatin' too much red meat is bad for you.
Fred Flintstone: What a load of bunk. My father ate it every day of his life, he lived to the ripe old age of 38.
Cliff Vandercave: Your attention please. May I have your attention! I have a very important announcement to make.
Barney Rubble: You found out why the guys in pit six are losing their hair?
Cliff Vandercave: Yes! And we are currently in the process of refuting the results of that investigation. But today I am here to formally announce the creation of Slate and Company's executive placement program. Hold your questions, please. That's right, this Saturday an aptitude test will be given, granting one of you the opportunity to crawl out of the primordial ooze and be somebody. A vice president at Slate and Company, with an obscene salary and a shiny nameplate.
All: Ooh.
Cliff Vandercave: Good luck, and may the best biped win.
Fred Flintstone: An executive? This is my chance to be somebody. Be somebody.
Pebbles: Whee! Higher, Bamm-Bamm, higher! Higher! Higher! Whee!
Betty Rubble: Wilma.
Wilma Flintstone: Hmm?
Betty Rubble: How did you get rid of the ring around the collar?
Wilma Flintstone: I just started washing Fred's neck.
Betty Rubble: Hmm. You know, Wilma, if Fred scores the highest on that test, you'll be able to hire someone to do your laundry for you.
Wilma Flintstone: If Fred scores the highest on that test, I'll have to hire someone to revive me.
Betty Rubble: Oh, it's true, Fred's no Albert Einstone. But you never know, he may surprise you.
Pebbles: Whee!
Wilma Flintstone: Well, maybe. He has been studying day and night.
Pebbles: Whee!
Betty Rubble: I know! I've never seen him so excited about something you couldn't spread mayonnaise on.

View Quote Barney Rubble: Come on, Fred, usually you're yakkin' my ear off, but today you haven't said two words. Something exciting must have happened up there.
Fred Flintstone: You don't want to know, Barn, believe me.
Barney Rubble: Sure I do, Fred. You're the first one of us to make it out of that quarry. Look at me. I'll probably be working there the rest of my life.
Fred Flintstone: No, you won't, Barn. Take my word for it.
Barney Rubble: Come take a look... It's a dish in the shower, you keep the soap in it.
Fred Flintstone: Barney, there's something we gotta talk about.
Barney Rubble: Yeah, yeah. Later, Fred.
All: Surprise! Way to go, Fred!
Fred Flintstone: Wilma, you shouldn't have.
Wilma Flintstone: Hmm? I didn't. This was all Barney and Betty's idea. Aren't we lucky to have friends like them, Fred?
Pearl Slaghoople: Ohh! There he is! There's my big, handsome son-in-law! Have you lost weight?
Fred Flintstones: Have we met?
Barney Rubble: Can I have everybody's attention, please? I've got something I'd like to say.
Hoagie: I hope it's not another poem.
Barney Rubble: Fred... Betty, Bamm-Bamm and I could not be happier, even if it was me that got that job.
All: Aww!
Barney Rubble: So we got a little something to show how proud of you we are.Congratulations, big guy!
Fred Flintstone: Barney, I can't accept this.
Barney Rubble: Sure, you can.
Fred Flintstone: No, I can't. Take it back.
Betty Rubble: We can't. We had your initials branded on it.
Barney Rubble: It's yours, Fred.
Fred Flintstone: No, it's not!
Wilma Flintstone: Fred, what's wrong with you? It's a lovely gift. He's thrilled to receive it. Aren't you, Fred?
Fred Flintstone: No!
Betty Rubble: Don't you like the color?
Fred Flintstone: It's not the briefcase, it's not the color. I just can't take anything from you.
Barney Rubble: But, Fred...
Pearl Slaghoople: Take a hike, shorty. My Freddie doesn't want that tacky thing.
Barney Rubble: How come, Fred?
Fred Flintstone: Because you can't afford it, Barn.
Barney Rubble: Sure I can, pal.
Fred Flintstone: Not anymore. You're fired.
Bird: Fired?
Pearl Slaghoople: Well! Let's not let a little thing like this spoil the party! Conga line!
Hoagie: Conga! Conga!
Barney Rubble: Don't worry about me, Fred. I've been working in that quarry since it was eight feet deep.
Fred Flintstone: Atta boy!
Barney Rubble: There could be a whole new world opening up for me. Maybe I'll take in that franchise show this weekend.
Fred Flintstone: That's the spirit.
Barney Rubble: Hey, Fred, there's just one thing I gotta know. After all these years, how come they're canning me?
Fred Flintstone: Barn, you're a wonderful father, a loving husband, a hard worker, and one heck of a little bowler. But, Barn, none of that counts on an aptitude test. You got the lowest score, pal.
Barney Rubble: The lowest score?

