Cameron Frye I feel like complete shit, Ferris. I can't go anywhere.
2nd most-quoted character in Ferris Bueller's Day Off (1986): in 31 of its 88 quotes
Most scenes with: Ferris Bueller (18), Sloane Peterson (3)
Hey, batter-batter-batter, hey, batter-batter-batter-swing-batter! He can't hit, and he can't hit, and he can't hit, and he can't hit, swing batter!
More lines from Cameron Frye
9 quotes Cameron Frye Cameron Frye Hey, remember how mad he got when I broke my retainer? Come on, that was just a little piece of plastic. This is a Ferrari.
Cameron Frye [singing]
When Cameron was in Egypt's land... let my Cameron go.
Cameron Frye He'll keep calling me. He'll keep calling me until I come over. He'll make me feel guilty... This is- this is ridiculous. OK. I'll go, I'll go, I'll go, I'll go, I'll go, with--I'll go. Shit! [starts car and yells in frustration] God damn it!
Cameron Frye I am not going to sit on my ass as the events that affect me unfold to determine the course of my life. I'm going to take a stand. I'm going to defend it. Right or wrong, I'm going to defend it.
Cameron Frye Look, don't make me participate in your stupid crap if you don't like the way I do it! You make me get out of bed. You make me come over. You make me make a phony phone call to Edward Rooney? The man could squash my nuts into oblivion. And, and, and then, and then, you deliberately hurt my feelings.
Cameron Frye Pardon my French, but you're an asshole! Asshole!
Cameron Frye Call me 'sir', goddamn it! (to Edward Rooney over the phone, impersonating Sloane Peterson's father)
Cameron Frye Ferris Bueller, you're my hero.
Scenes with Cameron Frye
21 scenes
Cameron, babe! What's happening?
Cameron Very little.
Is your mother in the room?
Cameron She's in Decatur. Unfortunately she's not staying.
If you're not over here in fifteen minutes, you can find a new best friend.
Cameron You've been saying that since the fifth grade.
Cameron [Whispering to himself after hanging up from a phone call with Ferris]
I'm dying.
[Phone rings, and Cameron answers] [over the phone]
You're not dying, you just can't think of anything good to do. Now be a man! Take some Pepto Bismol and come over here!
Where's your brain?
Cameron Why'd you kick me?
Where's your brain?
Cameron Why'd you kick me?
Where's your brain?
Cameron I asked you first.
How can we pick up Sloane if Rooney is there with her?
Cameron I said for her to be there alone and you freaked.
Now, I didn't hit you. I lightly slapped you.
Cameron You hit me. Look don't make me participate in your stupid crap if you don't like the way I do it. You make me get out of bed, you make me come over here. You make me make a phony phone call to Edward Rooney? The man could squash my nuts into oblivion. And-and-and then, and then, you deliberately hurt my feelings.
Cameron The 1961 Ferrari 250 GT California. Less than a hundred were made. My father spent three years restoring this car. It is his love. It is his passion...
It is his fault he didn't lock the garage.
Cameron Ferris, my father loves this car more than life itself.
A man with priorities so far out of whack doesn't deserve such a fine automobile.
Cameron No. No! Apparently, you don't understand!
Wow.
Cameron Ferris, he never drives it! He just rubs it with a diaper!
Mr. Rooney would never believe Mr. Peterson drives that piece of shit.
Cameron It's not piece of shit.
It is a piece of shit! Don't worry about it, I don't even have a piece of shit! I have to envy yours.
Cameron Oh, thanks.
Look, it's real simple. Whatever mileage we put on, we'll take off.
Cameron How?
We'll drive home backwards.
Cameron [Ferris slowly pulls the Ferrari out of the garage]
No, Ferris. I'm putting my foot down. You're just gonna have to think of something else. Ferris! We could call a limo! One of those stretch jobs with the TV and the bar. How about that?
What are we going to do?
The question isn't "what are we going to do," the question is "what aren't we going to do?"
Cameron Please don't say were not going to take the car home. Please don't say were not going to take the car home. Please don't say were not going to take the car home.
[to the camera]
If you had access to a car like this, would you take it back right away? Neither would I.
Garage Attendant You guys got nothing to worry about, I'm a professional.
Cameron A professional what?
What could happen to it? It's in a garage.
Cameron It could get wrecked, stolen, scratched, breathed on wrong, a pigeon could shit on it! Who knows?
The city looks so peaceful from up here.
Anything looks peaceful from one thousand three hundred and fifty-three feet.
Cameron I think I see my dad.
Cameron Okay Ferris, can we just let it go, please?
Ferris, please. You've gone too far. We're going to get busted.
A: You can never go too far. B: If I'm gonna get busted, it is not gonna be by a guy like that.
