Most scenes together: Batman (Terry McGinnis) & The Joker (7), The Joker & Flashback (7), Batman (Terry McGinnis) & Flashback (5)
How could you help Joker do it, Harley?
Okay, so he roughed the kid up a little. But I'll make it right.
Yeah, you're Mother of the Stinkin' Year! [In the edited cut, "stinkin'" was replaced with "freakin'"]
Ha, you'll see... we'll be one big happy family!
I'll break you in two...
Oh, Batman, if you had the guts for that kind of fun, you'd have done it years ago. I on the other hand... [The Joker produces a knife from his sleeve, cuts Batman across the chest and stabs it in above his knee, or in the edited cut, he just punches him; in either case, he jumps down to the wounded Batman] You've lost, Batman. Robin is mine. The last sound you'll hear will be our laughter.
It can't be.
Oh no. Your old eyes do not deceive you, Brucie! After all, [whispers] who'd know me better than you?
Batman showed up and we had to ditch, but we were able to save this: the console's memory board. [Chucko slides the board to Joker, who is sitting across the table. Joker catches it.] I know it's not much, but-
It's not much? It's nothing. [smashes the memory board] Losers, all of you, a disgrace to the name Joker, why in my day...
In your day?! Ever since you conned your way into this gang it's been "in your day" this, "in your day" that.
Bonk.
Your day is over, old man, even if you are who you say you are; and personally, I think you're a fake.
Ah, brave new world, that has such putzes in it.
He's got us running around, ripping out a lot of geek junk, but no cash! He won't tell us what his plan is, even if he has one! I want out!
Hey, man, take it easy! I-I was, I was just kidding!
So was I! [The Joker chuckles and waves the gun, then shoots the flag into Bonk's chest] Oops! No I wasn't! That's also how we did it in my day. You know, kids, a lot has changed since your old Uncle Joker's been away: new Gotham, new rules, even a new Batman. But now I'm tanned, I'm rested, and I'm ready to give this town a wedgie again! I have to know you're with me. Will you say it for me one time?
We're with you!
A little louder.
We're with you!
Dee-Dee?
We're with you!
Boys?
We're with you!
Bonk? Oh, right. Dead! [pauses and grins brightly] Dee-Dee, be a lamb and sweep out the trash. There's a good girls! [Dee-Dee Twins manage to get Bonk off of the table] Your renewed faith puts a smile in my heart! Let's say we forget about tonight's mishap and start over?
Great, Boss!
Ghoul, m'boy, we're gonna need a new systems scanner; who's got one that they'd be willing to donate?
Checking... What we're after is cutting edge. It's the only other place we can find one.
What? There? Security's gonna be tight.
Oh, yes! But think of the fun!
I thought talking about it would get easier over time, but some hurts never go away. Dick Grayson - Nightwing - had left to establish himself in another city. There were three of us then: Bruce, myself, and Robin... Tim Drake. [Robin is seen gliding over Gotham's rooftops] Robin was out alone that night when he came upon a woman in trouble.
Help! Help! Somebody, please help!
Hero time! [grapples down to the ground and knocks out two thugs] That evens things up a little.
Not really, bird-boy! [knocks Robin out with her mallet, as the Joker enters the scene]
We soon realized Tim was missing. Night after night, we scoured the city, running down every lead, pressing every underworld connection... but no one had seen any sign of Robin. For three agonizing weeks, there was nothing. Then, one night, we were sent an invitation...
Arkham.
The asylum had been moved to a newer high-security building. The old building had been partially demolished, and hung open like a rotting wound.
We buried the Joker deep beneath Arkham. The only other person who knew what happened that night was my father, the first Commissioner Gordon. He promised to keep our secret. [In the edited version, the line, "We buried the Joker deep beneath Arkham," was removed before the next line "The only other person who knew what happened that night was my father, the first Commissioner Gordon. And for Robin's sake, he kept that night a secret."] With his last act of cruelty, the Joker tainted us all with compromise and deception. [turns to Terry] I suppose he had the last laugh after all.
I'm assuming his girlfriend bought it, too. [Edited version: "And since you saw Harley fall into the pit..."]
We never found her body, but I doubt she'd be starting trouble now.
And Tim?
We had a trusted friend, Dr. Leslie Thompkins. It took her a year, but she was able to help Tim back to sanity. ["Back to himself" in the edited version] Still, things were never really the same. Bruce forbade Tim to be Robin again; he blamed himself for what happened and swore he'd never endanger another young partner. Tim left us soon after that, determined to make it on his own.
Did they ever patch things up?
Tim tried once or twice, but you know Bruce. I check up on Tim now and then. He's a top-level communications engineer, married, couple kids. Not too bad, all things considered.
He deserved a happy ending... but he still has the most likely connection to that night.