View Quote Hoagie: There he is! You're a traitor, Flintstone!
Fred Flintstone: Listen to me. I'm your friend.
Hoagie: You're no friend of ours! You're a rotten bowler too!
Miss Sharon Stone: Good morning, Mr. Flint...
Fred Flintstone: They made a fool of me.
Dictabird: Look what they had to work with.
Cliff Vandercave: Flintstone, heard you were down in the file room. Find anything interesting?
Fred Flintstone: Yeah! I'm on to your little scam. Billing phony companies and keeping the money for yourself. I'm going to Mr. Slate.
Cliff Vandercave: Good idea. Turning yourself in might buy you a little leniency.
Fred Flintstone: Me? This entire scheme was your idea.
Cliff Vandercave: True. But I've graciously decided to give you all the credit, since it's your name on the requisitions.
Fred Flintstone: I never touched any of that money!
Cliff Vandercave: Hmm. Fred, please. Remodeling your house, furs, jewelry, a fully-equipped Le Sabertooth. Tsk, tsk, tsk. You should have been more discreet.
Fred Flintstone: I'm innocent!
Cliff Vandercave: Oh, boo-hoo-hoo. Miss Stone, call security. Tell them we've uncovered an embezzler.
[Cliff is suing Fred for embezzlement]
Fred Flintstone: [grabs her hand] Miss Stone, you'll back me up, won't ya?
Miss Sharon Stone: You better run while you still have a chance.
Fred Flintstone: You'll never get away with this.
Cliff Vandercave: I already have.
Dictabird: [sighs]

View Quote Hoagie: String him up!
Fred Flintstone: You can't do this. I was framed!
Grizzled Man: In a minute you're going to be boxed.
All: [cheering]
Barney Rubble: Anybody want a snow cone?
Fred Flintstone: Barney!
Barney Rubble: Fred! What are you doing here?
Fred Flintstone: I'm getting lynched!
Barney Rubble: Oh. I got cherry, lime, rocky road.
Grizzled Man: Wait a minute. Do you know this guy?
Barney Rubble: Know him? He used to be my best friend. In a way, if it wasn't for me, this whole mess probably wouldn't have happened.
Grizzled Man: Thanks for filling us in. We could've made a very big mistake here. Hang both of 'em.
Barney Rubble: What? Gee, take it easy. They make you pay for your own uniforms.
Fred Flintstone: Barney, I thought you came to save me.
Barney Rubble: Save you? I saw a crowd, I figured I'd sell a few snow cones.
Fred Flintstone: You mean you haven't forgiven me yet?
Barney Rubble: Nope. And frankly, I don't think this is going to help.
Roxanne: I took a cherry.
Barney Rubble: I can't break a 20.
Fred Flintstone: Hey, hey, hey! Wait a minute! Look, Barn, I know you're still a little mad at me. But I want you to know, if I had to have someone hanging next to me, I'm glad it's you.
Barney Rubble: I guess switchin' them tests didn't turn out much like I planned, huh, Fred?
Accuser: Hey, got any lemon?
Barney Rubble: Check in the back. Gee, why can't business be this good every day? The story of my life. I'm a loser.
Fred Flintstone: No, you're not.
Barney Rubble: This makes me a winner?
Fred Flintstone: No, but you're the best friend a guy ever had and that makes you a winner in my book, pal. Me... I'm just a big jerk.
Barney Rubble: Ah, everybody loves you, Fred. Except for this lynch mob.
Fred Flintstone: Ah, Barn.
Barney Rubble: Ah, Fred.
Hoagie: Come on, come on. You'll have plenty of time to bond in the afterlife.
All: [cheering]
Betty Rubble: Wilma, look!
Man: Watch out for that tree!
Wilma Flintstone: Now wait, everybody. Fred is innocent.
Betty Rubble: Barney, do you have to do everything Fred does?
Wilma Flintstone: Everybody, listen to him.
Dictabird: First things first. I demand an apology.
Barney Rubble: I'm sorry!
Dictabird: Not you, him.
Fred Flintstone: Me? Apologize to a bird? Not Fred Flintstone!
Dictabird: I had hoped we might be colleagues but instead, you've treated me as if I were an ordinary piece of office furniture. I may eat bugs, but I have feelings, Mr. Flintstone. And you've hurt them.
All: Aww.
Fred Flintstone: Uh, well, look, I know I could've been a little more sensitive. Especially when you were molting.
Wilma Flintstone: Oh.
Fred Flintstone: So, I'm... Sorry.
Dictabird: I don't think they heard you in the back.
Fred Flintstone: I'm sorry.
Dictabird: Pardon?
Fred Flintstone: I'm sorry, I'm sorry!
Dictabird: Oh. Now, then, gather 'round, everyone. I'll tell you the tale of an unsophisticated man caught up in a treacherous web of power, deceit and lust.
Grizzled Man: Ooh, yeah.