Kumar Patel Roldy! Roldy! Dude, you gotta come quick. There's these two filthy pussies just aching to get boned by us! [total silence] I mean--duh--that there are these two lovely young pussies who would like to have a chat with you and I.
Kumar Patel Kumar Patel Hello-o-o-o, New Brunswick!
Kumar Patel Shotgun anus!
Edward [as the White Bitch pulls up in her turbo sled]
Whoa, Stifler's mom!
[unrated version] Whoa, MILF!
Edward [in his old age]
Chuck Norris rules.
Edward Damn that plot of Superman Returns!
Kumar Patel His dick smells like shit dude!
Kumar Patel Dude, whats a blumpkin?
Kumar Patel Meet the smokeless bong
Taj Mahal Badalandabad This is the Great White Barry.
Taj Mahal Badalandabad You...you...you....you pussy ass mother ****er dick sucker!
Taj This is the culmination of my being.
Naomi Baby, I'm about to culminate, now get over here.
Kumar Patel Uh, miss, I'm sorry, but I'm not going to let you rape my friend on Christmas Eve.
Kumar Patel [Upon being asked to go to a Christmas Eve party]
No can do man. I have to stay here and smoke this weed, otherwise I won't get high.
Kumar Patel [Adrian: Also, I told her you work for the White House.]
Yeah, like anyone's gonna believe that.