George Simmons Are you mad that you died at the end of Die Hard?
Played by Adam Sandler 
Funny People (2009) · 11 quotes
Funny People (2009) · 11 quotes
Most-quoted character in Funny People (2009): in 6 of its 11 quotes
A line from George SimmonsIs your act just designed to make sure no girl will ever sleep with you again? All you **** talk about is jacking off and farting. You think a girl's going to come up to afterward and be like, "Oh, would you just jack off for me and then fart in my face?" That's **** insane. Do you want to get laid, ever?
More lines from George Simmons
1 quote George Simmons Scenes with George Simmons
4 scenes
Dr. Lars
It's too early to know who's winning the fight: the medicine or the disease.
George Did anybody ever tell you you have a scary accent?
Dr. Lars
You are a very funny man. I enjoy your movies.
George And I enjoy all of your movies.
Pieter Vanhecke
Matthias is een platte gast.
Dr. Lars
[surprised]
Which movies?
George The ones where you try to kill Bruce Willis.
George So, Ira Wright? That's not your real name. You're hiding some Judaism.
Ira
I don't think I can hide that. My face is circumcised.
Clarke
So, you're going to kill Cameron Diaz, eh? That girl is a menace to society, isn't she? **** her! [laughs, then looks at Laura] What? She's on my free pass list. Who's on yours?
Laura
George.
Clarke
[points at George]
This George?
George Look out.
Laura
Yeah.
Clarke
Oh, well. Then I just want Cameron dead. Over her dead body.
Laura
No cussing in your standup.
George That takes out half of my act.
