CB Commissioner Barbara Gordon
[beginning the flashback]
I thought talking about it would get easier over time, but some hurts never go away. Dick Grayson - Nightwing - had left to establish himself in another city. There were three of us then: Bruce, myself, and Robin... Tim Drake. [Robin is seen gliding over Gotham's rooftops] Robin was out alone that night when he came upon a woman in trouble.
W Woman
Help! Help! Somebody, please help!
R Robin
Hero time! [grapples down to the ground and knocks out two thugs] That evens things up a little.
[The "woman in trouble" is soon revealed to be Harley Quinn...]
Not really, bird-boy! [knocks Robin out with her mallet, as the Joker enters the scene]
[chuckles]
A bird in the hand...
CB Commissioner Barbara Gordon
[narrating, as Batman and Batgirl search for Robin]
We soon realized Tim was missing. Night after night, we scoured the city, running down every lead, pressing every underworld connection... but no one had seen any sign of Robin. For three agonizing weeks, there was nothing. Then, one night, we were sent an invitation...
[Batman and Batgirl arrive on a rooftop, seeing a jack-in-the-box. Batman opens it with a batarang, but the "jack" triggers a grenade, exploding the box. In the remains, Batman picks up a straitjacket, realizing where Robin is...]
Arkham.
CB Commissioner Barbara Gordon
[narrating]
The asylum had been moved to a newer high-security building. The old building had been partially demolished, and hung open like a rotting wound.
You know, Bats, we've been doing this little runaround of ours for years. It's been loads of laughs, but sad fact is, none of us are getting any younger.
That old clock's a'tickin'!
Quite right, poo. And Harley and I thought it was time to start a family. Add a "Joker Junior" to our merry brood.
But rather than go through all the joys of childbirth, [makes disgusted face] we decided to adopt.
We couldn't do it legally, but then we remembered that you always have a few spare kids lying around — so we borrowed one.
[Joker and Harley open the curtain, revealing a shadowed figure strapped to a table.]
No...
He needed a little molding, of course; what kid doesn't? But, in time, we came to love him as our own. Say hello, J.J.!
[Robin appears from the shadows, mutilated to look like the Joker and laughing mindlessly]
B Batgirl
How could you help Joker do it, Harley?
Okay, so he roughed the kid up a little. But I'll make it right.
B Batgirl
Yeah, you're Mother of the Stinkin' Year! [In the edited cut, "stinkin'" was replaced with "freakin'"]
[grabs a boulder to bash Batgirl in the head with]
Ha, you'll see... we'll be one big happy family!
What's the matter, Batman? No witty comeback? No threat? Then I'll provide the narration... [the screen flickers to life, showing "Our Family Memories"] I'll begin with how I peeled back the layers of the boy's mind. [In the edited version, he says, "I'll begin with how I affected young Robin's makeover."] Oh, he bravely tried to fight it at first. You would've been proud to see him so strong - but all too soon, the serums and the shocks took their toll... and the dear lad began to share such secrets with me. [In the edited cut, "the serums and the shocks took their toll... and" was cut] Secrets that are mine alone to know... Bruce. It's true, Batsy! I know everything. And kinda like the kid who peeks at his Christmas presents, I must admit, it's sadly anti-climactic. Behind all the sturm and batarang, you're just a little boy in a playsuit, crying for mommy and daddy! It'd be funny if it weren't so pathetic. [pause] Oh, what the heck, I'll laugh anyway! HA HA HA HA HA HAA!
Oh, Batman, if you had the guts for that kind of fun, you'd have done it years ago. I on the other hand... [The Joker produces a knife from his sleeve, cuts Batman across the chest and stabs it in above his knee, or in the edited cut, he just punches him; in either case, he jumps down to the wounded Batman] You've lost, Batman. Robin is mine. The last sound you'll hear will be our laughter.
[Director's Cut version] [tosses the bang flag spear gun to Tim]
Here you go, sonny boy! [Tim grabs the gun] Make daddy proud: deliver the punchline.
[Tim aims the gun at Batman, then pulls the trigger and a "Bang!" flag pops up harmlessly]
Tim...
[Tim pauses a bit, still laughing]
DO IT!
[Tim laughs for a bit, but slowly breaks out of the brainwashing effect, then turns around and fires the gun at the Joker instead, where the flag spear pierces his heart, and he gets flown and knocked into giant building blocks] [dying]
That's not funny... that's not...
[The Joker gets choked up in blood, then falls to the floor, dead; As Barbara runs in, Tim's insane laughter quickly becomes uncontrollable sobbing and he falls to his knees]
[Edited version] [tosses laughing gas gun to Tim]
Here you go, sonny boy! [Tim grabs the gun] Make him one of us!
[Tim aims the gun at Batman, He lowers the gun, then throws it away Bruce smiles but the Joker snarls. Tim still laughing tackles the Joker into the next room with tanks of water near electrical wiring, where he crashes into one and tries going after Tim but slips and turns on the electrical wiring; scene cuts to far away from the room, where the Joker's horrific death scream is heard, As Barbara runs in, Tim's insane laughter quickly becomes uncontrollable sobbing and he falls to his knees]
CB Commissioner Barbara Gordon
[ends the flashback]
We buried the Joker deep beneath Arkham. The only other person who knew what happened that night was my father, the first Commissioner Gordon. He promised to keep our secret. [In the edited version, the line, "We buried the Joker deep beneath Arkham," was removed before the next line "The only other person who knew what happened that night was my father, the first Commissioner Gordon. And for Robin's sake, he kept that night a secret."] With his last act of cruelty, the Joker tainted us all with compromise and deception. [turns to Terry] I suppose he had the last laugh after all.
I'm assuming his girlfriend bought it, too. [Edited version: "And since you saw Harley fall into the pit..."]
CB Commissioner Barbara Gordon
We never found her body, but I doubt she'd be starting trouble now.
CB Commissioner Barbara Gordon
We had a trusted friend, Dr. Leslie Thompkins. It took her a year, but she was able to help Tim back to sanity. ["Back to himself" in the edited version] Still, things were never really the same. Bruce forbade Tim to be Robin again; he blamed himself for what happened and swore he'd never endanger another young partner. Tim left us soon after that, determined to make it on his own.
Did they ever patch things up?
CB Commissioner Barbara Gordon
Tim tried once or twice, but you know Bruce. I check up on Tim now and then. He's a top-level communications engineer, married, couple kids. Not too bad, all things considered.
He deserved a happy ending... but he still has the most likely connection to that night.
