There's a machine-gun nest near hill twenty-eight. I want it cleaned out.
All right. I'll tell the janitor.
Rufus T. Firefly
Groucho Marx · 40 quotes
Chicolini
Chico Marx · 17 quotes
Mrs. Teasdale
Margaret Dumont · 9 quotes
Trentino
Louis Calhern · 8 quotes
Bob Roland
Zeppo Marx · 3 quotes
Prosecutor
Charles Middleton · 3 quotes
Most scenes together: Rufus T. Firefly & Chicolini (11), Rufus T. Firefly & Mrs. Teasdale (7), Rufus T. Firefly & Trentino (5)
Duck Soup quotes
Page 3 of 4You Swine!...You Worm!...You Upstart!
[Firefly slaps him with his glove]
Mrs. Teasdale. I'm afraid this regrettable occurrence may plunge our countries into war.
Oh, this is terrible!
I've said enough. I'm a man of few words.
I'm a man of one word: Scram!
Vera Oh, for heaven's sake, don't make a sound. If you found, you lost.
Oh, you crazy. How can I be lost if I'm found?
[to Chicolini]
I wanted to get a writ of habeas corpus, but I should have gotten a-rid of you instead.
Clear? Huh! Why a four-year-old child could understand this report. Run out and find me a four-year-old child. I can't make head or tail out of it.
Here are the plans of war. They're as valuable as your life. And that's putting them pretty cheap. Watch them like a cat watched her kittens. Have you ever had kittens? No, of course not, you're too busy running around playing bridge.
I could dance with you till the cows come home. On second thought, I'd rather dance with the cows till you came home.
I danced before Napoleon. No, Napoleon danced before me. In fact, he danced two hundred years before me.
I'd be unworthy of the high trust that's been placed in me if I didn't do everything in my power to keep our beloved Freedonia at peace with the world. I'd be only too happy to meet with Ambassador Trentino and offer him on behalf of my country the right hand of good fellowship. And I feel sure he will accept this gesture in the spirit of which it is offered. But suppose he doesn't? A fine thing that'll be. I hold out my hand and he refuses to accept. That'll add a lot to my prestige, won't it? Me, the head of a country, snubbed by a foreign ambassador. Who does he think he is, that he can come here, and make a sap of me in front of all my people? Think of it! I hold out my hand and that hyena refuses to accept! Why, the cheap four-flushing swine! He'll never get away with it, I tell you! He'll never get away with it!
I'll see my lawyer about this as soon as he graduates from law school.
I'm in a hurry! To the House of Representatives! Ride like fury! If you run out of gas, get ethyl. If Ethel runs out, get Mabel.
I've got a good mind to join a club and beat you over the head with it.