Count Dracula quotes from Dracula: Dead and Loving It (1995) ... Movie Quotes Database

Played by Leslie Nielsen

Dracula: Dead and Loving It (1995) · 35 quotes

Most-quoted character in Dracula: Dead and Loving It (1995): in 14 of its 35 quotes

A line from Count Dracula [in a dream, at a picnic]

I'm drinking wine, and I'm eating chicken!

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More lines from Count Dracula

5 quotes

Count Dracula

[a bat poops on the stairs]

Children of the night... what a mess they make!

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Count Dracula

[waking up from a bad dream]

Oh, it's night-time. I was having... a daymare.

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Count Dracula

[after rising from his coffin and hitting his head on a chandelier]

I must move the coffin. [pause] Or the chandelier.

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Count Dracula

[his last line]

Renfield, you asshole!

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Count Dracula

[embarrassed after hearing Renfield and Lucy screaming from outside]

Renfield, you idiot.

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Scenes with Count Dracula

8 scenes

Lover at Picnic

Would you care for some wine?

Dracula

I never drink... wine... oh, what the hell. Let me try it.

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Dracula

[Count Dracula meets up with Van Helsing]

Van Helsing... a name that is famous even in Translyvania.

Van Helsing

Dracula... are you by any chance descended from Vlad Tepeş, the first Dracula?

Dr. Seward

Tepeş?

Van Helsing

Yes, it means "the Impaler". He used to inflict horrendous tortures on the peasants; he gouged out their eyes, cut off their heads and stuck their bodies on iron spikes.

Dracula

They had it coming!

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Dracula

Renfield, you were having a nightmare.

Renfield

A nightmare? But it was so real, so vivid. Two voluptuous women, heaving and grinding. How to describe it? [pause] Have you ever been to Paris?

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Dracula

[Dracula is hypnotizing a valet at the theatre where Doctor Seward is enjoying an opera]

You will tell Doctor Seward there is a message for him in the lobby... and you will remember nothing of what I tell you.

Valet

[The valet nods her head, opens the curtain to Seward's chambers, and stands there with her mouth open for a few moments, then closes the curtain] [noticing Dracula standing there]

Hello, can I help you sir?

Dracula

[mimicking her]

Can I help you sir? [normally] What is the matter with you, why did you not tell him?

Valet

About what?

Dracula

About the message!

Valet

For whom?

Dracula

Never mind! I will tell him myself. And for your miserable performance, you will receive no tip!

Valet

No tip?

Dracula

Ah! That, you remember!

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Dracula

[Dracula picks up Jonathan by the throat]

Arrogant mortal! You are in my world now, and you will never leave this attic alive! I will destroy you, and then I will possess she whom you love the most. And there is not a single thing in the world you can do to stop me!

Dracula

[Dracula laughs. Jonathan pokes him in the eyes and Dracula drops Jonathan]

Ow!

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Dracula

[Dracula is outside Mina's room] [to the maid]

Essie... Essie... Your eyelids are growing heavy. You will sleep... sleep.

Dracula

[Essie nods off to sleep]

Mina... Mina, open your eyes!

Dracula

[She does]

Arise, Mina.

Dracula

[She does]

Walk to the door.

Dracula

[Mina opens a door, and goes inside]

Mina... you are in the closet. Open the door, and come out.

Dracula

[She does]

Now walk to the terrace door. Watch out for the foot...

Dracula

[Mina trips over the footstool]

...Stool. Stand up.

Dracula

[Essie and Mina both rise]

Not you. Sit!

Dracula

[Mina sits]

No, not you, you sit.

Dracula

[Essie sits]

You stand.

Dracula

[Both stand]

No! Sit!

Dracula

[Both sit]

No, you stand!

Dracula

[Both stand]

You walk to the terrace door, and you go back to sleep! Watch out!
[Essie and Mina bump into one another and fall to the floor. Dracula throws his arms up in frustration]

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Dracula

[Dracula exits the house, carrying a body]

You will be my bride for eternity... we will share the passions of immortal love.