Oh.
Joy.
Well, if it isn't old mister Wayne.
So debonair.
So dapper.
So decrepit.
Sweetie, get mommy's bazooka!
Delia and Deidre Dennis, your grandmother's paid your bail. You're released to her custody, pending your trial.
Oh, joy.
You rotten little scamps! I struggle to make a good home for you and this is the thanks I get! (She whacks the Dee Dee twins with a cane) Break a Grandmother's heart, I hope they throw the book at you!
Oh, shut up Nana Harley!
Where's the Joker?
Joker?
Drop the act, I know you are working for him.
No, Joker's gone. I don't know where he is, really.
The suit's sensors aren't picking up any pulse fluctuations. He's telling the truth.
I don't do this anymore. I have a home and family. I gave this up years ago. Kids' stuff, that's all it was.
He may be telling the truth, but he's still wacked.
Fun and games. Boy wonder playing the hero. Fighting the bad guys and no one ever gets...(then suddenly realizes) Oh God, (puts his hands on his head) I killed him. I didn't mean to. I tried so hard to forget, but I still hear the shot, still see his dead smile. Every night, the dreams get stronger. He's there when I sleep, whispering, laughing, telling me that I'm as bad as he is! We're both the same!
I'm calling an ambulance.
No, I'm alright. Forgive me, Terry. Old nasty memories twisting inside me like bad oysters. Nothing really. I'm perfectly fine now.
How do you know my name?
There's nothing about you I don't know, Batfake.
Terry!
Have a timeout, kid, can't let you spoil the party too soon. And Bruce, I'm sure you've got your monkey-boy wired somehow. That's just peachy, cause I want you to see every minute of this; it's a killer.
My God!
Ooh, I never get tired of that.
Drake, you're the Joker?
That flabby oaf doesn't realize I'm using him as a timeshare. Beneath this puckish exterior lies the mind of a genius years ahead of my time. In the weeks young Robin was under my tutelage, I used him as the subject of my greatest experiment: utilizing cutting-edge genetics technology, which I had pinched here and there, I encoded my DNA on a microchip and set it into BirdBoy's BirdBrain, [points to a dot on the back of his neck] here. Everything that was me has been'a sleeping all comfy and cozy inside Tim Drake's subconscious. At first I had to limit the time I spent in Drake's body. He's not aware of what I do, chalking up lingering memories to bad dreams. If his family misses him, I simply call wifey and tell her, [Imitating Drake's voice] "I'm working late, honey." [Goes back to his own voice] The changes come at will now, and soon I'll be strong enough to live in this body permanently. Mr. J's on the rebound, baby! My comeback party's gonna set the whole town on fire!
Gordon told me what happened to Tim Drake.
That's why I didn't want you going up against the Joker. Imposter or not.
Nothing against your old partners, but I'm a completely different Batman. I was never a Robin, I never- [notices the tattered Robin costume] Wait... Joker smashed up the cases, but why was this the only costume he went out of his way to destroy?
Robin did shoot him.
A ghost out for revenge? I don't buy it. I talked to Drake; he's got less love for that costume than the Joker. I think somehow he's behind this.
That's crazy.
So was Drake, once. Look. Here's a readout of everything the Jokerz have stolen. Now let's combine them into something that would be used by a communications expert. Someone of Tim Drake's caliber.
Satellite jamming system. Whoever uses this can access satellite defenses and fire them at will.
Someone already has. I suspected Jordan Price of being the Joker. But the Jokerz were on your company yacht trying to slag Price. I got him off the boat before someone blasted it into splinters. I hate to say it, but I think your little Robin has turned into a bitter old crow. He's gotta be the brains behind this new Joker. It's harsh. But who else is there?
It's funny. I know about all your other major enemies, but you never mention him. He was the biggest, wasn't he?
It wasn't a popularity contest. He was a psychopath. A monster.
So how is it possible he could still be around after all this time?
It's not possible. He died years ago.
You're sure?
I was there.
[Bruce gets up starts walking away. There's a beat of silence] Terry [softly]: You killed him... didn't you? [Bruce stops and hangs his head, but still doesn't look at him] He was gonna do something so terrible that you had no other choice. That was it, wasn't it?
So... The Joker, huh? Must be spry for a guy who's like... mid-eighties? Any theories on that? Clone? Robot? Suspended animation after being frozen in a block of ice?
Shut up and drive.
Yes, sir.
C'mon, McGinnis! Laugh it up now, you miserable little punk! LAUGH! [in a sing-song tone] I CAN'T HEAR YOU!
Ha... ha. [jabs joybuzzer into the back of the Joker's neck, As the Joker screams in pain frying the microchip and destroying the Joker forever, before Terry puts his mask back on]
