I spotted a couple of broken burglar bars underneath the back door to Bean's secret cider cellar.
We're breaking into Bean's house?
Where he keeps the cider.
Ash [appears behind them]
Below where he lives.
Where'd you come from? You go back to the tree and do your homework.
Ash I wanna help you steal some cider.
We're going to a book party, and you keep your mouth shut about any cider because no one ever said that. Now get out of here!
Ash But-- Uh..
But Nothing! You're gonna get me in a lot of trouble! Besides, you're too little and uncoordinated. [Ash scowls, twitches his ear and spits and Mr. Fox points at the tree] One, two, three! [Ash growls with rage and storms back to the tree] Where the cuss does that kid get off? Can you believe that? How did he get tipped off?
Ash [after Mr. Fox has just lost his tail in the shooting]
It'll-- It'll grow back, won't it?
Ash Tails don't grow back?
Uh-uh. Except for lizards.
Tails don't grow back. I'm gonna be tail-less for the rest of my life.
Ash Well, anyway, it's not half as bad as double pneumonia, right? I mean, his dad's got one foot in the grave and three feet on a banana peel. That's a lot worse than just...
[ricochets an acorn around the room, which lands in the teacup he is holding. The others glare in amazement]
Excuse me, everyone. I'm gonna go meditate for half an hour.
[exits quickly and slams the door] [to Ash, sternly]
You have got twenty-nine minutes to come up with a proper apology.
Ash [snaps, gestures wildly]
Me? Me have an apology? He gets a bandit hat? He just got here, and he gets a bandit hat? Where's my bandit hat? Why didn't I get shot at? It's because, you... you... YOU THINK I'M NO GOOD AT ANYTHING!!! Well, maybe you're right, thanks. [stomps away angrily and closes door upon exit]
[sighs; to Mr. Fox]
Told ya not to bring him.
[yelling]
YOU SCARED THE CUSS OUT OF US!!!!!!
[growls angrily]
A lot of good animals are [yelling with rage] PROBABLY GONNA DIE...BECAUSE OF YOU!!! [everyone looks shocked] [angry tone] We've been digging in circles for three days! Half the woods have been obliterated, nobody can get out, Right now my wife's huddled at the bottom of the flint-mine with no food, no water, and 27 Starving Animal Brats!
P Phil
I just want to see a little...sunshine.
But you're nocturnal, Phil. Your eyes barely even open on a good day.
P Phil
I'm sick of your double talk! We have rights!
BS Beaver's Son
We don't like you and we hate your dad. Now grab some of that mud, chew it in your mouth, and swallow it.
Ash I'm not gonna eat mud!
BS Beaver's Son
Cuss yeah, you are! [picks up a large glob of mud and shoves it in Ash's face. Ash makes a gagging sound but does not react further]
[takes off his shoes]
Don't do that.
BS Beaver's Son
Why'd you take your shoes off?
[pushes Ash away]
So I don't break your nose when I kick it. [proceeds to take Beaver's son out with some precision karate moves, ending with a throwdown on the ground. Beaver's son then gets up and walks away crying]
Ash I can fight my own fights.
[turns to Ash]
No, you can't.
[in a cellar with many of the other animal characters]
Alright, let's start planning. Who knows shorthand? [Linda raises her hand] Great! Linda! Lutra lutra - you got some dry paper? [she holds up paper] Here we go. Mole! Talpa europaea! What d'you got?
P Phil
I can see in the dark.
That's incredible! We can use that! Linda?
Rabbit! Oryctolagus cuniculus!
B Beaver
I can chew through wood.
Explosions! Flames! Burning things!
Demolitions expert! OK! Linda?
[grabs Weasel]
WEASEL! MUSTELA NIVALIS!
Ha! Ha-ha! Whoo! Okay. Ash, you and Agnes team up with these little kids and put together some kind of KP unit to keep this sewer clean. It's good for morale.
Ash Done. [to Agnes] What's KP?
A Agnes
I think it means janitors. [Ash spits]
V Vole
Hey-hey! Down here. I wanna go with you, too. I wanna fight!
Good, fabulous! Microtus pennsylvanicus!
[Vole laughs]
Hey, I didn't get a job yet, or a Latin name. What's my strength?
Listen, you're Kylie. You're an unbelievably nice guy. Your job is really, just to...be available, I think. I don't know your Latin name, I doubt they even had opossums in Ancient Rome.
Do you mind if I slide my bedroll slightly out from under the train set? It's hard to sleep in that corkscrew position.
Ash [gets up and notices Kristofferson]
There's a lot of attitudes going on around here. Don't let me get one. [goes back to reading his book]
No, it's only just that my spinal-cord...
Ash [gets up again]
Sleep, wherever you want, man. Here, take my bed. I'll just, uh...I'll crawl under the bookcase. [goes back to reading his book again] Who cares if I get splinters in my ears?
