Ace I should be a lot more dead right now, right?
More lines from Ace
11 quotes Ace Ace We'll help you get your dumb owner back. You've got yourself a super team.
Ace You are not normal, man.
Ace So, it begins.
Ace That is cold, man.
Ace I am a wild animal.
Ace Oh, you think you're so great, don't you, Super dog?
Ace Smell is the sight of the nose.
Ace [after Krypto leaves]
You believe that dog? Has an emotional breakthrough, gets his powers back, and then bounces.
Ace You know what they say about dogs? [Krypto: Never feed us chocolate.] We love unconditionally.
Ace The farm upstate. An untamed paradise where animals run free, and they love and protect one another. And the lettuce grows on trees. No shelter lady watching our every move. Nope! It is a one hundred percent animal farm. [PB: That does not sound ominous at all.] It is perfect. And when I get us all out of here, well, that's where we are going to go.
Scenes with Ace
9 scenes Ace [As Ace escapes the animal shelter, he runs into Krypto]
Oh. Man, that hurt.
Yes. And that hurt me as well, due to the fact that I feel pain as any ordinary canine would.
Ace [pause]
Uh-huh. Anyway, I'm kind of in a middle of a prison break, so could you please...?
"Prison break"? [flies and lands in front of Ace] Stop right there and cease your unlawful activities, dog I've never met.
Ace The heck you talkin' about, man? You the same dog that was literally just behind me.
Impossible. That dog wore glasses. [pause] Now, surrender. I don't wanna hurt you.
Ace Oh, okay, so you wanna take it there. You wanna throw paws? Then fine. But I should warn you, I'm ⅛ boxer!
Ace Chihuahuas are vicious! [still struggling] Take that! Take a little bit of this! Tap out and I'll let you out. [Krypto yawns] Here comes the thunder! You're gonna get it! [fakes pain] AAH!!! Oh man, I'm gettin' a stitch. Yeah, I gotta take a knee. Oh, if I didn't get this stitch, I had you where I wanted you. Ah, banana! Get me-Get me a banana. Hurry up! [tries to make a run for it, but Krypto freezes him at his feet] That's cold, man.
Look, I know these powers are new to you, but when one has an abundance of power, they have a certain duty to use that power to... [interrupted by Ace who is peeing]
Ace Sorry. You were saying something?
I was making an inspiring hero speech. [Ace continues peeing] How much did you have to drink?
Ace I had two toilet bowls and a bidet. A bidet, too, which is crazy. I didn't even know that was a thing, but it's like a dog water fountain.
You disgusting animal.
Is this really the best way to find Superman? Because to me, this just seems gross.
Ace What do you mean gross? Smelling stuff is one of the greatest joys of being a dog, next to licking any part of your body. I mean, I lick myself all the time.
Well, that explains the breath.
Ace What o'what?
Nothing. [sits down]
Ace Okay, 'cause it sounded like a super adorable nickname you got for your walks with your owner.
Alright. Maybe this was when me and Supes used to hang out. [sadly] Every morning, since I was a puppy.
Aw. Well, you might not have your Superman, but at least you have us. A whole super team! The Mighty Oink, Squirrelverine, Droolo.
Ace [confused]
Seriously? "Droolo"?
Hey, wait, where's Shell on Wheels? Shell?
[laughs offscreen, the scene cuts to Merton talking to a construction worker hat]
What's happenin', sweet cheeks? [laughs again] Ah, I get it. The strong silent type. Who needs words?
Ace Yeah, what happened to them anyway?
I ate some green Kryptonite.
A Kryptonian's only weakness.
Why would you eat your weakness, ya dum-dum?
It was in some cheese.
A dog's only weakness.
Ace Well, I ate a toy dinosaur once. If we're goin' off that, I'd say you probably got a solid 2 days until that thing passes. Well, unless it's a Stegosaurus, and then you just pray.
Ace, deploy canine shield.
Ace What is a canine…?
