Excuse me, why are you here? What's the matter?

I tell you what is the matter. [frat boys laugh, speaking in normal accent] These old townies trashed our frat house! And nobody treats our good-times headquarters with disrespect! [all frat boys yell "Yeah!"]

They didn't do it. Me do it.

Don't try and cover for him, Z-Dog!

Lenny Feder

Who's Z-Dog?

We know they're trying to get back at us for making them do the naked plunge in our swimming hole.

Your swimming hole? I've been swimming at the quarry since I was eight years old.

Apparently, everybody in this crap town has been swimming there since they were eight years old. I guess nobody wants to leave this dump because they're too busy sucking! [all frat boys cheer, Andy and Milo do their handshake, but stop in the middle] We'll finish later.

You promise?

I promise.

Okay.

Hey, smart guy! Lenny Feder left this town, moved to Hollywood, made big bucks, probably more money than all you brainiacs put together ever will. But guess what? He came back here. 'Cause this beautiful town is his home. And it always will be his home. [looks at Lenny, who nods of approval, Dickey raises his beer, and takes a drink]

Well, that was just a moving testament to this community, bro! But we didn't come here to hear any lame speeches. We came here to kick some old, smelly ass! [frat boys cheer, Milo turns around and bends over, and Andy slaps his butt three times]

Lenny Feder

Fellas, we may be old.

We may be smelly.

We may have a penis. [she, Roxanne, and a drunk woman point at Beefcake Kitty]

Eric Lamonsoff

But the only ones getting their ass kicked around here is gonna be you spoiled, privileged, uppity, preppy D-bags.

You hear that? Now let's get BUSY!! [everyone starts fighting]