2nd most-quoted character in Deadpool & Wolverine (2024): in 24 of its 97 quotes
Most scenes with: Wade Wilson / Deadpool (15), Cassandra Nova (2), Pyro (2)
Give me the **** dog. Talk to the girl.
James "Logan" Howlett / Wolverine I'm wearing this suit, and that means a lot of things, but most of all... it means I'm an X-Man. [to Cassandra] And I know your brother. As much as I wanna **** kill you -- every bone in my body wants to **** kill you! -- he wouldn't let me stand here and watch you die. [to Deadpool] Take your hands off. [to Cassandra] This is for him. This is for Charles.
James "Logan" Howlett / Wolverine You got a whole world to go back to. I got nothing. I got nothing. Give me this.
James "Logan" Howlett / Wolverine For the first time in my life, I'm proud to wear this suit. It means I'm an X-Man. I'm the X-Man.
Oh. Whiskey dick of the claws. It's quite common in Wolverines over forty.
Logan You don't want this.
You're right, I don't. And unless you wanna take a deep breath through your ****in' forehead, I suggest you reconsider. Let's go, peanut.
Were you even listening back there?! We don't make it back to that Mr. Paradox asshole, everyone I ****in' know is gonna die.
Wolverine Not my ****in' problem.
Oh, is that all you got? Is that what you said when your world went to shit?!
Wolverine Come again?
Yeah, I heard all about you -- how you screwed up everything? You should be thanking me for pulling me out of that bed you shit in.
Alright! **** it! Let's give the people what they came for!
Wolverine Let's **** go.
Hey! We fight each other, we lose.
Dear God, it's him.
Wolverine Who?
The one. The superhero equivalent to comfort food, or molly. A white guy's answer to all the disappointments, and another A-Lister. [to the mysterious variant] Fair warning, gorgeous: You're gonna encounter some indelicate language, a smidge of assplay, but we've been prohibited from using cocaine. On camera.
They're coming.
Who's "they?" [sees a group of variants in vehicles approaching] Oh they're driving angry.
Now THAT'S a superhero landing!
I got this. [takes off his hood and reveals he is played by Chris Evans]
Stay close.
Aye aye, Captain. You got this.
Cassandra is gonna be giddy when she sees what we caught. You can't run. Everybody knows that.
You see anyone running, dick-for-brains? [Deadpool looks at him in surprise] You're not gonna love what happens next.
Oh my God. Oh my God. He's gonna say it! Oh my God, he's gonna say it!
Wolverine Say what?
AVENGERS...
FLAME ON!
I'm sorry, what now?
Wolverine We don't know that guy.
We thought we did.
Ready to die?!
Wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait! Time! [to Logan, who has two katanas impaled through his chest and back, and a knife stuck in his shoulder] You look ridiculous! [he begins pulling them all out] People have waited decades for this fight. It's not gonna be easy. Baby knife! You shoot the double, you take him down. Side control. Then full mount, and ya ground and pound 'til he makes no sound because he's dead--
Wolverine Shut the **** up.
Oh, my God... Okay, good luck! I'm a huge fan.
How long was I asleep?
Wolverine Not all of you was asleep.
Wolverine You stupid piece of shit, you just got him ****in' killed!
Hey, we're ALL grieving! P.S., do you know what he was doing to the budget?!
Wolverine Get the **** off me.
Shh sh-sh...[grunting] almost done.
Wolverine Almost done what?
Getting my knife out of your buttocks, you [rips baby knife out of Wolverine's thigh] pervert!
You know, in my world, you're, um... You're well-regarded.
Wolverine Yeah, well, not in mine.
Yeah, they don't like me much in mine, either.
Wolverine You don't say?
I wanted to be something, you know? I... Shit, I wanted to be an Avenger.
Wolverine **** the Avengers.
Yeah. I didn't make the cut, though. Same with the X-Men. Then my girlfriend left me, and I just--
Wolverine You had a girlfriend?
Yeah! Vanessa. When we met, she was a dancer. We had a whole life. It was good. But oh boy, I just-- mwah. **** that right up. But you? You were an X-Man. **** that, you were the X-Man, you... The Wolverine! He was a hero in my world.