Ash [gets up one last time, irritated]
Oh, are you gonna pout about it? Because I've had it up to HERE with the "sad houseguest" routine! [he glares at Kristofferson, turns off the light, then continues reading once more with the nightlight on]
Good night. [pulls out the mat under Ash's train set, lays down under the table and eventually starts crying. Ash notices this as he shines his flashlight on Kristofferson, then climbs down, turns the train set on with music playing, then Kristofferson notices this and they both watch the train go around and around the track]
CS Coach Skip
Let's see some hustle!
Coach, we don't have whack-bat where I'm from. What are the rules?
CS Coach Skip
There's no whack-bat on the other side of the river?
No, we mostly just, uh, run grass sprints or play acorns.
CS Coach Skip
Huh. Well, it's real simple. Basically, there's three grabbers, three taggers, five twig runners, and the player at whack-bat. Center tagger lights a pine cone, chucks it over the basket, and the whack-batter tries to hit the cedar stick off the cross rock. Then the twig runners dash back and forth until the pine cone burns out and the umpire calls "hotbox". Finally at the end, you count up however many score-downs it adds up to and divide that by nine.
CS Coach Skip
Go in for Ash. Substitution! Ash, come out. You need a breather.
Ash What, what? Come out? What? I still feel good, Coach. Let me finish this eighth.
CS Coach Skip
No, no. Come on. Step out. Step out. Let's go.
Ash [Kristofferson runs out into the fiend]
Am I getting better, Coach?
CS Coach Skip
Well, you're sure as cuss not getting any worse.
Ash Really? You mean you I can end up being as good as my dad if I keep practicing?
CS Coach Skip
Your dad? Your dad was probably the best whack-bat player we ever had in this school. [points to the scoreboard showing Mr. Fox's name as Most Valuable Player of the year for four years] No, you don't wanna have to compare yourself to that.
Ash No, but I think I have some of the same raw natural talent, don't you?
CS Coach Skip
You're improving. Let's put it like that.
[After the animals have been flushed into the sewers by Bean's cider]
What just happened? Something with cider. That was dangerous. Is anyone hurt?
[furiously]
We're all hurt! My entire flint mine just got demolished!
Apple juice. Apple juice flood.
Let's do a head count. Everybody pick a buddy. Where'd the boys go? Ash?
Ash [off-screen]
I'm here!
[he and Felicity runs to him]
Ash, who's your buddy?
Ash Kristofferson.
Ash I lost him.
Ash Yeah, I lost him!
Ash I was in the kitchen! We were trying to find the necktie!
WHAT ARE YOU TALKING ABOUT?!
Ash It's my fault.
Oh, no. [snatches a nutmeg ginger apple snap from Ash's hand] Where did you get that nutmeg ginger apple snap, [tosses it] and WHY ARE YOU WEARING THAT FAKE BANDIT HAT?!
Ash We went to steal back your tail.
[finally realizes Kristofferson is captured]
Wha... Oh... no. Kristofferson! Kristofferson!
Ash Kristofferson!
Kristofferson! Kristofferson! Kristofferson! Kristofferson!
[Above the sewer, Kristofferson is captured by the farmers, as Mrs. Bean is holding him upside down.]
Wrap this wet, little mutt in the newspaper and put him in the box with some holes punched in the top.
[As they enter Bean's annex, they face an encounter with a rabid beagle named Spitz]
Give me a blueberry.
You didn't say anything...
You forgot the blueberries? I did say it. I wrote it on your paw.
Ash Yeah. It's written on the front of your paw.
Ash What's that white stuff around his mouth.
[Mr. Fox looks at dog pills for rabies.]
That's not soap.
Well, why does he have that bubbly...
He's rabid. With rabies. I've heard about this beagle. You two go ahead while I distract him.
[as Mr. Fox, Kylie, Ash, and Kristofferson drive out of Bean Annex, Kylie notices something]
Don't turn around!
[the animals stop the motorcycle and see a wolf staring at them from a snowy mountain]
Where'd he come from? [to the wolf] Where'd you come from?! What are you doing here?! [points to the wolf] Canis lupus! [points to himself] Vulpes vulpes! [to the others] I don't think he speaks English or Latin. [speaks French to the wolf] Pensez-vous que l'hiver sera rude? [to the others] I'm asking if he thinks we're in for a hard winter. [the wolf continues staring at them] He doesn't seem to know. [to the wolf] I have a phobia of wolves! [the wolf continues staring at them; Mr. Fox sheds a tear and then raise a fist in the air; the wolf does the same] What a beautiful creature. Wish him luck, boys.
Ash Good luck, wolf.
Good luck out there.
[the wolf starts to walk away but gives them on last look before disappearing into the forest]