Four thousand restaurants in the downtown area, I pick the one my father goes to.
Cameron We're pinched, for sure.
Only the meek get pinched. The bold survive. [adjusts his beret] Let's go.
Cameron Let's surrender.
Never.
Cameron I don't know what I'm gonna do.
College.
Cameron Yeah, but to do what?
What are you interested in?
Cameron Nothing.
Me neither!
Cameron [to Ferris, who's singing on the parade float]
You're crazy!
What do you think Ferris is gonna do?
Cameron [Ferris begins singing "Twist and Shout"] [after a pause]
He's gonna be a fry cook on Venus.
Cameron, what have you seen today?
Cameron Nothing good.
Nothing - wha - what do you mean nothing good? We've seen everything good. We've seen the whole city! We went to a museum, we saw priceless works of art! We ate pancreas!
Cameron? How many miles did you say this thing had when we left?
Cameron One hundred and twenty six and halfway between three and four tenths. Why? How many miles are on it now? [glances at odometer, which reads 301.7 miles]
[to audience]
Here's where Cameron goes berserk.
[Cameron screams, which can be heard all aroun Chicago]
Cameron What'd I do?
You killed the car.
Yes, that's what Mr. Peterson said. I had Florence Sparrow notify Sloane, poor little lamb.
Oh it's so hard to tell these days. I do see her with Ferris Bueller quite a little bit.
Would you get me Mr. Peterson's daytime number, please?
Sure. [picks up ringing phone] Ed Rooney's office.
Cameron [disguising his voice]
This is George Peterson.
Oh! Uh, please hold. [to Rooney] What do ya know? It's Mr. Peterson. You still want his daytime number? [realizing, as Rooney shoots her a dirty look] Oh.
Cameron Ed. This is George Peterson.
How are you today, sir?
Cameron Well, we've had a bit of bad luck this morning as you may have heard.
Cameron Yeah. Yeah. Well, uh, it's been a tough morning, and, uh, we got a lot of family business to take care of, so if you wouldn't mind excusing Sloane, I'd appreciate it.
Uh, sure. Y'know, I'd be happy to. Yeah. You, uh, you-you just produce a corpse, and, uh, I'll release Sloane. I wanna see this dead grandmother first hand.
[covering the phone; thinking he's talking to Ferris Bueller]
It's alright, Grace, it's Ferris Bueller, the little twerp. I'm gonna set a trap, and let him fall right into it.
Ooh!
Cameron Uh, uh, Ed, I-I'm sorry, did-- Did you say you wanted to see a body?
Yeah, that's right, just, uh, roll her old bones on over here, and I'll dig up your daughter. You know, that's school policy.
Cameron Oh.
Uh, was this your mother?
Cameron Uh, n-no, my wife's mother.
Hi, this is Ferris Bueller. Can I speak to Mr. Rooney, please? Thank you.
Tell ya what, dipshit. You don't like my policies, you can come on down here and smooch my big ol' white butt.
Pucker up, Buttercup. [to Grace; quietly] What?
Ferris Bueller's on Line 2.
[Mr. Rooney freezes, turning to the phone in horror] [Over the phone]
Hiya, Mr. Rooney, how ya doin? Listen, I'm sorry to disturb you at work but I'm not feeling very well today and I was wondering if it might be possible for my sister to bring home any assignments from my classes that I might need. Have a nice day. [Hangs up]
Where's your brain!?
Cameron Why'd you kick me!?
Where's your brain!?
Cameron Why'd you kick me?
Where's your brain?
Cameron I asked you first.
How can we pick up Sloane if Rooney is there with her?
Cameron I said for her to be there alone and you freaked.
And I, I didn't hit you. I lightly slapped you.
Cameron You hit me. Look, don't ask me to participate in your stupid crap if you don't like the way I do it. [Ferris makes a mocking face] You make me get out of bed, you make me come over here. You make me make a phony phone call to Edward Rooney!? The man could squash my nuts into oblivion and then, and then, you deliberately hurt my feelings.
No, no, I did not. I didn't deliberately hurt your feelings
Cameron Oh, really? Really?
No, no, I didn't.
[Cameron takes his jersey off the coat rack and heads for the front door]
What are you doing?
Cameron See you later, pal. I'm going home.
Oh, come on, come on, don't do that.
Cameron Have a nice life.
Oh, Cameron, wait a minute. Come back. I didn't mean to lose my temper. I'm sorry, it was uncalled for.
Cameron You serious?
Yeah. Here you go. [Hands him a cup of tea]
Cameron Thank you.
You did screw up though, right? I mean, not that it was completely your fault.
Cameron Why?
Well, to fix the situation, I'm going to have to ask you for a small favor.