Wolverine Yeah, well... he ain't shit in mine.
Look, mijo. I know you're hurting. My blind, elderly African-American roommate Blind Al always says that pain teaches us who we are. Sometimes, we need to listen to that pain instead of running from it.
Wolverine Holy shit.
Yeah, she's wise.
Wolverine No, no, no, that's her name? You call her "Blind Al"?
Well, she's blind.
Why are you so nice?
Well, it costs nothing to be kind.
Wolverine Shutting the **** up is also free.
Caliente.
Wolverine Did you say you made an educated **** wish?
They call me "the Merc with the Mouth". They don't call me "Truthful Timmy, the Blowjob Queen of Saskatoon". [Wolverine yanks his claws out of Deadpool's thigh]
Wolverine One more word. Please, give me one.
Gubernatorial. [Wolverine raises his fist, causing Deadpool to flinch]
Wolverine You know what? You're a **** joke. No wonder the Avengers didn't take you or the X-Men, and they'll take **** anyone. I mean, you are a ridiculous, immature, half-wit moron. I have never met a sadder, more attention-starved, jabbering little prick in my entire life and that says a lot 'cause I've been alive for more than two hundred **** years, and I'll tell ya, that bald chick was right about one thing: You will never save the world! You couldn't even save a relationship with a goddamn stripper! And mother****er, I wish I could say you'd die alone, but it's one of God's best jokes that you can't die, EXCEPT THAT'S ON ALL OF US! [Deadpool looks down, silently enraged] Oh, you got nothin' to say, Mouth?!
Wolverine Oh, are you? [Deadpool throws a punch in far more rage, violence, and aggressiveness than before, causing Wolverine's nose to bleed] Oh, you motherf-! [a very, VERY lengthy fight ensues as the two duke it out]
I take it all back, the Honda Odyssey ****s hard. Too bad you don't, needle dick.[motions for a round two]
Wolverine Oh, we're just getting started, bub.
[they continue fighting for hours, until they get exhausted and faint]
I got to have a life because of you. I got to grow up because of you. A lot of kids did.
Wolverine A lot of kids didn't grow up because of me. Trust me, kid, I'm no hero.
That suit says different.
Wolverine You like it? Scott used to beg me to wear it. So did Jean, Storm, Beast. All of 'em. They wanted me to be part of the team, but I wouldn't. Told 'em they all look ****in' ridiculous, and... I couldn't have 'em thinking I wanted to be there. And one day, while I was off on my own, the humans came and went mutant hunting.
I can guess the rest.
Wolverine No, no, let... Let me say it. I, I need to say it. By the time I stumbled home, shitfaced from the bar, it was too late. They were dead, every... And this suit's all I've got to remind me of who they were. And what I did.
Logan I walked away. They called after me, and I... I walked away. I always do.
I know. But that's not all you did, is it? You found them. The X-Men.
Logan Dead. Piled like wood.
What did you do?
Logan I started killing. And I couldn't stop. I didn't wanna stop.
All those bad men...
Logan It's not just the bad ones.
My little animal.
Logan I turned the whole world against the X-Men. Just once, I wanna be the man that Charles thought I was.
Oh-ho-ho, you have no idea what it's like! Day after day, shovel the shit, "fetch the meats"! I have spent my entire exis--
Wolverine Not everyone gets a speech.
My brother loved you?
Wolverine He loved all of us.
Must be nice.
Wolverine He would've loved you, too. If he knew about you. If he knew where you were, he would've torn a hole in the **** universe to bring you home.
This is my home.
Wolverine Well then at least let us save his.
Holy shit! You save the good stuff for special occasions?
Wolverine Killing, mostly.
What's the wind resistance on those blowjob handles? Sorry! Just a catty bitch when I'm jealous. Let's do this. Maximum effort.
Wolverine Whoever it is you think I am, you got the wrong guy.
You were always the wrong guy. Until you weren't.
So what are you gonna do next?
Logan I'll figure it out. I always do.
Alright. So I'll probably see you around?
Logan Probably not. See you, bub.
