Chet quotes from The Great Outdoors (1988)

Chet

You bastard, you bastard!

Roman

I think he's saying go faster.

He's been struck by lightning... how many times has it been now, Reg?

S-s-s-s-s-s-s-six...

Chet

Six times?

S-s-s-s-s-s-s-s-s-sixty-sixty-six times. In-n-n-n-n-n-n-In-n-n-n-n-n-n-In-n-n-n-n-n-n the head!

Chet

And by the way, don't try to steal any of our stuff on your way out!

Stuff? What stuff is there to steal?

Oh, we got stuff!

You're a louse!

Well, why don't you go find yourself a spin cycle!

Chet

Yeah, go find yourself a spin cycle! (turning to Connie) What the hell does that mean?

Ahh!

Roman

What?

It touched me!

Roman

It's been touching you for 12 years. You never freak!

Not you!

A thing.

Roman

What thing?

Chet

What's going on?

That thing!

Roman

Oh, it's just a little sparrow.

Come on, Roman. It's got ears!
[everyone screams and runs out of the cabin]

Dad?

Chet

Yes, Ben?

Does this mean we won't be getting Christmas presents this year from Aunt Kate and Uncle Roman?

Oh, blow it out of your ass, Ben!

Okay, nobody is blowing anything out of their ass. What we are having is a little problem, and it doesn't mean your father and I don't love your Aunt Kate and Uncle Roman, what it means is that we're having some emotions.

Chet

What it means, what it means is that I would like to blow Uncle Roman out of my ass, that's what it means!

I don't want to hear anything else about anyone blowing anything out of their ass!

You might as well blow the whole family out of your ass while you're at it, Dad!

Chet

Do you understand what's going on here, son? Do you know what your mother and I are trying to say?

Aunt Kate and Uncle Roman are incredible butt-heads, right?
Chet and Connie (in unison): Exactly!