Jay Jedi bitch.
Played by Jason Mewes 
Chasing Amy (1997) · 61 quotes
Chasing Amy (1997) · 61 quotes
4th most-quoted character in Chasing Amy (1997): in 9 of its 61 quotes
Most scenes with: Silent Bob (4), Holden McNeil (2)
You gotta boil it down to the essentials. It's like Cube says, "Life ain't nothin' but bitches and money."
More lines from Jay
3 quotes Jay Jay [to Holden]
Bitch tasted life, yo, now she's settlin' for your boring, funny-book-makin' ass.
Jay Bitch pressin' charges? I get that a lot.
Scenes with Jay
5 scenes Jay So why the long face, Horse? Banky on the rag?
I'm just, ahh... just havin' a little girl trouble.
Jay Bitch pressin' charges? I get that a lot.
What? What did you say?
You're Chasing Amy.
Jay What do you look so shocked for, man, fat bastard does this all the time. He thinks just cause he doesn't say anything, it'll have this huge impact when he does open his ****in' mouth...
[to Jay]
Jesus Christ, why don't you shut up? You're always yap-yap-yappin' all the time, you're givin' me a ****in' headache. [to Holden] I went through something like what you're talkin' 'bout, 'couple years ago, this chick named Amy.
Jay When?
[to Holden]
So there's me an' Amy, and we're all inseparable, right? Just big time in love. And then about four months down the road, the idiot gear kicks in, and I ask about the ex-boyfriend, which, as we all know, is a really dumb move, but you know how it is - you don't really want to know, but you just have to know, right? Stupid guy bullshit. Anyway she starts telling me all about him - how they fell in love, and how they went out for a couple of years, how they lived together, her mother likes me better, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah - and I'm okay. But then she drops the bomb on me, and the bomb is this: it seems that a couple of times, while they were going out, he'd brought some people to bed with them - m?nage a trois, I believe it's called. Now this just blows my mind, right? I mean, I am not used to that sort of thing. I was raised Catholic, for God's sakes.
Jay Saint Shithead.
[Silent Bob elbows him. Jay raises his fist as if to strike] [to Jay]
Do something. [to Holden] So I'm totally weirded out by this right? And I just start blasting her - like I don't know how to deal with what I'm feeling, so I figure the best way is by calling her "s**t", and tell her she was used - I mean, I'm out for blood. I really want to hurt this girl. And I'm like "What the **** is your problem?" and she's just all calmly trying to tell me, like, it was that time, it was that place, and she doesn't think she should apologize because she doesn't feel that she's done anything wrong. And I'm like, "Oh, really?" That's when I look her straight in the eye and tell her it's over. I walk.
Jay ****in' A.
No, idiot. It was a mistake. I wasn't disgusted with her, I was afraid. At that moment, I felt small - like...like I'd lacked experience, like I'd never be on her level, like I'd never be enough for her or something like that, you know what I'm sayin'? But what I did not get - she didn't care. She wasn't looking for that guy anymore. She was...she was looking for me, for - for the Bob. But, uh, by the time I figured this all out, it was too late, you know. She'd moved on, and all I had to show for it was some foolish pride, which then gave way to regret. She was the girl, I know that now. But I pushed her away. So I've spent every day since then chasing Amy...so to speak.
Jay Man, why do you always have to tell that ****in' gay story?
Man, shut up.
Jay You shut up, you fat ****!
Jay What's that shit he's got us saying?
Oh, umm..."Snootchie Bootchies."
Jay Snootchie Bootchies. Who the **** talks like that? That is **** baby talk.