[Krypto shoves him off the building as they fall towards the guinea pigs. Mark breathes fire at them]
Evade!
[they jump off of Ace as he is engulfed by the flames. Krypto, PB, Chip and Merton land on the ground safely as Ace lands hard on the ground]
Excellent shielding! That seemed incredibly painful.
Ace [groans]
Anybody want to switch powers?
Ace, what you did for that little girl...
Ace Nah, it was nothin'. I just did what any dog would do.
And they just...gave you away?
Ace I don't blame them. They were just protecting their kid.
But you saved her.
Ace And I'd do it again. Wosrt day of my life, but I wouldn't change a thing about it.
Why not?
Ace Well, when you love somebody, I mean, you really love them, you gotta be willin' to do anything for 'em. Even if that means letting 'em go.
Even if it hurts?
Ace Hmph. Especially then. You know what they say about dogs, don't you?
Never feed us chocolate.
Ace We love unconditionally.
[Ace, Merton, PB, and Chip are trying to break free]
It's no use. These cells were designed to keep anyone with powers from escaping. You'd have to be as strong as Superman to get out.
But we can't just give up.
There's a difference between giving up and knowing when it's over.
Ace Mm-mm! No way. Not for superheroes.
I'm not a superhero. I'm not even a good dog. When I was a puppy, I promised I'd watch over Superman. And I failed, all because I was jealous of Lois.
Who wouldn't be? Have you seen those bangs? Ba-bang!
Superman was my only friend, and I was afraid to lose that.
But you can't blame yourself.
I'm the only one to blame. If I really was his friend, I'd have been there for him no matter what. My father was right. My problem is me. [a single tear falls from his eyes] I'm sorry.
Ace Nah, man. You're good. You're just finally being real with yourself. You can't have justice without truth.
Thanks, Ace. But it's too late.
What do you mean?
You're flying.
What? [discovers that his powers are back] I'm... My powers. I'm back!
The Kryptonite has left the dog.
Ace [sniffs]
That does smell like sandalwood.
Ace [Krypto wakes from unconsciousness and finds Ace on top of him]
Ah... Man, it sucks bein' a canine shield. [stands up] I think my teeth are still glowing.
You saved my life, man.
Ace Yeah, well, you were in the middle of saving ours.
You know what they say about dogs?
Ace [chuckles nervously]
So something did get through that super skull of yours.
Don't make me take it back. [they both shake paws]
Green Lantern
[as Chip gets rubble off Green Lantern, he falls off until she catches him in her hands]
Hey, don't worry. I got you. [Chip sighs in relief]
Flash
Wow, this is so weird.
Flash
High-fiving so slow when we're both really fast. Huh.
[The Flash and Merton high-five. Now, PB faces Wonder Woman]
Princess Diana of Themyscira, I humbly present myself, Super Hog, still brainstorming, to you.
Wonder Woman
You will be a mighty warrior. And cuddle buddy.
Aquaman
[Wonder Woman hugs the pig. Nearby, Aquaman cries]
Woe is me. No one cares about the water guy.
[Keith's face appears in a puddle]
This water guy does. Hey, my name's Keith. [he climbs up to Aquaman's shoulder]
Aquaman
Aw, little piggy kisses.
[as Keith kisses his cheek, Mark smiles as he watches his friend]
Hey smokey. You're looking a little burnt out. Need a light? [lights up Mark, causing him to float]
Oh, look at me! [laughs]
Aw, come here.
I'm Mark. And your name?
[Ace and Batman sit beside each other]
So, you're a dog. I am the Batman. Sorry, I'm not really great with animals.
Ace Yeah, I'm not really great with people. Probably because of my traumatic puppyhood.
As a child, my family was taken from me.
Ace As a puppy, I was taken from my family.
So I've steeled myself.
Ace My emotions, always in check.
Both
No one ever getting past my impenetrable defenses.
Ace Ah, what the heck. [leaps on Batman and licks him, making the Dark Knight laugh]
Good boy. OK, the Batman loves you, too.
